(Closed) Why am I so difficult to please : (

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think you need to let it go- I think you will enjoy it despite your reservations anyway.

 

This is not your party to host, it is hosted for you. You should not have much input in my opinion.

Post # 4
Member
741 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

You have your wedding to plan exactly how you want, but it might be helpful to think of your shower as a gift instead of an extension of your wedding. Myself and many other bees do not have someone to throw us a shower, so focus on the positive that someone is putting their own effort and time to help you celebrate getting married.

Post # 5
Member
1103 posts
Bumble bee

While I understand feeling disappointed that your Maid/Matron of Honor is hosting a party in your honour that doesn’t fit with your style/wishes, I agree with the PP who said to consider the shower a gift. You get to show up, be showered with love and presents and lots of attention, and not organise anything. Focus on the fact that people care about you enough to do this for you and try not to be too disappointed 🙂

Post # 6
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I must say planning bridal showers are quite the task (I’ve planned my share) and just remember that, like everyone is saying, it’s a gift to you and I’m sure your Maid/Matron of Honor is working really hard to make it the best for you. You never know, the hall she rented may be all she can afford. Your wedding is your planning and that’s what you will remember the most.

Post # 7
Member
443 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m with the pps. I’m also quite picky about, well, everything, and also like what I like unabashedly. But, I would never dream of making a shower inspiration board because it’s not the bride’s role to organize it. If you’re concerned that the shower will reflect poorly on you, remember that your guests know that you didn’t plan it, and that it is a gift to you from the hosts.  Being anything other than thoroughly grateful for the day they’ve planned is unbelievably rude and could have serious consequences for your relationship with the Maid/Matron of Honor (in addition to, as you say, looking bratty to all the shower guests). It’s not worth it – throw your emotions and creative energies into the wedding you’re hosting. 

Post # 8
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m not going to be able to have a shower, so I’m jealous you even get to have one at all.  =o(  If you were in my place, you probably wouldn’t feel so picky.

Post # 9
Member
8882 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I agree with the PP. The point of the shower is to spend time with your BMs and loved ones and enjoy the time with them. It’s not all about the party details, it’s about the people attending wanting to share that time with you.

Post # 10
Member
8519 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@BlissfulMrs:  You could also look at this an an opportunity to work on your control issue. Think of how proud you could be of yourself if you get through this without worrying yourself silly or raising your blood pressure.  

Post # 11
Member
1571 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You should be grateful that your Maid/Matron of Honor is spending the time and money to throw you a shower. Put away your shower inspiration board, put on your big girl pants, and appreciate what you are being given.

Post # 12
Member
2756 posts
Sugar bee

I was under the impression that brides didn’t plan the shower at all? I’ve never heard of a shower inspiration board… I’m not sure if I’ll even get to have a shower since everyone is spread so far out, so… I guess I’d say just take a deep breath, back away from the inspiration board and realize this is a gift and an honor being bestowed upon you by your closest friends. Accept it, love it and appreciate it!

Post # 13
Member
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Move on to the things you can and should control – a shower being held FOR you by people nice enough to care about having and attending one for you is not in that list.

You can control gratefulness, you should probably apply your anxiousness to control and be picky to how you exhibit this to your Maid/Matron of Honor and HER guests.

Post # 14
Member
673 posts
Busy bee

@LMD84 <– This.

I have to say, it’s one thing for a bride to lend a behind-the-scenes hand if the hostess asks for some help in planning. It’s another thing to create a “shower inspiration board” and hand it off to them expecting they give you exactly what you want.

Like the others have said, you really need to appreciate this gift your friend is giving you. There are many brides on here who don’t get showers at all. I expect to be in that category when the time comes. If I did find out I was getting one, I would never in a million years hand off a list of expectations that other people not only shower me with gifts, but have the party exactly as I envision everything.

Post # 15
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@j_jaye:  this is great advice.

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