- 7 years ago
- Wedding: August 2015
We intentionally chose a venue that does a ton of weddings. A lot of my planning has been “what do couples usually do? Oh? that sounds great, lets do that.” It’s saved me so much stress. Granted my wedding won’t be unique, but it’ll be beautiful. And none of our guests (that we’re aware of anyway) have ever been to a wedding at this spot so no one will even notice.
I agree with the majority of posters that a planner isn’t necessary, but common sense and a general ability to coordinate are. My mum and I planned my wedding, which wasn’t exactly small, and lasted from Friday afternoon (our required civil ceremony) to the wee hours of Sunday morning. We had our wedding mass on Saturday, followed by a wedding breakfast for 200+ guests, and a formal, white tie dinner and dance for a smaller group in the evening in a different venue. This is fairly common in the UK. There was a break between the events to allow guests to rest and get changed. Everything went very well. The food was fantastic, the music was lovely, and all the guests at both events were well-fed and happy.
Frankly, I have coordinated, planned and hosted so many dinners, events and balls (I coordinate a debutante ball every year) that I saw absolutely no need to spend money on such a service. I’ve been to many weddings, and as far as I know none of them used a wedding planner. It’s a wedding, a promise of love and commitment between two people in front of their guests, and not a West End theatre production. It doesn’t have to be perfect, although injured guests and an insufficient number of lavatories should best be avoided.
It depends the type of person you are. I wish wish I hired an even coordinator or at least day of coordinator. Looking back I would have gladly paid $1000 for a day of coordinator. I was budget wedding so couldnt afford $5,000. I really got the best deals but I couldnt enjoy the wedding at all the day of. Common sense can only get you so far. I used to be a fundraising event coordinator so I planned large parties before. but let me tell you a wedding is different and trying to think about so many details is stressful. the whole planning was stressful, the day of I cried a lot bc I didnt delegate anything to anyone, and everyone was coming up asking how do i get here, what time is this? where do I go? How do i get a cab? can you…just non-stop. where do I get this. I assigned myself as point person and I was beyond stressed. My sister kept telling me “stop being so indecisive make a decision, I literally broke down and couldnt function” my wedding ultimately was a success, beautiful and nice once we got to the venue. There was a maitre d who took care of everything and a bridal assistant so that was good. luckily the venue took care of the ceremony, food and details at the wedding, my photographer took charge and my sister finally.
What a nightmare!! That poor couple!! That being said though, a planner/DOC definitely isn’t necessary if you’re well-organized and have common sense. Our wedding was absolutely perfect and we planned it ourselves. But I had contigency plans for literally everything that could have gone wrong.
I recently attended a wedding where the bride hired a wedding planner and had a team of 3 DOCs on site, and the day still didn’t go smoothly… at all. We were locked out of the venue with nowhere else to go (dozens of people in formal wear shivering on the sidewalk), and the room where they had their cocktail hour was over capacity. If I were her, I’d be furious that I’d spent thousands of dollars on a planner!!
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