Who didn't go ring shopping prior to proposal?

posted 1 year ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2022

We picked mine out together. If you’re not picky and you’ve expressed that to him then let it be!! 🙂

Post # 17
Member
1540 posts
Bumble bee

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@snicole:  I didn’t have much to do with my e-ring. We did go to a store where I got professionally sized and I did say I like heart diamonds but the rest was left up to him.  Every couple is different. I am not personally into ring shopping and I was happy that I was surprised at the proposal. 

Post # 18
Member
2350 posts
Buzzing bee

I think it is a cultural thing – UK Bee here, and I don’t know anyone who has shopped for rings before a proposal. (Or who’s known they were getting engaged x months before the proposal – if you’ve discussed it in that much detail then you’re engaged!) Either the guy buys a ring beforehand – maybe asking advice from the girl’s friends or family or proposes without a ring and they shop later.  ‘Placeholder’ rings are sometimes used, where a cheap costume ring is used as a standin for the proposal and the real ring chosen together later.  

My OH proposed with a ring he thought I’d like, but took the precaution of making sure he could take it back if I didn’t.  I loved it, but it was way too big for me (it was too tight for his little finger, so he thought it would fit my ring finger, but his hands are huge!!!)  so he picked out another one in the right size after the proposal and sent me a picture to check I liked it before he bought it.  

I’d say do whatever works for you.  This is your engagement and no one else’s, so yours are the only opinions that matter.

Post # 19
Member
202 posts
Helper bee

We didn’t. I got engaged in March when the worst of the covid crisis was happening where we live. He used what he had from his mom that he was going to put toward my ring. We also eloped during quarantine. My engagement ring setting was actually mailed out from the seller yesterday! It will be a while until I have my ring though because the stone I’m using is with family and we are still quarantining the same as we did in March. 

Post # 21
Member
880 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

 I told my husband preferred style (round brilliant solitaire) and that was it. and I was completely fine with it.

Post # 22
Member
839 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2019 - Country/barn

We talked casually about the future many times. But we never went ring shopping. Married a year May 4!

Post # 23
Member
2035 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Just gotta marry a guy who would ask your input and then follow through with what you say, honestly. My husband asked me what I liked, I sent him some Pinterest photos, and my ring is exactly what I asked for XD I didn’t want to go ring shopping. I wanted to be surprised. 

Post # 24
Member
1919 posts
Buzzing bee

Didn’t ring shop for my current marriage. The proposal was a total surprise and I LOVE my ring.

We had talked preferences before because I had been married once before and felt very resentful in that even WITH ring shopping, my ex-husband still felt his personal preference on the style of the ring outweighed mine since he was paying for it. 

I think it’s still pretty split down the middle about those who shop beforehand, and those who don’t. Unless you are super particular in what you want, I wouldn’t take not having shopped as a negative. It’s just what is working for your relationship.

 

Post # 25
Member
714 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
@snicole:  sounds like you know your answer! I’m sure you will love whatever he gets!

Post # 26
Member
611 posts
Busy bee

I shared some pictures of what I liked and we agreed on a metal (skin allergies), but ultimately he picked it out. It was special to me that he pick something out solo, but I see how it can be super helpful to try on some before/together. I definitely think you should give him a little guidance!

Post # 27
Member
3146 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I/we didn’t go ring shopping. Our entire conversation about rings was DH saying “I always thought you’d like a vintage or antique ring” and me saying I would 🤷🏼‍♀️ He did an amazing job and I love my 1920’s ring!!!

Post # 28
Member
211 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

We didn’t! In fact I had no idea he’d bought the ring when he proposed. We’d talked about styles, (I wanted a coloured gemstone rather than a diamond) but he chose it all by himself.

 

Oh and my sister’s fiance proposed without a ring, it was totally spontaneous on NYE. They then went shopping together afterwards.

Post # 29
Member
4893 posts
Honey bee

I didn’t go ring shopping with my first husband.  I did drop hints about what I wanted and he actually did a great job.  The marriage was a sham, but damn that ring was pretty and I was completely surprised by the proposal.

 

Post # 30
Member
2421 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

My husband picked out a ring with no input from me. He did not know my size or style. I learned later that the jeweler (it was a major chain) explained that it could be sized later, or exchanged if necessary. However, he picked out an understated solitare that I really liked. It was too big so the first few days I wore another ring over it so it would not slip off before agreeing to part with the ring long enough for it to be sized. Had I picked out a ring myself it would have looked very similar to what he chose, so that was lucky.

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