(Closed) Who do you invite to the rehearsal dinner?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3575 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

75 people does sound like a lot to me.  We had around 35.  We invited:

1. Wedding party and if they had a SO/Spouse

2. Family – Groom’s immediate, My immediate

3. Officiant

4. Any out of town guest who arrived the day we had the rehearsal dinner which was in the hotel we were all staying at.

5. Out of Town cousins – only because their parents were doing a reading and my one cousin designed our invites.  Otherwise, they would not have been invited.


Post # 4
5797 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

Basically we invited whatever number came out to about 35 people because that was the size we were going for. This includes the bridal party and their SOs and family. We are not inviting all the out of towners because that would more than double the guestlist.

Post # 5
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

immediate family and people participatning in the wedding are the only “required” inivitees. could you cut your parents’ siblings and Out of Town cousins if you need to keep the budget lower? that or have a pizza party or bbq at someone’s house.

Post # 6
362 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

 We didn’t even invite out of town guests, there were too many… It was both of our immediate families, the wedding party and their SO’s. We had 30, had we invited all Out of Town guests it would have been about 75.. The rehearsal dinner is suppose to be small and intimate if you ask me. Neither of our parents invited their siblings and none of our cousins were invited.. But, we did have reservations at a bar afterwards for a table that all the Out of Town guests, etc went to and my Dad paid for a few hundred dollars worth of drinks there after the dinner…

Post # 7
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

I think that we had around 60.

-Wedding party and their significant others

-Family- immediate and extended (this was super important to my inlaws)

-Officiant and his wife (they are family friends)

-Our reader and her husband

-Friend who was my DOC for free and her husband

-A few special Out of Town guests (FIs best friend is deployed so we asked his parents and girlfriend to come to dinner, close family friends of my inlaws who traveled far)

Post # 8
5271 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I was always under the school of thought the the Rehearsal Dinner is only for those that are actually a part of the wedding (i.e. those who participate in the rehearsal, go to the rehearsal dinner w/ the participants guests) So this would be immediate families, wedding party and their dates, and anyone else who is part of the wedding.

But, some people believe that all out of town guests must be invited too.

Post # 10
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

There are no real rules about who to invite – its whatever works best for you.

We fought tooth and nail over this with my ILs for what seemed like months. THey thought we should invite all Out of Town guests and we thought we should just invite family and bridal party. In the end we ended up inviting all of our guests to our Rehearsal Dinner and I am SO glad that we did!! We had about 90 people at our Rehearsal Dinner and it was so much fun. It also gave me an opportunity to see people more. I felt less obligated to go around to everyone at the wedding because I was able to spend a significant amount of time with everyone the night before!


ETA – if we had just invited Out of Town guests it would have been about 95% of our guest list anyways so thats why we just invited everyone. Only a handful of people were considered “in town” (aka didnt have to drive more than an hour to get there)…everyone else had to fly or drive several hours (at least 5+) to get there. Even thought we fought about this I am so happy with the decision we made because it was less stress on us at our reception!

Post # 11
8 posts
  • Wedding: May 2011

I know that I am going to have the bridal party and their significant others, immediate family members (brothers, sisters, parents, grandparents) and those from out of town.

If you have close friends that may not be in the wedding, but you still want them to come, I don’t see anything wrong with that 🙂

Post # 12
624 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I know this thread is old but I have to start planning this… So far we have the wedding party and their so’s, my parents, his parents and step parents. Since it’s a Mass, do we also invite the readers and who is offering the gifts up? Do they need to be at the rehearsal at all? If so then I will invite them to the dinner. Without the readers included it’s going to be a total of 22…

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