(Closed) Who pays for gas on a road trip?

posted 5 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
1152 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@texasbee:  Normally you split that sort of thing.  From my experience.

Post # 4
13251 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would.  In the grand scheme of things, $200 isn’t that much.  If you can afford it and they can’t, why not just pay it to keep the peace?

Post # 5
2959 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We take turns.

Post # 6
1460 posts
Bumble bee

@texasbee:  What an awkward situation, sorry you’re so conflicted about it. I think I see your viewpoint and it does suck to feel like you’re being taken advantage of financially. When I’m riding with someone, I think it’s always courteous to offer gas money and even expect to contribute to the tank. Never with my parents before but this seems like a special circumstance.

While I don’t think it’s fair for them to expect you to cover all of the gas for the trip, I guess it doesn’t really always boil down to principle when dealing with loved ones. If you have the money and it doesn’t hurt you to pay for gas and you know they’re strapped…I say pay it. If you and your Darling Husband need the money just as badly, offer to split it.

Post # 7
4770 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@texasbee:  it seems like an awkward conversation to have.  I would suspect that if they have the money to stay in a hotel and ski then they would have 100 to split the gas.

I’d prob not say anything to keep the peace, but it would rub me the wrong way.

Reminds me of my SIl who was taken aback after we asked her to pay 50% of gas costs after Darling Husband and I drove her ass and her Boyfriend or Best Friend from NYC to Niagara and back in our car!  People be crazy. 

Post # 8
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

@texasbee:  I’ve always just split gas between whoever is going.. If you all can’t really afford the $200 I’d tell your Darling Husband to talk to his parents about splitting it. Or even paying for one fill up there and one fill up back.

Personally I’d stay out of that kind of thing with my IL’s and send him to do it lol.

Post # 9
1460 posts
Bumble bee

@abbie017:  +1.

Reminds me of one of my favorite quotes from Sex in the City…money is fluid “someone needs it, you give it. you need it, you take it.

Post # 10
1868 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@texasbee:  In my relationship, my fiancé and I would pay the gas on behalf of our in-laws. We wouldn’t let them pay, but that’s just us. We’re well off financially and paying for gas for a 6 hour trip won’t hurt us in any way. Especially for either set of parents. 

ETA: If it was a road trip with friends, we’d split it. 

Post # 11
2837 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@texasbee:  Hmmmmmm weird scenario.

If I were going on a road trip with my parents, they’d be paying for gas- even if I wa driving, cuz that’s just how they are.

If you guys are ALL paying your own way for the hotel/ski passes/etc…..I don’t know why they’d expect that you should pay for ALL the gas.

If they were paying for your hotel rooms and/or ski passes, I’d say why not.


Since the IL’s are having financial problems- I’d ask your Darling Husband if he wants to pay for the gas in order to help out with his parents situation or if he’s just paying it because mom and dad said so.

If it’s something where your husband really WANTS to help his parents out, I don’t know how you can argue that.

That being said, if FIL/MIL are having such horrible financial troubles, why are they taking a vaca?

And lastly- do they really make you pay them gas $$ to dirve to dinner??!?!?!


My IL’s are not well off, but the few times Father-In-Law has asked Darling Husband to run an errand for him (FIL usually works out of town, so sometimes he’ll need something done locally while he’s away, and Mother-In-Law doesn’t like to drive anywhere that’s ourside of thier smaller hometown)- so when Father-In-Law asks Darling Husband to run an errand for him, he’ll pay him nicely for gas to do that errand, even though I know Darling Husband would do it for nothing, happily.

It’s a small gensture on FIL’s part to show how he appreciates DH’s time/willingness to help out.

Post # 12
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

They are obviously strapped for cash.  I would either pay or not go on the trip.  

Post # 13
9675 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Normally I split gas when I go on a trip with friends.

Since you are splitting everything else, I would think you would split the gas.

But if they’re really that short on money and you do want to go on the trip with them (and can afford it), I’d just suck it up and pay for the gas.  Sort of as a nice thing to do for family who is struggling. 

Post # 14
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

If I were going with my parents, I’d pay.  If I were going with my in-laws, they’d insist on paying for some, husband would fight to pay for it himself.  If I were going with friends, we’d probably split it or just each of us grab a few swipes at the pump.  All depends on your relationship, your knowledge of their financial situation, etc. 

Post # 15
8823 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

if my mom drove, she would never ask Darling Husband and I for gas money.  if Darling Husband drove, he wouldn’t ask me or my mom for gas money either.

eventually it all comes out in the wash.


but if you know they are having financial difficulties and this would help them out, you were planning to go there anyway, so just refill their tank when you hit empty. 

Post # 16
2716 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I haven’t been road-tripping with my parents since I was in college, but when we go with our friends, we usually split gas 50/50 regardless of who is driving.  However, before H and I got married we’d sometimes split it where on person pays for gas, but the other covers the food/snacks and tolls.  So maybe you could suggest something like that.  You and your H will pay for the gas, and our ILs can cover snacks, tolls/parking, and any food you buy along the way.

Otherwise I’d probably just bite the bullet and pay for gas since his parents are more strapped for cash.  It’s rude they demanded it, but in the grand scheme of things it’d be better to pay and not fight.

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