Post # 1
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
So, Vow Renewal is this week. Finally, its almost over and we are going to move on to the next step (moving to a new country 
) . Husband and I had friends over and there is this one guy who for some reason comes. He tends to get drunk and belligerent in our home and tells inappropriate jokes. For example, one time he made a racist joke. I didn’t laugh and then just asked “How is that funny?” he got red and tried to explain it but totally failed. He doesn’t really hang out with my husband and for some reason sits on my couch and plays video games. He isn’t really my friend or my husband’s..he just shows up but I have to be polite so I try to be nice. Anyways, a friend of mine asked to see the gown. I happily showed her and we were talking. The guy picks up my wedding shoes and walks to the kitchen to where my husband and his friends were at and asked them “What do you think she (meaning me) would do if I burned these wedding shoes.” Everyone gets really quiet because he was drunk and the way he was acting..I think he would have did it. My husband said “She would kill you.” One of the guys says “Why would you even joke about that?”
Now let me explain about this guy. He is recently divorced after being married for 8 months to a girl he only knew for a month before she got pregnant. He makes bad remarks about women and military wives in general (he implies that they are moochers who don’t have jobs. I do have a job and had one longer than my husband). He gets to our house and gets drunk regularly. Doesn’t interact with anyone and when he plays his video game, he tends to stay on the game until its time for everyone to go and won’t leave until he finishes the game…even if it is late. I don’t want to be rude but I don’t want him around any longer. This is just a vent but what kind of jerk threatens to ruin a woman’s shoes? Especially if they are tied to a special day?
Post # 2
Member
671 posts
Busy bee
How does he get invited then if you and your husband don’t like him? It seems like no one likes him
Post # 3
Member
1066 posts
Bumble bee
Umm… why the hell is he at your house? Blacklist him.
Post # 4
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
alleycat1984: Well, my husband has poker nights and so one of his friends invited this guy. At first, the guy played with them and then he would drift into the living room where I was hanging out and then eventually he would stop playing with them and just stay in the living room.
Post # 5
Member
8469 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
I think you need to ban this guy from your house, he sounds awful.
Post # 6
Member
9556 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
Yeah, I wouldn’t invite rhis guy iver anymore…
Post # 7
Member
809 posts
Busy bee
Yeaaa just don’t let anyone invite him over anymore. That’s ridiculous.
Post # 8
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee
Doralise: Its sounds as though no one really likes him.. can you just speak to your friends and make sure no one invites him? doesn’t mean he can’t ever hang out but other people shouldn’t be inviting him to YOUR house if neither your FI or you like him or want him around.. Your house, your rules!
Post # 10
Member
7620 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
- Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!
Who the f*** lets an idiot like this keep coming over? Stand up to him. Or if you can’t tell your FI to stand up to him and tell him to not come around because he’s disrespectful and adds nothing to your group. I wouldn’t want “company” like that around. Some people can’t take hints and you need to TELL them.
Post # 11
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
You husband should tell him bluntly but politely that his behavouir is eratic and not appropriate. You wish him well but you can no longer continue the friendship. You are in different places in your life and right now you feel it is doing more damage than good to continue with something that is not making you or your wife comfortable. Please, accept that this is how we feel and respect our decision. (spelling is awful but i write a neat little speech)
Post # 12
Member
2263 posts
Buzzing bee
Yeah, I would pretty much let everyone know, ‘hey, don’t bring X with you–he’s a dick’.
On another note–congrats on your vow renewal! 🙂
Post # 13
Member
3308 posts
Sugar bee
nessdawwg:
+1000 Boundaries need to be set with troublesome friends and family.
Post # 14
Member
2126 posts
Buzzing bee
- Wedding: June 2014 - Baby #2 due Sep 2017
This is very simple: tell all your friends not to invite the guy. If he still comes then stop hosting and have another friend host. What if he came over and spilled beer on your dress!?!?! Don’t let him near your house!!!!
Post # 16
Member
3378 posts
Sugar bee
Doralise: I’m sorry, but at this point it’s your own fault. It’s your house and this guy is rude. Don’t let him in the door. Demand that he leave. It isn’t rude to kick out someone who wasn’t invited and nobody wants there. Stand up for yourselves and put your foot down.
Member
