(Closed) Who would you invite…?

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Who should be invited to a vow renewal?
    Just original bridal party. : (2 votes)
    6 %
    Original bridal party and close family. : (12 votes)
    36 %
    Original bridal party and close friends. : (3 votes)
    9 %
    Original bridal party, famliy and friends. : (11 votes)
    33 %
    Everyone from the wedding. : (0 votes)
    Other- explain below. : (5 votes)
    15 %
  • Post # 3
    6597 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I voted for just bridal party and close family but I almost want to say just close family.

    5 years seems to be quite close to the wedding to be having another all out wedding-like celebration! Now 50 years that deserves a big up’n party!!!

    Post # 4
    4824 posts
    Honey bee

    Just those closest to you. Immediate family and maybe a few best friends

    Post # 5
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Wait – it says 2016. That would mean you’re just getting married this year, and you’re already planning your 5 year renewal?

    Post # 6
    241 posts
    Helper bee

    are you still close to all of the original bridal party?

    Post # 9
    3788 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    I have a hard time with the concept of a vow renewal if it is below 10 years or something. It just seems like an excuse to throw a party. Just throw the party without the facade! So in that respect, I do think wearing your gown again and inviting a ton of people is too much. Something like 25 or 30+ years I could see having another big shindig.

    Post # 10
    7771 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    Honestly, I think it is up to you/ (whoever is having the renewal).  I am curious about this/ what others think to some extent, but I know that opinions are all over the place, so to say.  I think you can/ should do whatever is right for you.  Each situation is unique.  I tried to write a post asking whether you would get a new dress (or wear the original) if you were renewing vows yearly and some people were really judgemental.

    I think it would be nice to wear the original at a 5 year, especially if it still fit.  But it would also be nice to get a new one.  I also think that it depends what kind of event you want to have- that determines who would be invited- if you want to have a big party or just a personal moment.

    ETA: I also think it depends what kind of wedding someone had in the first place.  We got married just the two of us, only two witnesses, so for us, a renewal at 5 years might make sense.  I also see a wedding/ renewal/ party as only an outgoing expense (that has been my experience) so I would never see it as a gift grab- but everyone is different.  Here in the midwest I planned a wedding and spent a fortune on it, there is no way I could have ever thought to “make” anything from it- people spend like $25 on gifts.  Other people have weddings thrown for them.  I just think it is important to keep in mind – everyone’s experience is different. 

    Post # 12
    1087 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    just close fam & friends. I dont think everyone else needs to be invited. This is not as big of a deal for others as the wedding.

    Post # 13
    3788 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    @SnowPeony: “I’ve found it odd that people seem more against vow renewals than divorces?” That’s not a fair comparison; you didn’t ask about divorces, but I am more against those than vow renewals, obviously. Besides, you did ask if people think if it is appropriate, so I explained the background rather than just answer no. Considering that your original post was very nicely unbiased, I thought this discussion was actually open to both sides. Guessed wrong on this one, apparently.

    Post # 16
    3788 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    @SnowPeony: No offense taken or intended on my part. But as I said, your original post was very open to discussing both sides, but then as your started talking about your own plans, your tone shifted to give the impression that people with my opinion probably should keep our mouths shut on this one. I hope that I phrased my own post politely because my intention was to say throw the party and celebrate if you want to; I just don’t get the point of having another full “wedding” so soon.

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