(Closed) Who will walk me down the aisle?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
13017 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If they are joining soon, I’d imagine they’d be out of basic by the time December 2013 comes up.  At that point, they may be doing advanced training or be on manueveurs, but there may be a chance that they could talk to commanding officers to get leave for the wedding.  (My brother-in-law was active duty Army when they got married and he got like 2 weeks of leave for the wedding from his XO). 

I’d suggest not stressing over it now until you know what will happen.  And if, Heaven forbid, it does happen, you can find some way to honor their sacrifice for our nation at your ceremony, and they will be there in your heart.  They won’t know their orders until shortly before the wedding, and they won’t know if this is even an issue until they’ve finished basic and gotten their assignments.  So, no need to worry yet about what ifs and maybes (although, I know it’s much easier for me to say than for you to do…)

Good luck! 

Post # 5
Member
13017 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Oh, okay.  I’m more familiar with the Army (lots of family and friends served/serving, almost joined myself), so I know that basic is only 12-14 weeks (depending on the unit) and then a couple months of specialized/advanced training depending on job placement.  I just googled the USCG, and it says 7.5 weeks of training, and then placement into afloat or ashore units.  Obviously that will be an issue depending where they end up, but it’ll be basically 6 months after finishing training and I bet they’d have some R&R saved up.  Luckily, everyone is aware that your wedding is coming up well in advance, so they could possibly work out some sort travel arrangement to be at the wedding.

I know there’s nothing to say to make you feel better and it’s just going to be a waiting game until they actually get in and get their assignemnts.  It’s hard, and it’s heart-wrenching…but it’s an incredible sacrifice they are making.  You should be so proud to have helped in raising two great men who are willing to be so selfless. 

Post # 7
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I’m very sorry tht you are dealing with this, but kudos to you for not letting them see your emotions around it. They’re younger and need to make decisions that will put them on a path to success, and they would probably feel tons of guilt over missing your wedding if they knew how sad you are (I’m sure they feel that way anyway!!). With that said, they might be able to get leave… nothing is definite!

Post # 8
Member
33 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My dad died when I was 22.

At 39 and getting married for he first time, I never considered having anyone walk me down the isle. I know it’s traditional to do so, but I am an independent adult making a decision to marry. If my fiancé doesn’t have an escort, why should I?

I think you might feel sad that your dad isn’t here to see you marry and I understand that. Go ahead and mourn it. It’s also sad your brothers won’t make it to your wedding (mine isn’t either). But do let yourself have a wonnderful day. Life has a strange way of turning out exactly as you need it to.

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