(Closed) Who should wear boutonnieres?

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1061 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

Most fashion guides say either pocket squares or bouts, but not both because it gets a bit busy. 

If you’re not doing corsages for the women, don’t do bouts for the guys. You’re honoring those people by giving them flowers, so it would be strange to honor the men and not the women.

(PS — my mom didn’t want a corsage for the very same reason!)

Post # 4
21 posts
  • Wedding: April 2009

I didn’t want traditional corsages either, even when my florist told me that they can use magnets instead of pins… Just didn’t want any part of it. Instead, I’m doing DIY wristlets — with silk flowers and ribbon. Not sure if that would fit the vibe of your wedding, but it’s a corsage alternative to consider.

Post # 5
2640 posts
Sugar bee

My mom had a nosegay (I think that’s what it is.)  It was just a little tiny bouquet.  I think she actually appreciated not having something awkward pinned on her.  Also, she liked having something to hold on to.

Post # 6
2640 posts
Sugar bee

Also,  based on Lillindy’s pictures, I don’t think bouts and squares look too busy together.  IMO.

Post # 7
752 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I think pocket squares are very chic, and could match the ribbon on the maids’ bouquets rather than matching the boutonnieres to the flowers! Plus, sites like Esquire.com and GQ.com have lots of great suggestions on cool folds to dress up your pocket square. I also think monogramming the squares instantly makes them into a very classy groomsman’s gift! 🙂

In terms of who should get a boutonniere, if you are doing tons of flowers, generally dads, ushers, and other "important males" would get them, whomever they may be. That could include junior groomsmen and candle lighters, if you’re having them. If you’d like to scale back, no one really HAS to have them. It’s up to you to choose how you’d like to distinguish your special guys. 

Though, I have to say, I don’t think it would look too awkward to have boutonnieres on the guys if the women don’t have flowers. 🙂

I hope that helps! Good luck!

Post # 8
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

I’m doing a small bouquet for my mom and Future Mother-In-Law.  For bouts, we are doing them for Fiance, my dad (his dad is deceased), grandfather, groomsmen and if we have a male reader, him, too.  We are having at least one female reader and will do a flower pin (ie female bout) for her and also for our grandmothers.

Post # 9
754 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

We had our florist attach magnets instead of pins to the corsages.  I thought that worked out well.

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