(Closed) Why can’t you understand why I need this?

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yea its tough.  I am sleeping a ton as well and its really hard for my husband to understand.  

Post # 4
2547 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Men will never understand, period. Just try and get as much rest as you need. I remember those days, I would wake up in random places in the house at night, being like “how did I get here?” I guess I would just randomly pass out. Anyways, it’ll get better, and you will get less tired after the first trimester.

Post # 5
1032 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I feel SO tired too and I know my husband thinks I’m just being lazy.

I read somewhere that men don’t really understand until we LOOK pregnant. So even though he knows you are pregnant, nothing looks different. I have a feeling he will be more understanding once you have a huge belly. But I think right now, they just seem their same wife and are not able to really understand all the changes that are happening.

Doesn’t make it right….but that may be why he doesn’t understand.

I have also heard the line “women become mothers once they are pregnant, men don’t become fathers until the baby is born”   sad but true! haha

Post # 6
448 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Aww!! It doesn’t honestly seem that hard to understand? Women are so much more tough!!

Post # 7
2820 posts
Sugar bee

Oh my.  You need at least 8 hours of sleep, especially that first trimester.  I’d go on a hike with my husband and come back and sleep for an hour or two, he’d be shocked at how out of it I was.  I was also working for complete @$$hats on a ridiculous schedule with lots of stressful drama they were creating so I’d be so exhausted at the end of the day I’d just come home cry, try to exercise a bit, eat and sleep.  Luckily he was understanding though, surprised, but understanding.  Tell your husband 8 hours of sleep is the minimum you need. 

Post # 8
384 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I have to second what a few others said about it getting better.  With my first I would get up for work at 8 in the morning.  I took a 30 minute nap during my lunch break every day and then went home around 6.  I would eat dinner and fall asleep watching tv until 8 or 9 when I would get up and go to bed.  I was sleeping roughly 12 hours a day.  Almost the exact day that my 2nd trimester started, I felt awesome.  My mood improved and I was able to make it on only 8 hours of sleep a day. 

Post # 9
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Just so you know, it’s easier with the second pregnancy because they realize everything sooner. At least my husband does this time. Last time he couldn’t understand, but let me sleep anyway.

Post # 10
1477 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I haven’t felt too tired, but I probably go to bed about an hour earlier on average than I did before I was pregnant (however, I no longer sleep through the night so I’m not necessarily getting more sleep) and with the cramps/nausea I get, laying down is sometimes a necessity even when I’m not tired.

My husband doesn’t get it either, so finally I read to him aloud from WTE about our metabolism rising, our blood pressure rising (or was it dropping? I can’t remember) and all those factors. That appealed to the logical side of him and he’s gotten off my back since then.

I read though, in WTEWYE, that a pregnant body while resting is still working harder than a non pregnant body training for a marathon.

Men. They wouldn’t last a day being pregnant.

Post # 11
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

I don’t even work and I’m exhausted all the time! It’s a big, hard job on your body to grow a baby. Luckily my husband gets it.

Post # 12
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Sounds like my mother who claimed she didn’t need a lot of sleep.  I haven’t asked my dad and my grandparents never said (though they DID tell me A LOT of other stuff she did that she claims she didn’t do).  I’m lucky that my Fiance understands when I need sleep, so I know he’ll be great when I GO get pregnant.

Seriously, though, you DO need a lot of sleep and it’s easy to get tired fast while pregnant, especially your first one.  It wasn’t so bad with my daughter, but my son… I wanted to nap every day at 1… and I had to be at work at 1! Plus I was a cashier at wal-mart (NOT FUN!).

Ignore him, use the “pregnancy” card if he gives you grief (especially the ‘I’d like to see YOU pregnant!’ line) and get the rest you need.  It isn’t nearly as easy after the baby is born, unfortunately.  

good luck!!!!

Post # 13
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2007

I had a hard time getting enough sleep during the week, so I would literally come home on Friday night and sleep through till Sunday morning, waking up only for periods of an hour or so at a time. I think my husband didn’t realize that was even possible until I did it for three months.

Post # 14
3587 posts
Sugar bee

I feel the same way! His son was born 13yrs ago and he was in Afganistan while his son’s mom was pregnant, so I’m the only pregnant woman he’s really been around, besides his sister, but that doesn’t count.LOL He does things for me around the house, but I’ll still get flack from him for being “sooo tired”!

Post # 15
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m one of the lucky ones with an understanding husband.  I come home from work and fall asleep on the couch every.single.night. He just covers me with a blanket and goes about his business. 

Our new thing is to start watching a TV show together, I fall asleep and then wake up as it ends and make him tell me what I just missed.  He’s a very patient man. 

Post # 16
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - MacLean Park

That totally sucks. I’m not gonna lie, I slept at least 12 hours a day for the first 10 weeks, and some days I clocked 16. I was EXHAUSTED! My hubs didn’t understand at first, but I was always so zoned that I think it finally clicked. Plus, I never got sick (kinda nauseated sometimes, but luckily no puking) so I told him he should count himself lucky since I planned to make him hold back my hair if I was 😉 I kept spouting off the facts that your body is making more blood (40-50% more that you have normally), and manufacturing a placenta. Losing about five pounds by doing nothing also freaked him out and he realized that my body really WAS working in overdrive! Try to keep peppering him with facts, like my favorite “your body is now working harder sitting down than a non-pregnant one would be running a marathon”. I mean, you’re growing a new baby, providing nutrients, and growing the placenta which will support it after your first trimester. You have every right to be exhausted, and lazy there needs to learn to pick up the slack for you around the house.

It took me a long time to get that idea beaten into my husband’s brain, and luckily my Mother-In-Law is awesome about coming over and shaming him about the filth when I’m gone and totally cleaning my house. God bless her.

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