- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2012
Fiance and I have a small guest list…like 50 people…for our destination wedding (which for a Destination Wedding I think is a pretty fair size!). We know that only about 35 are coming since some family members are just much much older and wanted the invitation more as like a “keepsake”. We really have just very very close friends and family coming.
So anyways, a bunch of people have just like “assumed” that they were going to be invited when we got engaged. So then when they weren’t they were sort of pissy about it or shocked. One of my guests wrote on my facebook wall about her dress that she was wearing, and one of the “not invited” (who mind you, I haven’t seen in like…7 years) wrote “I’ve always wanted to wear black to a wedding…sigh…” Fiance has said that people have said things to him too like “Why haven’t I gotten my invitation yet?” One GUY even booked his trip to our wedding without an invitation (Um, what?)…
We also wrote which people could bring guests and which couldn’t. We allowed ALL significant others, boyfriends, girlfriends, etc. However, we didn’t want people just bringing a date “just because” since it is so small. Of course, one person who we specifically did NOT want to bring a guest is now bringing a guest who we have never met, and really just don’t want to be there (FI is really irked since this girl has a history of pulling stuff like this all the time, and she always brings guys who are completely inappropriate. Her last “date” called him by the N-word. Um. So yeah, we are worried).
So now I feel like I’m totally being a huge B because I’m upset about it. I don’t want to be all bridezilla about it, but come on this is our wedding too. I’m trying to just ignore this girl’s comment, and the guy who like just decided he was coming we just added to the list and wrote it off like we had sent him an invite and just sent it out after the fact. And as for the girl who is now bringing a date, all the groomsmen are on standby to keep this guy away from my Fiance if he turns out to be a bit racist or an A$$hole.
Finally, another guest then had no problem letting me know in no uncertain terms that she was planning on wearing a white one-shoulder short dress from The Limited’s wedding collection because “well your dress isn’t one shoulder, so it should be fine”. I tried saying “Since the ceremony is so small and intimate, we are really hoping that everyone can wear darker shades to make it feel cozy and romantic.” And she is like “Well, I already bought it, and it was expensive.”
I’m so nervous and upset about all of the above I could just cry. I haven’t done anything yet besides whine to my Maid/Matron of Honor and ask Fiance if I am being unreasonable, to which he says “No” because of course he is irked about all of this too. Maid/Matron of Honor says I just have to deal with it since there’s nothing I can do about it, and I can’t tell people who they can bring or what they can wear to my wedding. I thought since we didn’t allow the one girl a guest it was fine, but now we can’t stop her. And we can’t ask someone to wear dark colors and not white, so now I feel like I’m being totally irrational for being irked and like a huge B.
Thanks for letting me vent.