(Closed) Whos paying for their own wedding?

posted 8 years ago in Money
  • poll: Paying for your own wedding?
    Yes I wouldnt have it any other way : (43 votes)
    34 %
    Yes but getting help on little things (limo, veil, shoes) : (57 votes)
    46 %
    No my parents are : (22 votes)
    18 %
    No my FIL's : (3 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    400 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    That would be me  =}

    Post # 4
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    We’re kind of in between! The Future In-Laws and my parents are helping us out (very generously) and we’re covering some of the costs ourselves. I think this is becoming more common lately, for those of us who are lucky enough to have parents/FILs willing to help out. So I guess I don’t have a box, but it would be some sort of “all of the above!” 

    Post # 6
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @sep – no, I meant sharing the bills between the bride and groom and both sets of parents – I thought that it was traditional for the brides’ parents to pay, and the groom’s parents to pay for the rehearsal dinner, and maybe one or two other things? 

    Like I said, we’re doing a mash up of help. I’m paying for all the DIY materials, invitations, Save-The-Date Cards, the wedding cake, cake stands, my shoes, decorations, the alcohol, and a lot of the other “little” things. My parents are contributing a set dollar amount, and the Future In-Laws are contributing things that they wanted (i.e, part of the cost of their expanded guest list, etc.) 

    Sorry if I wasn’t clear!

    Post # 7
    11325 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    We’re about half and half. Total budget is 18K, my parents are doing 7k, FI’s mom is doing 1k, FI’s dad is doing 0, and we’re doing 10K. 

    We were planning to do the whole thing ourselves and then our parents offered. Honestly… I feel really bad about accepting the money from my parents. I tried to decline it but my dad said that it would be an insult to him not to take it. Doing a super cheap under 7k wedding isn’t an option either, because my mom is all about us doing a fancy schmancy thing and its super hard to even reign her into the 18k! haha. I’m also super grateful for FI’s mom’s contribution. She really doesn’t have a ton of money so I think its very generous of her to offer us 1k. 

    Post # 8
    1110 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2009

    Us. =[

    Post # 10
    5498 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    That would be us! my FIL’s are helping out with the cake/dinner. Everything else is all us.

    Post # 12
    233 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    We are, and we are loving it! Whenever there is a suggestion we don’t like..we don’t listen.

    You want a +1 for certain young guests who aren’t dating anyone? Umm, no.

    You want me to incorporate that tradition with the uncomfortable symbolism? No, sorry, can’t do it.

    You want to use your dog as flower girl(??)…well, you bees get the point!!

    Post # 14
    11 posts
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I am! It can get pretty stressful at times figuring out a way to pay for certain things, but in the end I’ll feel proud and accomplished that I did everything myself! Smile

    Post # 15
    1897 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I think it’s great that you are independent and don’t want to “rack up someone else’s bill”—but I’m also very independent and could afford a lovely wedding on my own.  It is deeply ingrained the long line of my family that the parents of the bride always fit the bill.  Sure, lots of people say it’s a dying tradition, and it’s great that people who’s parents cannot afford to pay have alternatives.  BUT just cause mom and dad are paying doesn’t mean we’re dependent on our parents—it means they want to doing something as huge and gracious as pay for our wedding.

    edit: in many cases, this is something our families have been financially planning on–they would insulted if I did not follow tradition because giving us that gift is something they take great pride in.

    Post # 16
    5154 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    @virginiamarie…ditto on all accounts!

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