(Closed) Who has has in-laws who don’t like them?

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Raises hand.

Dislike is not the word, however. Hate, loathe and despise me is more like it.

Post # 5
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@soon2bhis: I had to cut them completely out of my life. Hubby has also started the same…hasn’t seen his parents or spoken to them since July 1. It’s been since January for me.

I’m so sorry you are sad 🙁

Build your own little life with your DH!

Post # 7
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@soon2bhis: But the thing is, the only thing we ever used to fight about is his family. (Well, not fighting, but more like me crying and him saying “I know, baby, I know”.) We are so much happier now. And he says so all the time 🙂

Post # 8
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Me. We have a mutual loathing for each other, but the difference is that his mother is nice to my face and I feel like I would be just as fake as her if I made an effort to see her. So I haven’t spoken/ seen her since the wedding. My Darling Husband and I have stopped talking to members of his family that don’t add anything good to out lives (99%). He only talks to his mother over the phone for 5 minutes/ month. I wish we were all blessed with loving in-laws.

@soon2bhis:I know what you mean. I was always very polite, cordial, and dealt with their awful comments until the wedding. I don’t understand why people can hate perfectly nice people. I refuse to even call them my “in-laws” now. I call them DH’s family. brother, etc…

Post # 9
Member
2263 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Just_Squeeze: Your ‘fights’ sound like mine with my FH. It usually consists of me bursting into tears and him holding/agreeing with me that it’s not right. 

I deal with my future in laws by blocking them off my news feed and trying NOT to care one bit. Everytime I cry, I let it out for a minute or two and then just feel stupid because they certainly don’t cry over not knowing me. I’ve never had a real family and it’s been hard to watch FH pull away from his because they are a negative influence on our upcoming marriage. I wish it didn’t have to be this way! 

I suggest focusing on the future with your man! A life you can create together that is happy and respectful and loving and a home that is full of joy between the two of you. 

Post # 10
Member
5423 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2012

FI’s parents are divorced.  His father is fine, mother not so much.  When we were dating she told me I was ok for her son since I “looked white”.  I’m hispanic.

Post # 11
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

FIL’s don’t like me but I don’t like them either. Their own son and daughter have issues as well. They are crazy.

Post # 12
Member
2263 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MASPA: omg I got the SAME thing said to me. I’m Puerto Rican. :/ ugh. I find that so insulting. 

Post # 14
Member
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

@soon2bhis: No worries about the title. My mind read it right, my eye didn’t catch it

Post # 15
Member
5423 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2012

@SimplyChic11: pale hispanic powers activate!!  lol i couldnt help myself.

 

 

all of us have unfortunate circumstances but what is fortunate is how we all rise above them.

Post # 16
Hostess
11167 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

@soon2bhis: I think it is just hard for people to engage with those they don’t understand. I wouldn’t say “dislike” but perhaps can’t relate is a better term?

While his parents often include us they definitely don’t go to the same level of inclusion and involvement as they do with my Future Brother-In-Law and Future Sister-In-Law. While my Future Sister-In-Law is a very laid back, casual, somewhat introverted type of person I am the exact opposite and I think that his family has a hard time understanding and relating where I come from. I try not to take it personally, although sometimes it does get to me.

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