(Closed) Who got engaged at a year or less of dating?

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 31
Member
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

We moved in together after 5 months and he proposed at 9 months. We were married around 18 months together. He was 31 when we met and I was 25. When you know, you know. We actually didn’t get any naysayers (at least to our faces). The general reaction was that everyone knew it was coming. 

Post # 32
Member
1443 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Fiance and I were engaged after just shy of 1 year together. We met and were friends starting our Freshman year of college. We officially started dating our Senior year of college and actually moved in with one another and three other roomates on our two month anniversary. I would have to say that moving in together definately solidified our relationship quicker than I think it would have if we had not been living together so soon. We were talking marriage jokingly at about 2 months in (when we moved in with one another), and then seriously at 6 months.

At approximately 11 months, we were engaged, and although our progress from dating to engaged was quick, we have had/are having a longer engagement (Mostly for my sanity in the planning process. We are both natural born entertainers and are looking forward to a huge celebration tied to our marriage, which is taking quite a bit of careful planning.) Since our engagement, we moved to an apartment with just the two of us and have been living that way for about a year. In all that time, our relationship has just seemed to get easier and easier instead of harder.

It was actually the opposite of the “honeymoon effect”, I think. Moving in together after only two months with three other roomates, when we had both previously just lived with our parents, during our final and hardest year at our university was a HUGE transition, and definately a strain, but we got past it and seem to fall in love more and more each day. Obviously, every relationship is different, but we were engaged in under a year and I wouldn’t have had it any other way and do not regret it in the slightest.

Oh by the way, I was 21 and he was 22 when we got engaged, and we wil both be 23 when we get married.

Post # 33
Member
1346 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

My partner & I got engaged after 9 months of dating (we had been living together for 3 months at this point due to my lease ending) but tbh we went through ALOT together before we got engaged. My partner had surgery to remove bone cancer after us being together a month & Other bits & pieces. But we had stuck by one another through it all and everyone knew we were going to get engaged at some point so they weren’t shocked at all but very happy for us instead.

The only nay-sayers I came across was two girls at work (one jealous as she had been with her partner for 10 years and nothing, & another who had gone through a very bitter divorce not too long before my engagement was announced) & a few other people on here. But I dont care they aren’t me! They don’t know us or how we feel about one another.

Post # 34
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I may be the record here (took a quick glance above), but we were engaged right after Christmas 2010, just under 3 months after our first date!  And we didn’t even know each other until August 2010.

I was shocked by how fast it all happened.  Around Thanksgiving, I wanted to have a talk about things were going, figuring we were going to talk about moving in together and possibly one of us giving up our job (because we work together).  He floored me when he said he wanted to marry me.  But he wanted to wait to move to that step until after we met each other’s families.

Once we were engaged, we didn’t tell any family for a month or so, and waiting a bit longer before telling friends — mostly because we didn’t want to deal with the naysayers.  But family and friends were very supportive — they all had been able to tell we were heading in that direction from the onset.

As to why we got so serious so fast — it was a combination of things, really.  We felt safe with each other and could share some difficult stuff we were contending with.  We work together and knew we could work as a team in tense situations.  And we had enough experience (30 & 32 yos) to know what we want and to know that what we had was different from any other relationship we’d ever been in.

Post # 35
Member
4608 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

I think I knew around 6-8months.  It will be 2 years in May, still waiting…

I’m 21, SO is 33.  I’m still at university, and thats the main reason he’s we’re putting it off…

Post # 36
Member
3261 posts
Sugar bee

We got engaged after 6 months, best desicion I ever made. 

Post # 37
Member
55 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

We got engaged 10 months after we met/started dating.  (My brothers and sister-in-law tried to  speed up the process by planting a toy ring in a cupcake at my nephew’s birthday party 3 months before that). We travled to Costa Rica together after 2.5 months, moved in together after 5 months and combined finances after 6 months. We’ve been engaged now for 3 months, and will be getting married in 12 days.  

