(Closed) Who had NO SAY in the ring?

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Any of you letting SO handle the entire (choice of) ring?

    Yes - SO is doing it all alone

    Sort of - I gave him some hints and tips, but he is making the final decisions

    No - I wanted a say

  • Post # 17
    624 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2014

    I’m not a waiting bee anymore but my Fiance picked out the ring all on his own. He knew what cut I liked and that was all he needed! I never agonized over what he would pick because I knew it would be perfect and it is! Better than I could have picked out myself. I think if I had a say in my ring I would beat myself up over what I picked out or want to upgrade my ring. Instead I had no stress about my ring and will never change it because its perfect and my Fiance picked it especially for me!

    Post # 18
    916 posts
    Busy bee

    @mscuppycake:  I couldn’t answer your poll because I kinda stumbled upon my ring design by accident. I saw it in the store window, and it reminded me of a car part, so I took a photo of it and sent it to SO and brother as a joke. SO sent pack that he thought it was really pretty and the week after that we went in to the store and had an up close look at it fellow both fell  in love  with it. 

    Post # 19
    3172 posts
    Sugar bee

    DH asked if I wanted a say or if I wanted to be surprised. I wanted a say! I got a ruby in a pave setting. Had he picked it out himself, he would have chosen a diamond solitary with a plain band. Definitely not my style. 

    Post # 20
    2851 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2015

    I would’ve been fine with given some general suggestions, (ie metal type, not liking a certain cut of stone), but SO wanted my imput. He has a good track with buying jewelry, but he said he didn’t trust himself for something that cost $$$$. He said this would be the one time he screwed up lol. Personally, I think he would’ve done just fine, but now I’ll be getting a ring tha we created together, which is also nice ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 21
    97 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2015

    I gave Fiance a list of online picks, thinking he would choose from one of those. But I kept second-guessing myself and I finally said “If we’re going to get engaged, I’m going to let you pick it!” So a couple of months later he went to a jewelry store on Mother’s Day and picked something out, picked it up two days later, and proposed to me the day after that! We had discussed it at length before, but I was kind of all over the place. He knows I don’t like yellow gold anyway, and I knew he would get me a sapphire or an emerald because he thinks diamonds are boring (I would have taken just about anything as long as it was durable). So I got a sapphire solitaire with four little surprise diamonds on either side, and I love it so much. I really can’t imagine having anything different, and he so lovingly described why he chose the setting and the sapphire he did, so knowing he picked it out with me in mind made it even more special. And I’ve had a lot of people comment that it’s “so me.” So basically, he did a better job than I ever could have if I had more of a say in my ring.

    Post # 22
    2742 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2014 - Disney

    We picked the stone and ring together. I showed hubs lots of rings I liked but he went for my favorite and wouldnt let me tell him no. The biggest thing for me was no white diamond center stone, untreated, and conflict free.


    Post # 23
    6496 posts
    Bee Keeper

    @mscuppycake:  I wanted a very specific style (an antique-style cluster ring), and spent AGES hunting for what I was looking for. When I saw mine I was like ‘OMG, that is the EXACT ring I have been picturing!’, so I showed it to OH.

    If I hadn’t, he’d likely have taken the advice of friends and family and bought a solitaire on a plain band; which is the one style I really really did not want (closely followed by a triology). It was important to me to really love the ring, so it was important to me to have input.

    I know plenty of people who had no input and are very happy, but equally I know a lot of people who like me have very specific tastes (eg if my best friend ever got married she would likely go for a very small single diamond in a bezel setting, as she likes simple, small and understated, with a modern twist). Each to their own I think.

    Post # 24
    11226 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I really wanted to let him do it, so I just sent him links and pictures to rings that I liked, but he didn’t feel confident enough to do it himself. 

    Post # 25
    1670 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    View original reply
    @ceebree:  haha Sounds exactly like my guy! He was very easy to shop with.

    I do wonder what he might have chosen by himself though. I think a solitaire, he’s a classic guy and I usually wear fairly simple jewellery. I picked an antique style halo with details in the metal and 27 individual diamonds.

    I like solitaires too, but for the proportion to look “right” to me I would have wanted a carat size way out of the budget. (And I like halos better anyways. I would have wanted the bigger diamond in a halo and then it would have been too big.)

    What did you pick? Do you have any guesses what he might have chosen on his own? Mine won’t say. 

    Post # 26
    1038 posts
    Bumble bee

    I am already married, but…. husband knows diddlyshit about anything jewellery related. He actually asked me if it was alright for him to propose without a ring and I could pick it out after. Of course that is fine! Then one day we were at the mall and there was a huge sale sign outside of People’s Jewellers, I went in to browse, saw the ring I wanted, pretty much pointed to it and said ‘I want that one’, and that one is excatily what I got.

    I used to work at a local jewellery store, and I know that if I did not pick out my own ring, it would not be Hubby, but the lady (or gentelman) working at the store who would pick it out, it happens ALL the time.

    Post # 27
    722 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    the only “say” I had was that it was princess cut, but I made that well known ahead of time ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 28
    3099 posts
    Sugar bee

    View original reply
    @Fizzy8:  He’s totally clueless, so who knows what he would have picked on his own!  We make all our decisions together so I simply can’t picture him ring shopping alone.

    Here’s my original:

    And here’s my 5 year anniversary ring (MoissaniteCo eng869):

    NOTE this is NOT my finger.  My ring will be here in a few weeks.  This is Caris on BTD:

    Post # 29
    13094 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    DH knew that I liked white gold and prefered round diamonds to princess cut but other than that, I had zero input on my ring.  DH did it all by himself (he and I had never looked at a single ring together either in person or online) and he did a FANTASTIC job!  ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 30
    47 posts
    • Wedding: May 2014

    My Fiance and I looked at a bunch of rings the months before he bought mine. I showed him what I liked, but more tried to make it clear what I didn’t like (specifically the cuts).  In the end, he surprised me with a much bigger stone than I thought I was getting and a beautiful setting. I think men enjoy surprising us just a little bit ๐Ÿ™‚ 

    Post # 31
    667 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    My husband asked me what kind of ring I wanted, and I told him I wanted a surprise, because that’s how I’ve always dreamed of it happening and I didn’t want to put any pressure on him for something he couldn’t afford, etc. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen and I LOVE it.

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