Post # 91
made2comment : I saw a dad grab his obnoxious toddler by the arm of his coat the other day at a wedding… mom was letting him run wiiild, dad got there late. He grabbed that kid so quick, whispered something (i heard the word “home”,) & after that, i literally didn’t hear a PEEP out of him the whole night. Just ate & sat calmly, maaaybe 3 years old tops, little tiny guy that still looked like a baby. So it CAN be done. Yea, kids will be kids, but behavior is defs like 90% a reflection of parenting. Parents that argue otherwise are often the ones that can’t control theirs.
I’d bet money that kid fears his father and that’s why he behaves. I’d rather my kid have a tantrum or two while we work on learning appropriate behavior than have her listen out of fear.
Post # 92
- Wedding: May 2019 - City, State
LilliV : Exactly. Fear is the LAZIEST type of parenting.
Also, people seem to be missing the fact that the mom did not actually leave the toddler there. She didn’t even leave the older sibling there. She went, gave the toddler a chance to prove he could do what he wanted to and behave, but he wasn’t able to. Most likely she knew he wouldn’t be able to, and had no intentions of leaving him there. And how are we to assume the toddler was the reason she moved the sister? Maybe she just wasn’t comfortable leaving either of her kids next to the OP who was clearly giving her dirty looks the whole time. Maybe she just bought the correct number of seats to be fair, and had no intentions of actually keeping either child in a seat rows away from her.
I don’t recall OP saying that the mom turned to her and explicitly outlined all of her parenting strategies and decisions. OP seems to be making a lot of assumptions about a brief interaction that ultimately only inconvenienced her for a minute or two, but clearly she let that minute or two ruin her whole movie experience. Honestly, that’s on her. She chose to get this worked up about something pretty minor.
Post # 93
LilliV : OMG totally. As a parent I have been told on this thread that if my son tantrums I am lazy, its my fault, I shouldn’t take him out the house, I shouldn’t do this, I shouldn’t do that.
Parenting a toddler is HARD and sometimes you have to pick your battles. Sometimes that means you give in because difusing the tantrum is the better option. I don’t judge any mother whos kid is having a tantrum in public because I an see the look in her eyes. It is the same look we all have when it happens. The embarrasement that it has happened, the worry about the impact on others and the sheer tireness and frustration of trying to reason with a toddler. We give each other an understanding and sympathetic smile.
Those who are also worried about creeps in the theatre. I am sure the mother risk assessed the situation with leaving her 9 year old in the seat.
Post # 94
Everyone has a right to go out in public and enjoy a dinner, a walk, shopping or a movie – even a younger-audience movie – without being bothered by someone’s whiney toddler; or even an older child that’s pitching a fit for that matter.
How hard is it to say: “Behave or we’re going home.” ? My parents used to do this with my brother and I all the time. It’s not rocket science, people aren’t asking you to perform brain surgery or age your child from 3 to 13 in two minutes. You give them two options. Behave and stay or misbehave and leave.
And I’m sorry but what person gets seats in a different part of the theater from their young child/children? You can’t see them, you can’t monitor them; hell the lights could come on at the end of the show and they not even be there! They more than likely wanted to enjoy the movie without their own child inconveniencing them. I’ve seen it a dozen times and perhaps if you don’t want to take care of your children, make them mind, or have to watch them out in public, you shouldn’t have them.
Post # 95
It’s also very possible that there was a related adult nearby watching the kids but mom was just seated elsewhere and came to diffuse the situation. As PPs mentioned, this was likely a few minutes of an exchange (if we want to call it that) at most involving OP. We don’t know the whole story. OP was annoyed at the presence of the children period.