(Closed) Who is doing seating charts? Why? Guests of guests what to do with them?

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

In my area, if you are not invited to the wedding, you should not come. My venue will only seat a certain amount of people, and I am only going to have enough food for that number.

I am doing place cards for my reserved tables only. The only reason that I am doing it for those tables is because my caterer/coordinator asked me too. Otherwise people can set where they wish.

Post # 4
Member
1022 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

In my area, it would not be ok for people to invite extras to my wedding!  If someone rsvp’d extra people I would call them and explain that we just don’t have room to invite more people.

Yes, we are having escort cards.  I’ve been to weddings where it’s a free for all, and I hate trying to find a seat.  So awkward In My Humble Opinion. 

Post # 7
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I think escort cards are a good idea. We’re having assigned tables but not assigned seating specifically. We didn’t want people wandering around aimlessly wondering where they could sit. We are assigning two seats; my grandmother and Future Mother-In-Law. This is because we’re quite certain they’ll get along keep each other busy.

As for the etiquette question, in our area it’s extremely rude to invite someone to a party that isn’t yours. I suggest setting a deadline for RSVP’s a week or so before you absolutely need them and then calling the people on your guestlist if you haven’t received a response. At that point, you could explain space limitations, etc. i.e: “I would love to have your three friends along, but there simply isn’t room. I’m so sorry!”

Post # 9
Member
507 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I was worried about random extra guests showing up, because I know that sometimes happens in Puerto Rico. I even had a cousin of my mom’s tell my mom that even though she can’t go to the wedding she’ll send her grandson and his wife in her place — mind you, the grandson is someone who I haven’t seen in probably a decade and I had no idea he was married either! (I ended up not inviting this person btw). If the wedding/reception were in my hometown, I think it’d be pretty much certain that there would be extra people at the reception who weren’t invited, but since we’re getting married a bit far away from where I grew up I think we’ll be fine and no random extra people will show up uninvited. I’ve also told my mom to tell our relatives that the wedding is not “open invite” and that only the people named in the invitation are allowed to come, just in case.

We are doing escort cards to group people by table (in each table people get to choose where they want to seat). We’re doing this mostly because we have guests who don’t speak Spanish and guests who don’t speak English, so I’m grouping them more or less by language, so that people can talk amongst themselves at the table. For example, it’d be really bad if one single Spanish-speaker were to get stuck in a table full of Anglophones! So, right outside the reception area we’re going to have a table with the favors, and each favor will have a card with a person’s name and the name/number of the table where they’re suposed to sit at.

Post # 10
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Oh my!! I really hope that does not happen to me (or you either). That is VERY rude! I agree I do not want a bunch of strangers at my wedding. I mean honestly I cannot imagine going to a wedding that I was not invited to. People amaze me!

Post # 13
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Sounds like you earned that invite for sure and you did know the person! =) Is your wedding/reception in your hometown or an area where you know tons of people? Mine is, and I know that friends of mine have had some problems with random people showing up for the free alcohol and fun later in the night just because word gets out. I am a little worried about it, but I will walk up to them in my cute little wedding dress and tell them they can leave! Ha! =)

Post # 15
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Mine is invitation only as well.

It sounds like your mom will have the food under control…but what to do about the seating chart! That is tough when you there is possibility of extra guests that you are not expecting. I suppose that you could do a seating chart for the confirmed guests, and then have a couple extra tables for other people??? Not sure how that would work.

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