Post # 1
I overheard some coworkers having this debate yesterday, and no one was certain of the answer. If Person A proposes and gives a ring to Person B, and then Person A cheats on Person B, and then Person B breaks off the engagement, who gets the ring?
The way I see it, while Person B directly ended the engagement, Person A indirectly ended it first by cheating, so Person B is under no obligation to return the ring. But several other people were of the opinion that if Person B was the one who officially terminated the relationship, that the ring needed to be returned to Person A.
I’m interested in both legal and ethical viewpoints, so chime in regardless of your lawyerly status. (And yes, this is totally hypothetical – there’s no trouble in my relationship 🙂 )
Post # 3
It depends on the state but some states require it be returned to the purchaser no matter what the circumstances are.
Post # 4
It depends on the state but only if they take it to court.
I think if you cheat you ended the engagement. IMO
Post # 5
I think person B should get to keep it (especially if they’ve lost deposit money on the wedding). That’s the price A pays for cheating.
Post # 6
I voted for person B keeping the ring, although I can’t imagine ever wanting to keep the ring if I were person B.
Post # 7
Legally speaking, it depends what state you’re in. In some states a ring is considered a gift… and therefore it stays with Person B regardless of anything. In some states it is considered a contract “I give you ring, you marry me.” If Person B breaks their end of the bargain by calling off the wedding, the contract is broken and the ring goes back to Person A.
Interesting to note, in ALL states (that I’m aware of), if person B went through with the marriage and then called things off 1 day later, they keep the ring regardless (the contract being to GET married, not stay that way.)
Ethically I think it should stay with Person B… Person A really is the one who ended things by cheating.
Practically, why would Person B even WANT the ring after what Person A did? Just to be petty? Not sure we should encourage that.
Post # 8
Can’t give any legal opinion, but I would think that if person A cheated, they broke the contract first. For me, monogamy is not exactly fine print in a marriage “contract”, you know? I would think it’s kind of understood. So I think person B should get the ring if they want it.
Post # 9
Miss Manners says the ring should be returned in case of a broken engagement.
However, I think that, if cheated on, you’re entitled to keep the ring, although it would feel really good throwing it at him.
Post # 10
The noncheater 🙂
Now I did have a friend that broke off her engagement because her fiance was a lying d-bag, and she KEPT the ring and told him that until he paid her back the 5 grand he owed her (she paid for him out of pocket for his college courses) that she would keep the ring. Now this was apparently his grandmother’s ring and she told him well if they want it back so bad then they’ll loan you the money. Oooooh man I thought that was awesome! This guy really sucked so I was proud of her for standing her ground 🙂
Post # 11
I think that unless it is a family ring that Person B should keep it. Person A broke the engagement by cheating, so tough luck for them! If I were person B I’d sell the ring and go on a nice holiday!
Post # 12
Legally, I don’t know. Morally, Person B shouldn’t have to return the ring to cheating Person A.
Post # 13
I’d give it back, why the f would I want a ring from a cheating dbag? Just to hold it over his head and get a little revenge? Eh I don’t have time for that shit, I’d chuck it at his head.
Post # 14
@redbullfanatic– i totally agree. i think the *only* reason I’d maybe keep the ring is if I REAAAAAALLLY hated the guy for some reason then maybe (just to piss him off) I’d keep it, sell it, and donate the money to charity.
Post # 15
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
Legally? No idea – but if I were in that situation as person B, I wouldn’t WANT to keep the ring, and I’d give it back.
Post # 16
In My Humble Opinion, person A and B need to come to some sort of agreement.