Post # 1
We just got engaged earlier this month and just started talking about our budget. My Fiance and his mom is getting the idea that my parents will be paying for the wedding…from the old tradition i guess… but i really thought it was going to be 50/50 or depending on the number of the guests from each side. My bro and sis are married and they both did 50/50 on their weddings with their in-laws. What is right? Please let me know who is/paid for your wedding. From everyone that I know, they have all split the costs of the wedding with the in-laws and did not expect the father of the bride to cover all the wedding costs. What do you girls think?
Post # 3
It depends on the financial situation of everyone involved. My parents are paying for about 15% of the reception, Fiance and I are paying for 85%, and FI’s mom is paying for the rehearsal dinner.
Rather than having them contribute towards one item (say rehearsal dinner or open bar), just try to get an idea of your overall budget based on actual dollar amounts they’re estimated to contribute.
Post # 4
We are paying 50/50 for all the wedding stuff. I am paying on my own for my dress/shoes and other stuff. He is paying for his tux and stuff. My girls are getting their own dresses. The only thing i wanted and could not get him to agree with me on is videographer, so i am paying for that myself too.
Post # 5
Our parents are from the same area of WI, so it was the norm that his parents would offer to pay for alcohol and the rehearsal dinner, and my parents would pay for anything else they didn’t want us to have to pay for. I feel really fortunate that they are all being so generous. We are paying for the photography, favors, and some of the decor.
Post # 6
My parents are paying for about 50% and my Fiance and I are covering the rest, as far as we know. His parents haven’t mentioned anything to us, and his dad has been out of work for a year, so we’re not really expecting anything from them 🙂
Post # 7
My parents are paying for everything except for part of the rehearsal dinner that his parents are paying for. My FIL’s believe in tradition of the brides parents paying and I hate it. FIL’s make way more money than mine and haven’t even offered – it makes me so angry. My parents won’t take any $ from me.
Post # 8
Yes, tradition is that the bride’s family pays for the wedding, and the groom/groom’s family pays for the honeymoon and the bride’s wedding rings. But these days, it is common that the couple pays for most of everything. It really just depends on how much people want to contribute.
Post # 9
I think that by default the bride/groom pay, and if the parents would like to chip in they do. My parents are paying about 1/3 and we’re paying 2/3. Groom’s parents are paying zilch.
Post # 10
In our case, the Office Groom and I are paying for most of the wedding ourselves. Our parents have helped with a few things (Photographer, venue, my dress), but since this is the first big thing we’ve ever had to budget for together we really wanted this to be something we did as a couple.
Post # 11
I agree, it depends on the financial situation of everyone. My Fiance and I are paying for the wedding 100% ourselves. Both of our moms are single moms, and Future Mother-In-Law just got laid off, and my mom does not work, she just flips houses/has investments. We immediately decided we wouldn’t accept or ask for any help with the wedding. Totally depends on how everyone wants to/can contribute
Post # 12
Every wedding $$ is different these days. We are very fortunate and our wedding is being paid for in its traditional ways. My parents are paying for the wedding and FH’s parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner, Out of Town guest welcome reception (our wedding is kind of a destination and his parents wanted to do this..) morning after wedding brunch. FH’s parents also gave us $$ towards our honeymoon.
Post # 13
Fiance and I are paying for nearly all of it. We set up a budget that we felt we could afford. Later his parents offered to pay for the flowers and rehersal dinner. They believed that was traditional. I wasn’t about to tell them that it was only traditional for them to pay for my bouquet. :). My mom’s not paying for anything as she really just can’t afford to.
My feeling always has been that if you both have jobs and can afford to, you should pay for it and if the parents offer to pay for something all the better.
Post # 14
I agree with PPs who said that it depends on the finances involved. I know in our case, we paid for the wedding ourselves, with his dad covering the rehearsal dinner (BBQ picnic at a park) and my parents paying for my dress as their wedding gift to us.
Post # 15
we paid for the wedding, my parents paid for my dress and the honeymoon, and my Mother-In-Law paid for the rehearsal dinner.