Post # 1
I am having a destination wedding and am not sure who pays for what. It seems like I already footed alot of costs for the wedding party: $20 for flip flops from dessy to match their dresses, $100 for a coach wristlet for a gift, their bouquets cost $40 each. But then again, I know people spent alot of money to go down there… although I had to spend money on plane tickets and hotels for their weddings (just wasnt at an all inclusive resort, it was back in my home state).
I am just wondering who pays for the hair? The salon down there charges $60 a person and I have 6 Bridesmaid or Best Man so it adds up. My hair is included in the package so I planned on getting mine done regardless. I stood in 3 of the girls weddings before, 2 paid for it (but one is very wealthy) and the other made us pay for it.
We just decided to spend an extra $4000 to have a private party down there too (otherwise they would just have a supper in a shared restaurant)… And decided to do gift bags for each room so we are getting a little overwhelmed by costs!
Post # 3
- Wedding: June 2010 - Ceremony - First United Methodist Church; Reception - My parents' house!
I think if you’re “making” them get their hair done, then you should pay the costs. If you’re just having it as an option to them, then I’d say it’s okay for them to pay.
Post # 4
I agree with scissors. If it is something you really, really want, you should pay. If you are fine with them doing their own hair, give them the option and have them pay.
Post # 5
None of us went to a hair salon, we all did our own hairs.
Post # 6
My mom is paying for my sisters and I to have ours done, other than that, it’s optional, so my girls can pay for themselves.
Post # 7
I agree with scissors. If you’re requiring it, you should pay, if you’re just giving them the option and setting up appointments they should pay.
Also, the fact that you pointed out that you paid for their bouquets…well…..that just left me kind of speechless.
Post # 8
I did my own hair when I was my best friend’s maid of honor, and I did the other bridemaid’s hair as well, I’m not a stylist, I just took my time and did my research. If they want to save the cash, they can figure it out..
Post # 9
lol. I didn’t mean I would ever make them pay for their bouquets… I am just making the point that I have spent a bit of money on them. Jez! relax!
Post # 10
I offered hair and makeup to my bridesmaids as an option but also offered to pay for it as a gift. I didn’t want to make them feel they had to do it. I also arranged to get our nails done but they will pay for that. Other than that my girls are buying thier dresses and paying for thier room. I’m putting together some nice gifts so hopefully they feel it equals out.
Post # 11
I’m also having a destination wedding. I’m doing the Out of Town bags for each room etc and i’m buying my bridesmaids dresses, shoes, gifts to. To be honest i haven’t thought about their hair. I may offer to do it myself to save some money. (i’m not a stylist but OK at doing hair). You never know they may even say to you they will pay for their hair themselves? Or maybe as your having 6 they may just do each others? How did you feel when you were asked to pay for your hair at your friends wedding? Go with what you feel comfortable with and can afford!
Post # 12
I don’t think paying for their bouquets counts as a thing “for them”. You’re getting them bouquets because they’re bridesmaids….the fact that you chose $40 bouquets, well, shouldn’t count ‘against’ your bridesmaids. everybody spends a lot of money on their weddings =]. real flowers are ‘spensive.
Since it’s a destination wedding, is your vibe more casual? If so, you okay with them having loose, casual hair, nothign too formal? If so, just let them know that, well, there IS a salon there if they want to get their hair done, but if not, you’re totally ok with them saving their money and doing it themselves cuz you know they’ll look gorgeous regardless!
but i always felt like the bride should take care of their bridesmaids. nobody likes to go be part of a wedding, spend a ton of money on hotels, airfare, take time off work, buy a dress, etc, and then stress about doing their own hair! it’s nice to be pampered and know you look pretty, too, that day!
Post # 13
I agree with ejs4y8…I wanted to spoil them–regardless of what they did or did not do for their own weddings. We had a destination wedding also and we paid for all of the lodging and food and drinks for our bridal party; I treated the girls to manis/pedis; and my husband treated the guys to day of golf and paid for part of the tuxedos b/c they were more than we had expected. I did not pay for hair, but gave them the option of not doing it.
Post # 14
Sounds like people are pretty much in agreement and I agree to. If you are requiring them to get their hair done, then you should pay for it. If it’s just an option and they can do it if they want to, they can pay. That’s what my bride is doing. I said I WANTED to get my hair done so I’m assuming that I will be paying for it. Same for my nails – she’s doing her and I’m going to go with her, but I certainly don’t have to!