(Closed) Bridal Shower = Bachelorette? Plz Help*

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

In my family, a wedding and a bridal shower are the same thing.  Only the women that are invited to the wedding are invited to the shower with the exception of the groom.  He always comes to open gifts and things.  There was another post recently about whether the groom is there the whole time or not, and it just depends on what’s normal for you.  At the wedding/bridal shower, you get gifts off of your registry (no lingerie or gag gifts).

The bachlorette is where you get gifts like lingerie and things from your girlfriends (apparently some people do this for a bridal shower too).  My cousins typically limited it to their bridal parties and some other cousins/friends around their age.

There have been a few posts about this.  I think it’s mostly regional.  In my family, we don’t give gifts at weddings–just cash.  But a lot of people expect to get things off of their registries at their wedding, not their shower.  Just look at what’s normal in your area.

ETA: I forgot to add that guys can be invited to showers.  It’s a couples shower or a Jack and Jill shower.  I’ve never been to one though.

Post # 6
257 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

wedding or bridal shower (they are the same thing) is hosted by either your Maid/Matron of Honor or maybe an aunt or someone. only women are invited… and the guests range from your mom’s best friend, your aunts, your friends, your grandma, your future sister in laws/mother in law, etc.

your gifts are from your registry (so you get things like towels and knives and china) the point is for you to get some gifts while enjoying the company of women that want to make you feel special and celebrate your upcoming marriage.

the bachelorette party is for you and your bridesmiads/closest friends… this doesn’t usually include gifts except the gift of them paying to take you out for a night on the town. some bach parties include lingerie presents, but it isn’t standard.

if you are looking for a lingerie shower, tell your Maid/Matron of Honor that you specifically want a shower to recieve pretty things 🙂 the invite will indicate that!

Post # 7
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

A wedding shower and a bridal shower are the same. It is completely different from a bachelorette party. A bachelorette party is your last night  or your last night on the town before you get married to celebrate the end of being single. A bridal shower is hosted by your bridesmaids (no family members though except any bridesmaids) where guests shower you with gifts for your new household. Those are gifts for both you and your fiance. The bachelorette party is where any personal for-the-bride-only gifts are given.

Post # 8
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

Wow, I’ve never heard of gifts being exchanged at a bachelorette party. It’s basically the equivalent to a stag party for the girls. Sometimes it’s just a day at the spa & sometimes it’s an all out raging weekend in Vegas – it depends on the girl.

Bridal/Wedding Shower = same thing. Gifts you & your fiance pick out. It is generally only women but you can choose to have a “Jack & Jill” shower which would include men as well (personally, I don’t really see the difference between a Jack & Jill and an engagement party but who knows). Either way, make sure there’s a couple guys around to help lug the heavy stuff to & from the car. 😉

Like Boston Bee said – you might want to check with some of your girlfriends, a lot of these things have different meanings and traditions in different regions.

Post # 9
5966 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

There will be some regional difference, so let’s go to the historical roots of each celebration.

A bridal shower was historically a party that someone close to (but not a mother/sister) the bride would throw to help her get the things she needed to “set up house.”  A bride was expected to bring kitchen things/linnens/etc to the marriage and this was a way for her community of women to help her out.  Modern day, this definition has loosened quite a bit but showers still tend to have a strong focus on gifts and are often still attended by women only.  Showers are always thrown for you by someone else (a relative, friend, or bridesmaid, and these days it’s acceptable for a mom or sister to host as well) so you really don’t have to worry about it to much!  I’ve never been to a shower that’s been attended by the groom, but I’m sure that’s regional.  It’s also quite common to have several showers thrown for you by different people (for example, the grooms side, the brides side).

A bachelloret party isn’t traditional at all!  It’s actually a modern day adaption of the groom’s bachelor party.  The traditional bachelor party was the man’s “last night of freedom” and so things like male bonding experiences, strippers, and booze are pretty typical.  Women typically do the girly equivelent.  Often times bachelorette parties don’t include gifts at all since each attendee usually pays her own way, but when gifts are part of the party they usually tend to be of the naughty variety.

For both events typically only people who are invited to the wedding get the invite.  For the bachelorette it’s normally only the BMs and young friends of the bride who attend.

Post # 10
711 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

For my friend, we are having a bridal shower from like 630-930pm and then going OUT for the Bachelorette Party. Since people are coming from all over, it’s easier to do it this way, plus only her Mom is coming (no other family, bc they are having another family shower in her hometown later) so her Mom will come for the shower part and then chill out while we go out and get our dance on!

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