(Closed) Who pays for the wedding? 50/50 anyone?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
721 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

It depends on the financial situation of everyone involved.  My parents are paying for about 15% of the reception, Fiance and I are paying for 85%, and FI’s mom is paying for the rehearsal dinner.

Rather than having them contribute towards one item (say rehearsal dinner or open bar), just try to get an idea of your overall budget based on actual dollar amounts they’re estimated to contribute.

Post # 4
Member
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We are paying 50/50 for all the wedding stuff. I am paying on my own for my dress/shoes and other stuff. He is paying for his tux and stuff. My girls are getting their own dresses. The only thing i wanted and could not get him to agree with me on is videographer, so i am paying for that myself too. 

 

Post # 5
Member
655 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Our parents are from the same area of WI, so it was the norm that his parents would offer to pay for alcohol and the rehearsal dinner, and my parents would pay for anything else they didn’t want us to have to pay for. I feel really fortunate that they are all being so generous. We are paying for the photography, favors, and some of the decor.

Post # 6
Member
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

My parents are paying for about 50% and my Fiance and I are covering the rest, as far as we know. His parents haven’t mentioned anything to us, and his dad has been out of work for a year, so we’re not really expecting anything from them 🙂

Post # 7
Member
790 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

My parents are paying for everything except for part of the rehearsal dinner that his parents are paying for. My FIL’s believe in tradition of the brides parents paying and I hate it. FIL’s make way more money than mine and haven’t even offered – it makes me so angry. My parents won’t take any $ from me.

Post # 8
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Yes, tradition is that the bride’s family pays for the wedding, and the groom/groom’s family pays for the honeymoon and the bride’s wedding rings. But these days, it is common that the couple pays for most of everything. It really just depends on how much people want to contribute.

Smile

Post # 9
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

I think that by default the bride/groom pay, and if the parents would like to chip in they do. My parents are paying about 1/3 and we’re paying 2/3. Groom’s parents are paying zilch.

Post # 10
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

In our case, the Office Groom and I are paying for most of the wedding ourselves.  Our parents have helped with a few things (Photographer, venue, my dress), but since this is the first big thing we’ve ever had to budget for together we really wanted this to be something we did as a couple. 

Post # 11
Member
4159 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I agree, it depends on the financial situation of everyone.  My Fiance and I are paying for the wedding 100% ourselves.  Both of our moms are single moms, and Future Mother-In-Law just got laid off, and my mom does not work, she just flips houses/has investments.  We immediately decided we wouldn’t accept or ask for any help with the wedding.  Totally depends on how everyone wants to/can contribute

Post # 12
Member
2058 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Every wedding $$ is different these days.  We are very fortunate and our wedding is being paid for in its traditional ways. My parents are paying for the wedding and FH’s parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner, Out of Town guest welcome reception (our wedding is kind of a destination and his parents wanted to do this..) morning after wedding brunch.  FH’s parents also gave us $$ towards our honeymoon.

Post # 13
Member
384 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Fiance and I are paying for nearly all of it.  We set up a budget that we felt we could afford.  Later his parents offered to pay for the flowers and rehersal dinner.  They believed that was traditional.  I wasn’t about to tell them that it was only traditional for them to pay for my bouquet.  :).  My mom’s not paying for anything as she really just can’t afford to. 

My feeling always has been that if you both have jobs and can afford to, you should pay for it and if the parents offer to pay for something all the better.

Post # 14
Member
1120 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2009

I agree with PPs who said that it depends on the finances involved. I know in our case, we paid for the wedding ourselves, with his dad covering the rehearsal dinner (BBQ picnic at a park) and my parents paying for my dress as their wedding gift to us.

Post # 15
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

we paid for the wedding, my parents paid for my dress and the honeymoon, and my Mother-In-Law paid for the rehearsal dinner.

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