Post # 1
**Disclaimer: This is a rhetorical question, no need to call out anyone**
So I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately about negativity and how it spreads. This has spawned from an incident that we recently had here at work and has developed into more thought after seeing the way some members of the bee have been acting.
I’ll tell you what happened at work. We had three new employees join my office at the beginning of this summer. One of those employees is a sour, negative woman who always has something to complain about (do you know the type?). She constantly mentioned the negative aspects of just about anything. The weather sucks, I hate our manager, My shifts aren’t as good as the other girls, etc. etc. etc. The other two girls are bright, happy employees who leave their complaints at home (as they should). Well over the past 3 months of their probationary period I have come to use the term “poisoning the well” A LOT. To make a long story short this employee’s negative attitude spread to one of the happy girls first and then eventually to the other. Her complaints about management, office policies, over-time, etc. soon became the complaints of all three of our new staff. SHE POISONED THE WELL. Or in other terms her negativity spread like a disease that was hard to control. Needless to say, now that the probabtionary period is over we’ve had to let all three employees go because we couldn’t move forward after all that damage had been done.
My point in sharing this story is to convey my concern about all the negativity that has been “infecting” our weddingbee community. The well has been poisoned. There are so many women on here that think it’s okay to attack each other or say completely uncalled for things. I think we need to all step back and take a breather. Our well has been poisoned and it’s time to change the water!
Please join in with me on speading positivity if you believe my words to be true. Positive thoughts, words, and posts can be achieved if we all take a look around and realize that this website is becoming the exact opposite of what it should be. We’re here to support each other and to share ideas in an exciting time in our lives. Leave your negativity at the door please! Didn’t your mother ever tell you, “if you have nothing nice to say than don’t say it at all?”
I know I for one am not going to continue to hang around and listen to this garbage. So please let’s all start spreading some positivity or soon this website will have lost it’s special meaning. 🙂
Post # 3
I wish there was a “like” button on here!
Well said! 🙂
Post # 4
Agree x100!!! BEE positive!
Post # 5
I agree. There are tons of other wedding websites, but this is the only one I frequent because, quite frankly, the others are scary. I like our postive outlook on things (in general) and that we take the time to think before we post, so we don’t inadvertently hurt someone’s feelings (in general). That’s what sets weddingbee apart from The Knot and other boards.
Post # 6
*standing ovation* The only reason I signed up for WeddingBee was because of what an amazing, wonderful, and FRIENDLY community. I lurked for quite awhile before joining because of how nasty other online message boards can be, and I didn’t want to be involved in that! It’s still not nearly as bad as some others, but it is a lot less welcoming than it was when I joined.
Post # 7
There was episode about this on This American Life! One negative employee or team member – someone who’s a lazy slacker, depressed/pessimistic, or mean/trying to be funny and failing – can slow productivity of the whole team, as others pick up that one team member’s characteristics. STUDIES PROVE that one bad apple can spoil the bunch, even when you’re trying to be positive and rise above it all.
Post # 8
we were having a discussion similar to this earlier this morning if you wish to hop over and read. More about moderation, but in general about the less than stellar attitude that some bees have had lately
Post # 9
Touche…thanks for posting this!
this is not the place to bring people down ladies! we are supposed to be supportive and encouraging during this stressful time. “if you have nothing good to say, then dont say it” no need to go back and forth bickering at each other.
Post # 10
Whever a bunch of negative posts pop up, I just mosey on over to the decor tab and find posts of girls asking for decor/ inspiration help. Thats one of the main reasons I’m still on this site! I love weddings! 🙂
Post # 11
At my old job, one position in sales management was cursed. It seemed like every single person who took that position had a horrible attitude – I hate this job, they don’t pay me enough, etc.
That positiion ran out every other person in the sales department, including me. I quit, and now work somewhere where everyone has a good attitude, and I am a much happier person.
Post # 13
Thanks ladies! I’m glad you agree. I just feel like this is a place to come to cheer me up or give me inspiration. I don’t want to see people ragging on each other, calling each other down, or just being plain ignorant. It needs to stop!
As a Canadian (and I’m sure most Americans can agree) we are blessed to live in North America. We live in democratic nations that promote free-speech, but that also draw emphasis on the importance of human dignity, human decency, and respect. We all need to give ourselves a slap on the wrist and start being more posivitve and supportive…after all that is what the weddingbee is here for. If people want to have more heated debate than please join a political or special interests group…weddingbee is not the right medium for you.
Post # 14
I totally agree and was thinking about starting a similar post! It saddens me that bees can’t express their opinions on things without being attacked or the recipient of snarky posts.
Hear hear to positive vibes!
Post # 15
I wish I could *like* this thread!
Post # 16
I think sometimes people forget that there are nice (or at least neutral) ways to express negative or differing opinions. I am not supportive of censoring, and I really appreciate being able to voice my opinion, even if it is not in agreement with others. But I try to phrase my opinion in a polite way.