(Closed) Who is staying at your house for your wedding?

posted 8 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
Member
837 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Let others deal with their own financial situation, meaning if they feel they can afford a hotel, then they can.  I think you are really going to regret having all those people in your house.  That’s what hotel blocks are for lol.  If they mention money trouble then offer, but if they think they can handle it, let them dictate that.

Hope this helps!

Post # 5
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

The only person staying here is his mom, everyone else has to get hotel rooms or stay with family, I dont want a chaotic house when I need to relax before the wedding, when family is around there’s always drama stirring in the air

Post # 6
Member
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I wouldn’t be making accomodations for anyone who is close enough to drive within 2-3 hours…that’s not bad at all!  If they live that close and want to get a hotel, I think that responsibility should be on them.

However, that being said, we are putting up a lot of folks who are flying in from 2500 miles away.  I just can’t ask them to get a hotel room, on top of airfare, to come see us get married!  So between my fiance’s one extra room (2 guests), my brother’s extra room (2 guests), and my parents’ extra room (1 guest & baby) and travel trailer (2 guests)…we’re doing what we can for those who are coming from out of town. 

But those are for our SUPER close friends, who are probably like your family.  I would draw a very clear line somewhere on who you plan to put up and who you don’t.  But honestly, if you’re starting to stress about it now, go with your instinct!  You don’t want to be super stressed that week because of accomodating family!

Post # 7
Member
14183 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

We have 5 bedrooms and our house was pretty damn full. My parents were downstairs (they live 4ish hours away), my bridesmaid and her mom stayed in the guest room (we have a twin bed and a twin air mattress in there) i had 3 other bridesmaids stay over. I had a queen air mattress also, so two of them slept on that and one girl slept on the couch.

Full house, lemme tell ya. But, it was okay. My parents came in town WEdnesday with my aunt and her boyfriend (who i made stay in a hotel…i wasn’t keen on her boyfriend sleeping over–i’ve never met him). It was too much honestly. THey were stressing me the hell out, getting in my face, and treating the time like “hey let’s hang out!” versus me having wedding stuff to do. So Thursday night Darling Husband and I spent the day doing stuff we needed to do (pick up tuxes, etc) and had a nice dinner, stayed in a nice hotel, and had date night. We let everyone just chill at our place, lol. You may want to consider that–it was a wonderful alone night. I came back refreshed, not stressed, relaxed. If i was home, i woud’ve found wedding stuff to do. Then, Friday, after the rehearsal, Darling Husband went and stayed with his mom and after the rehearsal is when all but one of the bridesmaids came over and we all hung out, got ready at my place, etc.

5 br, two baths, about 2,000 square feet. How many ppl? I lost count. Full house for sure, but it wasn’t cramped or irritating except for the fact that I needed to do stuff, so we left Thursday and had date night. Which we only did because Darling Husband flew in town on Wednesday because we were LDR and didn’t want to spend ALL the time leading up to our wedding (when we hadn’t seen each other for a couple months) with other people.

Post # 8
Member
624 posts
Busy bee

Where are you staying the night of the wedding?

I realize you want to be nice and include everyone but you’ll want alone time and with the house filled to capacity, it won’t happen.  Maybe offer to let people stay with you but not the night before and not the night of. 

My thinking was similar to yours and in the end no one was ‘allowed’ to stay at the house.  I say allow because we had a huge issue with DH’s side the year before about who could and who couldn’t stay, when really everyone could have stayed but chose not to…anyways, not the point of this post.  No one ended up staying with us and I am so glad no one did either.  Maybe you could offer to pay for your parents hotel 1 night that way it’s not so much of a burden? 

Post # 10
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

We’re having my parents, my sister, her husband, and my niece. Oh and my parents TWO DOGS. Plus we already have a dog. So. That adds up to… 6 people and 3 dogs. Thank god we are a close family and drama free!! It might be crowded, but they are flying in and I’m going to need help anyways. Fiance and I are not staying there on our wedding night though ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 12
Member
624 posts
Busy bee

Ottawa brings up a good point…drama!  If your family is full of drama you won’t want to be around it any more than you have to. 

Post # 13
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I keep having moments where I want to offer our house for people to stay at while they are here for the wedding.  But the last thing I want to do is to be entertaining guest while I am stressing over details or needing breathing time. 

Can you have just your parents or just his parents?  Maybe both but cut it off there!

Post # 14
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

Hmm.. you need to somehow reserve that guest room for your parents since they are helping financially and are organizing the brunch. The most gracious thing you can do is give FI’s parents your bedroom when they arrive and move yourselves to the guest bedroom, then when your parents come give them the guest bedroom and move to a hotel (which will only be like 1 night early, right?) That way none of them have to pay for a hotel room and you and Fiance get your space which you were going to get anyway.

We are Out of Town ourselves, so Fiance and I are staying at my parents house two nights before the wedding with one of my Out of Town BM’s then moving to a hotel the night before. So it isn’t too complicated, but I’m sure my parents are going to be paying for some peoples hotel rooms just to avoid them staying at their house!

Post # 16
Bee
2362 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden

We are on “no guests in our house the wedding weekend” because we might just need to get away and relax at some point!  I think it’s very generous that you want everyone to stay with you, but I don’t think it’s expected (or should be expected).

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