(Closed) Why are people so offended if you are a SAHM and have a degree

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
2280 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

It’s your life and it’s none of their business. If they don’t like it, screw ’em.

Post # 4
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

When I got my masters, I hadn’t met my husband and I really had no clue where my life would go. I wanted to have a degree so if I had to, I could support myself. However right now I don’t have to. My husband makes enough money and I’d prefer to stay at home when the baby comes. Later on in life when the kids grow up, I’ll probably use my degree again. But I find nothing wrong with not using it right now.

Post # 5
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Good for you!  You’re right, one can never be “too educated,” and I don’t think an education could ever be considered a waste of money.  I think a lot of negative comments about issues like this are related to some women’s insecurities in themselves, or jealousy that maybe they can’t afford to stay at home as long as they would like.  Congrats on getting your masters degree, and hope you enjoy spending as much time as you can with your little one!

Post # 6
Member
6009 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

We seem to be in similar positions.  🙂  I am hoping to enter a grad school program this fall and stay home full-time with our daughter.  Even after I finish my program, I will continue to stay home until all of our (future) kids are in school.  I plan on keeping up in my field by volunteering or possibly taking some project work, but I don’t want to work full-time, outside the home in the immediate future.

My advice is to ignore the naysayers.  I don’t think an education is ever a waste; plus, it sounds like you may want to re-enter your field in the future, and an advanced degree will certainly help with that.  As far as your husband goes, give him some time.  Having a baby changes who you are, and both of you need some time to adjust to your new selves, your new partners, and the new dynamics in your relationship.

Post # 7
Member
5148 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

None of their business.

And I personally think it’s ideal that SAHMs have a degree of some sort; there are no guarentees in life, situations may arise where the woman needs to be the breadwinner (divorce, husband becomes disabled or passes away, etc).

I know of a couple, both MDs, the wife is a Stay-At-Home Mom. And before they had kids, she was even the one bringing home more money than her husband.

Post # 8
Member
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

a lot of what you’re hearing from people is feminist backlash. ignore them and do whatever is best for you and your family.

Post # 9
Member
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I have a BS in engineering that I fully intend to quit using at the point that Darling Husband and I have kids so that I can be a Stay-At-Home Mom.  Honestly, I’ve never in my life wanted any career besides to be a Stay-At-Home Mom.

But my education provided me with way more than just a degree.  You learn so much more about yourself and about life when you are in school.  Plus, I needed a means to support myself until Darling Husband and I decide to have kids.

Ignore the naysayers!  SAHMs with degrees rock in my book!

ETA: My mom was also a Stay-At-Home Mom and she had a Master’s degree too!

Post # 10
Member
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Good for you! I think it’s really important. Who’s to say when you kids graduate high school and are off to college that you won’t need to fall back on those degrees? You should be proud of yourself!

Post # 11
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

What about all those people with degrees that are working at a bar long after? They’re not using their degrees either. Let’s judge them. 🙂

I think it’s one thing if you get a degree and look for a job in the field and can’t find one then end up having children and not using it. Plus you never know when an opportunity might open up once your children are older.

I might consider it a “waste of money” if you just got a degree with no intention of ever using it – either professionally or as a volunteer.

 

Post # 12
Member
1556 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

People are jealous.  I bet the people saying this either don’t have a master’s degree or if they do, they have to work and don’t have the option to stay home.  If they put your choices down, they for whatever reason, feel better about themselves.

I think it’s awesome that you have an education to fall back on if you ever need to, but that you have the opportunity to stay home with your children.  It is truly the best of both worlds.

 

Post # 13
Member
3943 posts
Honey bee

 My mom was able to stay home with us until my youngest sibling was in elementary school. She only went back because my dad passed away suddenly. She always regretted that she didnt finish college because it has been so hard for her. She took classes here and there but wasn’t able to finish.

I have my B.S. and a successful career and when the time comes, I would LOVE to be a stay at home mom. Unfortnetly, that won’t be able to happen because we need both incomes. But anyways, what I am saying is that having an education, regardless of what you decide to do with it, will never be a  bad thing. You never know what the future holds and its great that you have something to fall back on.

Post # 14
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I know where you’re coming from. I come from an educated family…where if you don’t have your phD you’re pretty much a failure. I was planning on going to college and pursuing history, getting a degree, then quitting once we decided to have children. I thought it would make our newlywed life way more difficult so I decided to skip college and go right to SAHW/M. I’ve gotten plenty of crap about it, but as long as you’re happy that’s all that matters. People are way too quick to jidge.

Post # 15
Member
3871 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t know I don’t think any woman can win nowadays.  I can’t be a Stay-At-Home Mom because we need both incomes and there are people who say that’s bad. I think being a Stay-At-Home Mom is great, if you can do it. I think the amount of work that a Stay-At-Home Mom does is just as hard as someone who has to be a working mom. 

Post # 16
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

If you’ve found something that works for your family, more power to you. 🙂

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