(Closed) Who's paying for your wedding?

posted 9 years ago in Money
  • poll: Who's paying?

    Your FI and you alone

    100% brides parents

    100% grooms parents

    1/2 brides, 1/2 grooms

    Part self, part parents (both sides)

  • Post # 62
    Member
    3771 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    View original reply
    @Ms.GoodEarth:  With that said, I understand what you mean about being jealous that other people have their parents contributing. I was 100% financially independent from my parents at age 18 and paid my way through college without receiving a dime from my parents. I worked my ass off during undergrad to make it work. Then, I was really jealous of people who had parents to pay for their college educations. Why my parents are now willing to pay for part of my wedding is strange to me, particularly after they haven’t given me any money for 8 years, but I haven’t asked questions. 

    Same situation here. Parents made me (in a good way) pay for my own education, car, etc. I was always jealous of friends that just got handed cars and college tuition! Even money for rent in college! While they all had fancy cars and fancy places to live I rode my bike to campus and lived in the college slum lord area. I mean it wasn’t horrible, but boy was I jealous. I guess in the end it evens out a bit? But my parents INSISTED on paying for the wedding.

    Post # 63
    Member
    1927 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I am paying about 55%, My parents are paying about %20 and my fiance is paying about %25

    Post # 64
    Member
    735 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    We are paying for our own wedding, but my parents are “giving us the photographer coverage as a wedding gift.”  (I think my dad was thrilled that we didn’t ask for money or expect help, so they offered this.)

    FI’s mom & dad are hosting a rehearsal dinner at their home.

    I feel like the wedding is for our families too.  But Fiance & I decided that it’s what we wanted to do.  The option of eloping was seriously considered last September, but we chose to have a traditional wedding after realizing how much our grandparents, aunts and uncles wanted to be present to support us.

    Post # 65
    Member
    1736 posts
    Bumble bee

    I voted 100% my parents, but it’s not entirely true. FI’s parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner and we have paid for my dress, his suit, our wedding bands and all the invitations. I’m very grateful for my parents support. I never expected it, but was humbled at how much they are willing and able to give.

    Post # 66
    Member
    11231 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    You don’t really have an option for it, so I chose the last one. It’s split between Fiance and I and his parents (mom and dad/stepmom)–my family doesn’t have the money to help out at all. 

    Post # 67
    Member
    2239 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    My option wasn’t up there.  So, my Grandma is paying for the venue which is also doing the catering.  Groomy wanted to scoop the bill up but Grandma wasn’t having it. She said his job is the honeymoon, lol.  So, she’s handling our venue and food costs.  My daddy gave us money to use for other vendors so he’s covering the wedding cake, two bridesmaid dresses for my sisters, photographer, DJ, florist, and violinist.  🙂  Mom said she’d help with my wedding dress.  Groomy’s parents are covering rehearsal dinner costs and are helping us find a good price on flights.  Apparently, from the sound of it they’re trying to take that on too.  Totally not necessary, lol.  Everyone is spoiling us.  I keep trying to keep things small and on the simplistic side and Grandma keeps going on about how we need x, y, z.  I’m the first grandbaby to get married and she never got to do the big wedding thing.  So I think she wants to do it up for us.  So, for us both sides of the fam are involved (but not just our parents).  I voted 1/2 and 1/2 because we’re getting help from both sides.  🙂

    We are handling honeymoon and wedding bands and other small stuff in comparison.  

    Post # 68
    Member
    3354 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Lacelibs:  I felt exactly the way you did until I thought about how much I wanted things to go MY way .. and suddenly, paying for my own wedding as opposed to having my parents pay for it was definitely the way I wanted it.

    Post # 69
    Member
    750 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    Basically my parents…by my FI’s parents are paying for the booze!

    Post # 70
    Member
    5072 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Fiance and I are paying for everything ourselves

    Post # 71
    Member
    701 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    My mom is paying for half and Fiance and  I are paying for the other half.

    Post # 72
    Member
    9129 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    My Fiance and I plan to pay for it by ourselves.  This will be my second wedding so I don’t expect my parents to contribute at all.  His parents may kick in a little money but again we aren’t expecting it and I would prefer to save any money given to us for our honeymoon.

    This means we are on a tight budget, under $5,000.  Thankfully neither of us is interested in buying a house any time soon so we’re saving money for our wedding and honeymoon without the worry of a down payment for a house on top of that.  At least one good thing comes out of my first marriage; I did my first wedding for under $8,000 for everything (rings, dress, food, drinks, etc…) so I know where I can cut the budget to make sure we come in under $5,000 for our wedding.

    Post # 73
    Member
    684 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    There was no option for 2/3 bride and groom, 1/3 bride’s parents. Groom’s parents refused saying that it is the bride’s family that should pay. (The grooms parents are very wealthy & apparently cheap)

    Post # 74
    Member
    870 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I voted part self part parents, but it’s more accurate that my parents are paying 2/3 of the costs, Fiance and I are paying the other 1/3 and his mother is hosting the Rehearsal Dinner. 

    Post # 75
    Member
    135 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @Lacelibs:  Same thing I said, but its split between my parents and his…and then maybe us for like dress and tux rentals…

    Post # 76
    Member
    3770 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    We planned the entire thing ourselves with what we could afford ourselves and never asked for contributions. My dad did ask and we said we had it covered and what ever they would like to give us as a gift we would appreciate. This made things pretty cut and dry in how the decisions were made (between DH and I).

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