While I have relatives that say we are on the “fast track”, they have all said it in a positive manner.  His family and my family love how happy we make one another.  

Post # 38
Member
11525 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We did!  We were “matched” by eHarmony about five or six weeks before we first spoke on the phone, so all of our early communications were through that site.  We lived in different states, three hours apart, and DH has a very demanding job, works every weekend, and was a single dad with 50 percent custody of his minor kids, so actually seeing each other was a HUGE challenge.  Our first date was exactly a month after our first phone call, and, by our second date, we both figured out that this was probably “it” for us. We were both in our 40s, and DH had been married before.  I had been engaged once before, many years before, but canceled my wedding because I knew that my first Fiance and I just were not on the same path spiritually, and God had something else — someONE else — for me, and I did not want to miss out on that. 

We both were only looking for the person whom we believed God had selected to be our mates, and, things just seemed to fall into place for us, despite the MANY issues that would have to be resolved in a change this monumental, especially for me. We only were able to see each other two or three times a month, for a period of hours at a time, but, very early on he started telling me that he planned to propose. I was a little scared at the pace of the relationship, after having deliberately waited SOOOO long to finally meet the RIGHT person, so I did not give him the “green light” to move forward with a proposal until four months had passed.  We were engaged by the five-month mark, and we were married 11 months later.

The only person who expressed some concern was his mother, because she did not want to see her son make a hasty decision, as the men in her family were often known for doing. (My Father-In-Law proposed to my Mother-In-Law within a week of meeting her! 🙂 My family and friends, however, were all thrilled that I FINALLY met “the ONE,” and, if anything, were almost shoving me down the aisle, lol!

Post # 39
Member
254 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I’ll play, but it’s not my story. I was with my Fiance for 4 years before we decided to get engaged – but we were talking about it way early in our relationship. It turned in to more of a financial waiting game for us because he wanted to do everything right.

However! I would say it is totally dependent on your relationship and a go-with-your-gut kind of thing.

My mom was engaged to a long-term BF when she was about 24, met my dad at a party one night and knew immediately she had to end things with her Fiance at the time and that my dad was “the one”. She ended things with guy #1, started dating my dad about a month later, they decided to get married three months after that and had their wedding on the anniversary of their first date.

I don’t think my mom was met with a lot of naysayers (because no one liked Fiance #1), but she was met with a lot of surprise. She’s a pretty sensible lady and always has been, and has always been committed to having a family, so she just laid down the law with my grandparents and let them know that it was her choice and it was meant to be. Kind of funny (but not in a ha ha way), her siblings were probably the biggest opposition she faced, and ridiculed her because they were in long-term relationships with the people they eventually wed. My uncle was divorced within 3 years, my aunt within 2 and my mom is celebrating her 30th anniversary in a few months.

So do your own thing if it feels right, and who cares about everyone else 😛 My parents didn’t know each other before they started dating, and they didn’t live together until after they announced their engagement.

Post # 40
Member
41 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My FH and I are both 26. We met in July (online, mind you), we moved in together in November/December, and were engaged by the end of December. We are getting married in June. So… we dated 5 months before we got engaged, and we will not have even known one another a whole year before we get married. Because we met online AND we are getting married so quickly, we did have some crazy looks from people. However, for those who truly know us, they have been so supportive. My family loves him, and I feel as though I am already part of his family. We know we are supposed to be together, so we want to get married as soon as we can.

I never thought I would (or even wanted to) live with someone before I got married. Because of our circumstances (long-distance living, job searching, etc.), he ended up moving in with me. It has been the best decision. Because we had only known one another for a few months, and our time together was very sparse (just on weekends), this time has allowed us to get to know one another so much more. Normally, I would say that it is very stupid to move in with someone after knowing them only a few months. However, our circumstances led us to that point, and I would have never lived with him unless I knew we were supposed to be together for the long haul.

