Post # 1
Ok, so my sister (MOH) is planning my bachelorette party. The guest list is all of my bridal party and 3 of my friends here who are NOT involved in the wedding other than being invited. My sister called me the other day talking about limo prices and said, if everyone pitches in it will only cost $xxx per person. I told her that sounded great but I do not want the 3 friends NOT involved in the wedding to pay anything. She said that EVERY bachelorette party she’s ever gone to (BP or not) she has always pitched in financially for transportation.
Personally, I feel like it’s rude to ask someone not involved in the wedding party to “pay” to go to a party. I understand 100% that the Bridal Party would pay (it’s a party they are all throwing for the bride) but friends of the bride that are NOT in the wedding party….I just feel like it’s rude. Every person I’ve spoken to about it does not think so though. I even had a blunt convo with one of the girls about it and she said she wouldn’t be offended and actually expected to pay something when I was talking to her a few weeks back about wanting a limo.
So bee’s what’s your opinion? Would you be offended? What have bachelorette parties looked like for you (financially), whether a Bridal Party member or just a guest?
Post # 3
If I go to a B-party I expect to pay an equal amount (within reason)
I would expect the plan to be run by everone first to be sure they can afford it however.
Post # 4
Every bachelorette party I’ve been invited to (in the bridal party and not) and my own, each person paid their own way except the bride. I think it’s kind of rude to tell your bridal party to pick up the tab for your friends. Let your bridal party decide who pays what, it’s not really your decision since it’s being thrown for you.
Post # 5
@redhead46: good point. I feel like, if I decide I don’t like the idea of my 3 friends having to pay, I just wouldn’t invite them and it would be a Bridal Party only party. It’s definitely NOT fair to have them pay more to pick up the slack from the 3 not paying.
Post # 6
Mine is this weekend… My Maid/Matron of Honor organized it, but everyone splits the cost except the bride… Your Maid/Matron of Honor should also omit you from planning, especially when it comes to finance or budget or else the guilt may creep up on you like it already has… Relax…. All the attendees know the drill… I have one guest who tried to short change the cost bc she wasn’t going to participate in one portion… We’re talking she shorted her $10 which was wrong!
Post # 7
I would not want to pay for a limo for your 3 other friends. This should not be a financial burden on your BMs.
Post # 8
Agree w all the other posters. Everyone pitches in minus bride.
Post # 9
Oh god honey, your BM’s do not pay for all of your friends.
Post # 10
@redhead46: +1. There’s nothing wrong with expecting your friends to chip in for their own transportation. Bachelorette isn’t really like a formal hosted party, it’s more like a girl’s night out on the town. When you think from that perspective, it’s really not rude to ask them to pay their own way and you probably wouldn’t think twice of it for a normal girls night out.
Post # 11
Thanks so much for all the input everyone. Just to clarify, I would NOT ask my Bridesmaids to pay the way for the other 3 girls. The option was invite them and ask them to pay their half for the limo (which I wasn’t sure I liked) or DON’T invite them. I was never considering having them come along for the ride and my BM’s foot their part of the bill. Sorry that i didn’t really explain that well.
I’m only concerned because these 3 girls don’t know my sister at all and I don’t want them getting offended in any way since I’m NOT a part of the planning.
Thanks again, this was a lot of help =)
Post # 12
I have never been to a Bachelorette party either. But for mine, everyone is expected to pay their own way. Even the girls not in my wedding party that are just invited to the wedding will have to pay their own way. We’re not doing anything fancy or getting transportation, it’s just each girl for themself.
Post # 13
I think the 3 that are not participating should still pay, yes they are not going to be at the wedding, but they will be in the limo at the bachlorette party. And that isn’t fair for the rest that will be in the wedding to be paying for the 3 that wont be.
Post # 14
Everyone but the bride should pay. The Bridal Party should not be paying extra for the 3 non-BP girls to be going out with you!
Post # 15
I had issues with my bachelorette party too. My cousin is my Maid/Matron of Honor and her husband is the best man, so they already have a lot on their plate. She had called my sister and told her that she could pay for the party but not a limo, she was wondering if my sister would be the designated driver. My sister told me and now I am giving my sister the money to rent the limo and we are not telling my Maid/Matron of Honor. She does so much and she would just feel bad if she knew I was doing it.