(Closed) Who was your bridesmaid?? Any drama/problems with who to choose?!

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
1491 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013



My ORIGINAL choices for Bridal Party:

Best friend from college as Maid/Matron of Honor.  

FBIL’s Wife as other Bridesmaid.


THREE DAYS after I asked her, and after I said I wanted her as my bridesmaid because we were all going to be family and also because she and her husband (FBIL) are a great example of a strong marriage…. We all find out that she’s been cheating on her husband and was leaving him!!!  I was so shocked and pissed.    So she was quickly OUT of my bridal party (and my life). 


Secondary choice for Bridal Party:

Still had Best friend from college as Maid/Matron of Honor. 

And added…Best friend from work as bridesmaid.  


And everything was as it should have been from the get-go.  My girls worked together great and got to be really good friends.  Totally supportive and wonderful. In the end I had the most amazing bridal party and was so glad they stood up with me!!!

Post # 4
555 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think I always knew it was going to be these 3 girls (my sister as the Maid/Matron of Honor, my best friend, and my other really close friend).

The third friend was the only one that I wavered on at one point because she lives so far away (she recently moved to another province) but in the end, I’m glad it’s her. She also has made me a bridesmaid at her wedding.

Post # 5
480 posts
Helper bee

I really wanted two, a Bridesmaid or Best Man and a Maid/Matron of Honor. I knew I wanted my cousin as my Maid/Matron of Honor. But really, her, her sisters, and I were joined at the hip(s) throughout our childhood, and I was just as close to the middle sister, so I wanted her too. And then I would just be a horrible person if I excluded the youngest. I hated the the idea of an odd number, so I asked my bestie from college. So much for small. 

Now I’m panicked that Fiance will struggle with four guys. He is one of those people with a ton of  acquaintances and few close friends, but that’s fine with him. But I refuse to let him have a “semester friend” in our forever pictures. 😛

Post # 6
1979 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Commenting to follow thread (trying to pick my BMs)

Post # 7
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

I had 5 that I wanted:

Best friend as Maid/Matron of Honor

2 close friends that I’ve known since first grade

Family friend that I’ve known since birth

Friend whose husband is one of FI’s groomsman, the two of them are our best couple friends


But due to some Future Mother-In-Law drama, I felt compelled to ask my 2 sisters as well (we aren’t particularly close, so they didn’t care either way)


Now I have 7…but everyone is excited so I think it will work out well!

Post # 8
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I have 4.  I have my childhood BFF and my more recent BFF (she has been my friend since 13, so childhood friend as well), and that was where the problem was.  My childhood BFF has had a very difficult last several years, is extremely competitive and hasn’t been a great friend to me, she has very little in the way of money, and has become extremely unreliable.  She often commits to events and then finds excuses to back out.  I worried over the choice, but don’t care so much if I lose a bridesmaid, but it is extremely difficult to lose a Maid/Matron of Honor and then asking another person is just sort of insulting.  Many friendships don’t recover from that as well.

I have 3 other childhood friends that I asked, and one of them was extremely rude in turning me down (which I expected a polite no), but the other two were excited and supportive. 

I am not the girl that makes life all about her, in fact, I don’t particularly like the attention.  I am in my thirties, and honestly, too old for the sh!t.  This week, my childhood friend had a meltdown because I didn’t pick her as Maid/Matron of Honor.  Strangely, our other friends are so fed up with her, they believed I made the right call in not choosing her as Maid/Matron of Honor, and felt bad for my conflict.

I chose the right person, after all the stress and turmoil, she has always been there for me, has never judged me, told me straight, and has never let me down or insulted me.  Go with your heart, not with obligation.

Post # 9
905 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

When we got engaged I had 6 girls in mind… and really only wanted 4 bridesmaids. One made it easy, as our friendship went through a rough patch right when I was choosing, so she’s going to be a regular guest. We’ve patched things up, too, so we’re both really excited for her to come celebrate. Another, I realized, I don’t speak to but during the holidays when we exchange cards. We were much closer in college. I’ve asked her, instead, to do a reading. She’ll be included, but not as a maid.

The final 4:

BFF = Maid of honor. It’s been her spot since we were 14. 

Childhood friend. Held the title of BFF from ages 11-13. She’ll be singing a solo, as well.

Sorority sister from college. Sweetest thing.

Super close friend from grad school. She’s so cool!

EDIT: So far, drama llama free. Here’s to hoping it stays that way!

Post # 10
338 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I am having 3 bridesmaids 


FSIL- Maid/Matron of Honor


My Bestfriend of 13 years as a bridesmaid ( I kind of regret not having her as my maid of honour , the reason I didn’t originally pick her for that is because when I got engaged we were going through a tough time in our friendship (first since we were 12)


and lastly my sister and no I didn’t and still don’t really want her as a bridesmaid she pretty much just gave herself that title and my mum wanted me to have her if I was having FSIL 

but anywho can’t change them now and I am sure I will be happy with them on the day

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