(Closed) Who’s more traditional when it comes to engagement/weddings, you or your SO?

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Who's more traditional when it comes to engagement/weddings, you or your SO?
    I'm traditional, my SO is untraditional. : (3 votes)
    4 %
    I'm untraditional, my SO is traditional. : (41 votes)
    59 %
    We're both traditional. : (15 votes)
    22 %
    We're both untraditional. : (10 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    4887 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Oh my god, if my fiance laments “god, Kristen, can’t you just be more traditional!!?” one more time I’m going to force him to elope to the courthouse.

    I never wanted to wear a traditional white wedding dress.  Thanks to him, that’s what I have.  I didn’t want cake, he didn’t want a first look, so we compromised on both.  We’re a hot mess.

    Post # 4
    Member
    399 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I’d say we go back and forth. On some things, like having all of our family there- I am more traditional. Its a requirement. But when I mentioned maybe wearing a colorful dress, he said he’d always liked the idea of seeing me in a white dress (as in, he would really prefer that. On some things, like choice of venue- we are on the same untraditional page and are constantly looking for whatever we can afford that looks least like a banquet hall. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    399 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @Ambergris:  Though we pingpong back and forth on the wedding, we too have very similar ideas on the marriage 🙂

    And its kind of fun continually seeing who is more/less traditional for different aspects because I don’t really know what to expect!

    Post # 6
    Member
    58 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    My Fiance wants all the traditional stuff in a wedding. I would like to go to hawaii and get married!

    Post # 7
    Member
    1544 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    We both are traditional but in our own ways… Engagement he wanted to ask my dad but i told him not to. He was slightly relieved though. but we both wanted traditional proposal. Wedding we both dont want super traditional but i want more tradition then him as hed love to just run off and elope and spend the money on our honeymoon instead.

    Post # 8
    Member
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    We are both semi traditional. I didn’t care about all of the traditions, but a few basic traditions were important (like not seeing the exact ring before the proposal, a planned romantic proposal, him not seeing my dress before the wedding, etc). He is from a different culture, so his traditions are totally different, and like me, he picked a few that he considered important.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1855 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    I’m super traditional.

    Only because I’m annoyingly OCD, and I’ve been planning my wedding for 18 years. I didn’t care who I was marrying at 3 years old, but I knew damn well what my wedding would look like.

    Fiance would have been content proposing like OP suggested she was fine with. I was like

    “Not a chance in Hell.”

    Deep down, I know the real cause of it.

    Fiance was married before me for an astonishing 6 months. The wedding was uber casual. No proposal, no wedding dress, no wedding cake. I just feel like I need to do better than that, because I’m his second bride. And I don’t care about other couples. I actually love the non-traditional weddings that I’ve been to. I just want a traditional one because his first wedding was the polar opposite.

    I’m so pathetic.

    Post # 10
    Member
    1297 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I was picturing a more “traditional” engagement and was disappointed at first when he wanted me to take him to jewelry stores and show him what I liked. But I understood that he really wanted to get a ring I would love. He eventually picked out the perfect ring (which I’d never seen before) and I wouldn’t change a thing about the proposal or ring.

    With wedding planning, he is definitely more traditional. He wants the big wedding, not seeing each other before the ceremony, garter toss…

    Post # 11
    Hostess
    23602 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2011

    He was the traditional one as we were planning!! He’d often have freak out moments that i wanted to think outside the box!

    Post # 12
    Member
    1994 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2015

    I didn’t know where to vote on this one.  In all other aspects of our lives, I’m more traditional, whereas the SO is not.  But when it comes down to engagement/wedding stuff he tends to be more traditional than I on certain things.  Since we just really started looking at rings, the biggest disagreement that we’ve had up to this point is the ring.

    (Example: Black Diamond Discussion)-

    Me:  Babe, I’m so in love with Black Diamond Engagement Rings!

    The SO: “Wow really, that’s so dark, like death, you wanna associate our marriage with death? How about a regular ring, you know a traditional white diamond. . 

     

    Post # 13
    Member
    347 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Fiance is definitely more of the traditional one, im more of an offbeat bride to be.

    Post # 14
    Member
    879 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @tbarton:  I am the same!! I would have been happy with a destination wedding (preferred it even), but my fiance would never agree.  This is the first wedding for his family and there is a good chance his brother will be content being the perpetual bachelor, so I understand.

    I think unlike some girls growing up, I never had dreams of my wedding day.  I never desired to wear a big poufy white dress nor felt the rush to get married, even after we’d been together for a few years and kept getting those ‘when are you getting married’ questions.  I even suggested shopping for my ring together, but my fiance said NO WAY!  Lol. We are having a pretty traditional wedding though, except for a non-religious ceremony with our own vows and not sure about the garter/bouquet toss.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2135 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    We are both traditional and untraditional in our own ways. Like I would have been more then happy with a colored gemstone ring, but he wanted to get me a diamond.

    In general though, we are both leaning towards untradtional.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1676 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    He is more traditional than I am in most cases, but still not too terribly traditional considering he agreed to our courthouse wedding. He came around to a lot of the untraditional things I wanted/were cheaper (and thus made more sense to me), 

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