In all, we are young, we met online, and we are getting married super fast. We have had some critics, but those who know us are completely stoked for us. When you know… well, you know! Be confident of that, and don’t let anyone make you feel different. You are the only one who knows how you feel… just prove those naysayers wrong!! 🙂

Post # 41
Member
3501 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2002

i found Fiance on 12.13.10 through mutual friends on facebook… spent a week with texting & phone calls. met in person with a group of friends on 12.17.10… had our first date 12.21.10 and officially became bf/gf on 2.6.11. we got engaged on 9.25.11 and our wedding is 8.11.12!

we had our wedding date picked out sometime mid march 2011.. booked our reception site april 2011 before being engaged too. we knew we wanted to get married! definitely werent dating a year before the engagement. and we’ll be married before we get to say “we met two years ago!”

but i get it. IT FEELS SO RIGHT. its just that when you know – you know!

Fiance and i also live together. i moved in OFFICIALLY (all my things and everything, last month) but i’ve been sleeping there & staying there every night since st.pattys day march. almost a year!

were both 24, me 25 in april and him 25 in june.

Post # 42
Member
4346 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I was Maid/Matron of Honor for a friend last year who got engaged after 7 months and married after a 3 month engagement. People were not very nice about it behind her back. I know I was jealous that I wasn’t engaged (I had been with now Fiance for almost 4 years) and it was weird for someone getting married to be asking me for relationship advice. But its been a year and theyre still happy, so who was I to judge? (They were 21 and 23 when they got married) I know part of they reason they got married so quickly was her visa was going to expire.

ETA: They were also eachother’s first bf/gf so maybe that was part of the rushing feeling? Idk. I know that most of the couples are young 20s, so maybe thats why it seems fast, but I know every friend I have that has gotten engaged in under a year has had comments made behind their backs. I don’t think it would happen as much in your 30s. But it is something you will probably have to put up with.

Post # 43
Member
720 posts
Busy bee

Not engaged yet so I can’t comment personally (though according to SO it’ll be 1.5 years after we started dating that we’ll get engaged), but I’ve got to admit I’ve felt the “you’re rushing into things” concerns with this one girl. I’ve been trying to fight it because I know it’s none of my business, but it’s not just the time thing that has me concerned (I’ve known couples that have met/dated/engaged/married in about the same time frame as them, but I felt a lot better about it their situations). In this girl’s case, she’s 21, still lives with her parents, is still in school, is in no way financially independent and has never and I mean *never* not been in a relationship since high school (we went to the same school, but she was a few grades behind since she’s younger). And she’s been through about 7 or 8 “serious” boyfriends since then. She bounced from one relationship to the other where the time span between each one was between a day and a month, and every single one was “THE ONE.” As in she would be writing facebook notes with fantasies about how she was going to get married to guy A and have four kids with him, then two months later she’d be writing the same kind of facebook note about guy B. Her longest relationship ever was just over a year, most of them were just a few months. With her current flavor of the month (I know that’s mean, but that’s how I see it), she met him late in the summer, was engaged mid fall and has an early spring wedding planned. I just can’t shake the feeling that this has “disaster” written all over it. She says it’s different this time but…it was “different” the last 8 times too…this might sound mean, but I think she’s more excited about the wedding and “being married” than the guy.

Meanwhile, I have another friend getting married this summer who met her fiance and was engaged 8 months later, but I feel much better about this one as they’re older, they’ll both be done with school before the wedding, are financially independent, mature, and though they both dated a good bit, they had very few relationships they mistook as “the one.” I guess it just depends on the couple.

Post # 44
Member
418 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Well, we were dating just about 6 months when he proposed. We were married Jan 7 and our 1 year dating anniversary would have been Jan 21. So we met, dated, engaged, married in less then a year. But we’re also in our mid-thirties…I wouldn’t necessarily suggest that for everyone.

Post # 45
Member
4346 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

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@Dizbee:  I have a friend who texts me every time she gets in a new relationship and she tells me that “he is THE ONE”. :/ I think were up to like 8 in the past 4 years?

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