(Closed) Who didn't have a shower?

posted 7 years ago in Parties
  • poll: What do you think?

    I had neither a shower NOR a bachelorette, and I don't regret it.

    I had neither, and I regret it.

    I had both, and I don't regret it.

    I had both and I regret it.

    I did not have a shower, but I did have a bachelorette and I don't regret it.

    I did not have a shower, but I did have a bachelorette and I regret it.

    I did not have a bachelorette, but I did have a shower, and I don't regret it.

    I did not have a bachelorette, but I did have a shower, and I regret it.

    OP, just have the bachelorette!

  • Post # 3
    3751 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: April 2014

    My friend refused to have one because she’s been living on her own for so long and didn’t need anything. We threw her a little impromptu brunch anyway.

    You don’t really ask for a shower, they will decide if they want to throw you one and just plan it. You can tell them NOT to if you don’t want them to. I think you should just let them do what they are going to do. If they throw you one, great, if not, no big deal, right?

    Post # 5
    6014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    You can ask your Mom for help with this, like get an Aunt or a friend of your mom’s to host it.  Most of the weddings I’ve been in had showers thrown by older family members or friends of the mom.  My mom passed and I had already moved, so my Mother-In-Law threw my shower with my Aunt.  Only one person from my wedding party was there, one of my cousins.  She had nothing to do with the planning or execution of the shower.

    Post # 6
    1063 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    We’ve insisted on no shower.  All of our friends and family are out of town anyways, so it seemed super inappropriate to ask them to fly to an event that is 100% gift collection.

    My office generally throws a small shower for folks who are getting married, so I wouldn’t be shocked if I got a little work shower.

    Post # 8
    11735 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @jwdesiree:  you shouldn’t ask anyone to throw you a shower. So if no one offers, you simply don’t get one.

    Post # 9
    4950 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    I’m eloping/having a private wedding (as in, my own mother won’t even be there) so the only person I could actually invite to a shower would be myself. 

    Post # 10
    6014 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    Yea my Mother-In-Law insisted we have one, we weren’t even registered for anything we had everything already.  It was mostly to meet his family that I hadn’t met yet… which was fine.  Good for you, and I’m glad your BM’s are so great. 

    Post # 11
    480 posts
    Helper bee

    Since most the people I would want to invite are out of state, I didn’t even think about a shower. Well, I remember I got really cranky and depressed after I went to FSIL’s shower because I most likely wasn’t going to get one, but then I got over it. But my Maid/Matron of Honor has been bugging me for months to let her throw one for me, even if it’s small and a few days before the wedding, and even if it will be mostly the groom’s family in attendance. She just wants to throw me a shower, which is sweet. But if she wasn’t so adamant about it, I would not be having one. 

    Post # 12
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’m not really planning on having either. I’m most likely not going to have a bridal party, so I may go out to dinner or wine tasting with some close friends if I feel the need, but I won’t consider it a bachelorette party. I don’t like showers for the same reason that a PP mentioned. SO and I already live together, and we have an apartment full of things that we specifically picked out and love. We don’t have enough space to house a popcorn machine, six sets of dishes, etc. that someone else liked. I also hate being the center of attention and receiving gifts.

    Post # 13
    9916 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I can’t vote in your poll.  I did not have a shower, and I don’t care.  I did have a bachelorette party, and it was awesome!  I don’t regret not having a shower, and I don’t regret having a bachelorette party.

    Post # 14
    535 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    We’re having a small wedding and most of the local guests are already helping with my wedding, so I cant invite them to a shower. Everyone else is out of state so I can’t ask them to drive 10+ hours to give me a gift. My church family has been asking when my shower is, but if I’m not inviting them to the wedding I can’t very ask them to give me a gift anyway. It sucks, I’d love to have one, but I chose to have a small wedding and therefore have to accept there are some consequences of that decision.

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