(Closed) Who’s NOT doing a bouquet/garter toss and what is your reasoning?

posted 8 years ago in Reception
Post # 3
Member
3539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

My reason because I hardly ever see it at wedding(maybe its just because im from oz).. but im kinda still sitting on the fence about it!

Post # 4
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I hate the symbolism behind the garter toss! It started out as a way to prove to the bride’s family that the bride and groom were, er, consummating. That’s just a major ick for me, and since I’m not attached to the tradition, we’re just saying no. I might do the bouquet toss just because my mom & Future Mother-In-Law love them, and may murder me if I don’t. 😛

Post # 5
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I am not doing garter or bouquet toss. Just not a huge fan…no reason really. I think that it is fine for people to have them, I just don’t want to.

Post # 6
Member
26 posts
Newbee

I don’t think we’ll be doing either.  As a wedding guest, I’m never excited about the bouquet toss, and neither are my single, female relatives.  Also, I think I would be uncomfortable with the garter removal as spectacle aspect.

We aren’t having a dj/dancing reception, so I don’t think it will seem awkward when we don’t gather everybody up for the tosses.

Post # 7
Member
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

We’re doing a spin on it because we don’t have a lot of single friends anymore. We’re both some of the last of our friends to get married and most of our un-married friends are in long relationships.

I thought about having all the married women come up and then something like having them put the garter on their husbands instead! Something about the older women in my family will make for a good bouquet toss! When was the last time your parents or aunts/uncles had a chance to participate in that stuff?

Post # 8
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I won’t be doing either also.  All of my guests are in their late 30s and early 40’s plus..It would seem weird.

Post # 9
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

we are not doing either because we are doing a destination wedding and will have only approx 30 people present.  It is going to be a very casual wedding– I have always thought of them as something you do with a larger more formal wedding. 

Post # 10
Member
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’m not doing it mainly because I personally don’t care for participating in it when I’m a wedding guest.  BUT, the primary reason is that most of our guests are couples and the single guests basically consist of my Maid/Matron of Honor and my 13 year old cousins.  I think she wouldn’t like that very much!

Post # 11
Member
305 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I have never not seen it done.

We aren’t doing it

A) My Mr. feels really awkward and uncomfortable with fishing around under my dress for my garter and flinging it to his fam/friends who are all mostly married and really probably don’t want to be holding my intimate little something. Can’t say that I blame him lol

B) Some bouquet tosses are just plain awkward. Ladies have to be literally prodded and corraled by the DJ or DOC to stand in a clump, everyone moves toward the back so they don’t REALLY have to participate. Some girls feel obligated to participate so as not to be rude or make the whole thing seem like a flop to the happy couple. I suck at throwing, and, um, I like my bouquet and want to keep it and I have no interest in having two made.

I think we’re just avoiding the all around awkwardness for everyone involved lol

Post # 12
Member
11 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m not doing the traditional bouquet toss because first of all most guests at our wedding will be married and secondly I always hated participating in it at other weddings.  So to put a spin on it, we are going to tie a gift card and maybe some scratchers to it and invite everyone up for a chance to catch it.

Post # 13
Member
2470 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

We aren’t doing it either. I never liked the bouquet toss and since some of my female guests are older than me, I know they would’t appreciate it.

I am considering giving my bouquet to the woman who has been married the longest (my FI’s grandmother)

Post # 14
Member
5984 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

i am not doing either. i think the garder thing is creepy and just wrong. i am not doing the bouquet toss because i just dont like it. i think they are awkward things that people do at weddings that dont make sense to me. so..if it does not make sense i am not doing it 😀

Post # 15
Member
149 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’ve never been a fan of the garter toss, so I decided against it from the very beginning. My fiance’s response to everything I decide against is: “But it’s TRADITIONAL!” I don’t care! I’m making my own traditions!

As for the bouquet toss, the vast majority of our guests are already married, and I really don’t want to shine the spotlight on the few of them who are still single. Personally, I never really liked having to be “one of the single ones” at all the weddings I’ve attended in the past!

Post # 16
Member
388 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I didn’t do the bouquet toss because it always made me really uncomfortable when I was single (even when I had a boyfriend but was unmarried-single).  I always liked that scene in Sex & The City when they went to a wedding and just let the bouquet drop in front of them.  I sort of feel like that.

And I just don’t like the garter thing.  I have actually never been to a wedding where they did that.

A nice alternative to the bouquet toss that I considered is when you have all the married couples dance, and then the DJ dimisses everyone based on how long they were married, and the couple left has been married longest (like 50 years or whatever).  Then you give them the bouquet.  It is a very sweet thing I think.

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