(Closed) Who goes to the rehearsal?

posted 8 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
2000 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’ll be going to my rehersal – just the wedding party needs to go to the rehersal. If your bridal party’s SO’s want to stand around while they do their thing, that’s up to you if you want them to hang out, or up to your bridal party if they bring them. At the dinner, though..most of the time your bridal party will bring their SO’s. Your parents should be at the actual rehersal though, most importantly your father, and his parents don’t have to be there.

Post # 4
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

“I read somewhere that it’s bad luck for the bride to attend the rehearsal?”

Throw out whatever book or magazine you read this in. That’s literally the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.

It’s you, your Fiance, both sets of parents, bridal party and groomsmen, and anyone doing any readings or anything. Basically anyone taking part in the actual ceremony. You do not have to and you should not invite anyone to the actual rehearsal that is not a direct participant in the ceremony – no wives/husbands/fiances/bfs/gfs of the people in the wedding, no extraneous family members. They may come to the dinner but not to the actual ceremony rehearsal.

Post # 5
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Oh, I will definitely be at my rehearsal.  I’ll be running it, I think, since I am the one with opinions about how EVERYTHING should go.  Other than that, the wedding party, my parents (since dad is walking me down the aisle), the officiant, the flower girls, the ring bearer, and their parents.  FI’s mom will probably also come too, for moral support, and b/c she is hosting the rehearsal dinner right afterwards…

Post # 6
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I plan on inviting my parents, his parents, my grandfather (he’s coming  from outside the country), the bridal party, and some friends that are coming out from NJ. 

Post # 7
Member
2000 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I like @kittyachi’s answer…she nailed it

Post # 8
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Oh yeah… and Fiance will also be there of course!

Post # 10
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think anyone “involved” in the ceremony is supposed to attend the rehearsal itself.  So that would include you and your parents, and anyone else that may be doing a reading or just walking down the aisle when all the other guests are seated (goes without saying that means the BM’s and GM’s).  And obviously the officiant should be there if its possible.  And then you can invite basically whoever you want to the rehearsal dinner but I’d stick with the people in the wedding party and their guests, that’s customary. 

My concern is that I’d like the wedding party to come to the rehearsal without their date or guest and scoop them up after to go to the dinner.  I’m pretty sure that’s unreasonable as their guests will just be sitting in the hotel room but I’m also pretty sure I don’t mind that.  There are a couple people in particular that would be there but I can only handle them in small doses regularly, let alone a day that may involve high levels of stress.

Post # 13
Member
4001 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Since you said you have a large bridal party I’d suggest at least sending an e-vite, if you want to do a physical, more formal invite.  Having something in ‘writing’ seems like the way to go though.  You don’t want mass confusion.  I’ll probably skip it all together and tell everyone in person and hope for the best.  You’ll of course have to follow-up with them via telephone anyway, its pretty much inevitable.

You don’t rehearse your vows.  I think its just a run through of the order people will be walking and the way in which to line up at the alter.  I’m no expert but I think its just to make sure things run smoothly so the timings right the day of the wedding.

Post # 14
Member
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

@jennifer – totally not unreasonable. i’ve never gone to the rehearsal unless i was actually in the wedding. my SO always met us at the dinner. same goes for weddings my Fiance has been in.

Post # 15
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’m having a hard time figuring out how a rehearsal would even work without the bride.

At the rehearsal you’ll practice walking down the aisle and map out where everyone ought to stand during the ceremony.  If you’ll need to move around (up to the altar, etc.) while saying your vows you’ll be given guidance on when and how to change positions.  It’s also a chance for the bridal party to meet the groomsmen and learn where they need to be and when on the day of.

All of this stuff sounds basic now, but big dress + nerves + audience + emotion  = all capacity for rational thought leaving the brain.  If you haven’t run through your moves at least once beforehand it can be easy to feel completely overwhelmed.

 

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