(Closed) Why did you chose not to have a bridal party?

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 16
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

No bridal party here,  because my best friend lives in another country and is unable to attend due to visa  issues.  I can’t accept anyone less important to me as my Maid/Matron of Honor or  BM. Also were saving so much money on not having a bridal party that it  outshines other reasons to have them. 

Post # 17
2853 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

It’s hard to stay close with friends once your out of college and finally in the real world. I’m either working or spending time with Fiance and his kids, so its great to keep in touch and catch up often, but its not longer like, “oh we’re bffs we have to do everything together”. 

And more importantly because I’m a complete control freak about lots of things especially my wedding, and I basically dont want help or input from anyone except for Fiance. Having bridesmaids would mean letting people get involved in helping me and I don’t want any input/suggestions/help from anyone really unless I were to ask…. its my wedding, MINE!!

…anyone else feel possesive about their wedding like that? 

Post # 18
622 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

None for me because I have a lot of close friends — and it would be extremly expensive – therefore only having my sister stand up for me — to avoid asking my elementary friends and not my high school friends… or my college friends and not my military freind…. ugh… just too many… 

Post # 19
4823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

BeeutifulBee:  I had one “Best Woman” and no bridesmaids – it seemed better to have everyone else come as guests and wear what they want and not have any responsibility other than enjoying the day.  My Darling Husband had his brother as Best Man and he chose two ushers from his extended family.  We thought it was wonderful, simple and so easy.    

Post # 20
6272 posts
Bee Keeper

My Fiance is having a best man and I’m having one of my very close friend’s little girl as my flower girl and that’s it. 

Main reasons being budget, and the fact we are having a small ceremony and I have many very dear female friends that I love very much. Some as part of a group from where we live, some old childhood friends and I’m also close to my cousin too.  I’d either have to have bout 10 bridesmaids or none at all, so due to budget and the fact we will be a small gathering for the ceremony its none. 

Post # 21
7903 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

We didn’t have a bridal party. We got married in a private ceremony. We repeated our vows again at our subsequent wedding celebration, but we still didn’t have a bridal party because we wanted it to be like the original. Not having it eliminated another aspect of planning and hassle, so I have no regrets. 

Post # 22
109 posts
Blushing bee

I didn’t have a bridal party just my sister standing with me. I didn’t want more decisions I already had enough with the wedding. I have a friend who recently got married and one of her bridesmaids is literally rolling her eyes in every other picture. She looks like she is having the worst day ever.

I don’t think she would have been asked to participate if she was going to “ruin” the pictures. My friend isn’t happy about it but there isn’t anything she can do about it now. 

Post # 23
927 posts
Busy bee

If you want to have bridesmaids I suggest just having your two sisters. And no Maid/Matron of Honor, that way you don’t offend the other sister. No one else (cousins, friends, SIL) should be offended that they weren’t picked because they should recognise that sisters are in a different league. 

Post # 24
376 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

I chose not to have a bridal party because all I think of when I think of bridal parties is drama, hard feelings, lots of money to spend and obligations on all parts. Fiance and I are each having a witness (so basically a best man and a maid of honor, but without any specific clothing) and we’re having flower kids, but nobody is going to stand up with us at the altar. In my opinion this is going to be about the two of us and I don’t see why anyone else should be up there. In some way I feel like this would take away from the privacy of the moment.

Mind you, where I’m from bridal parties aren’t that common and have just started to be a thing a couple of years ago…

Post # 25
1299 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

No bridal party here either! I have a bunch of sisters — and we’re very closeknit but I live on another continent at the moment — plus since I’ve lived in so many places the last 10 years I have girl friends that are very close to me that are spread out across the world. None of whom know one another and none who know my sisters. Fiance has 3 guy friends that he would consider asking as BM’s but they all live on the other side of the world and it’s unsure if they would be able to come since it’s $$$ to travel such a long way. 

Despite not having BM’s (or a MOH), I haven’t had any issue finding girlfriends to talk wedding with and those that are interested are my sounding boards for ideas and planning. Plus my mum is super supportive and hands-on with the planning so she’s the one I go to for everything. No drama, all my friends are happy as they can participate or not participate as they like.

My sisters will still walk down the aisle. It will be FI’s brothers, Fiance w/parents, my sisters, me with parents. But all family will sit in the first row and my sister’s won’t carry bouquets. It’s more to honor them as immediate family then to have them ” stand up” with us. No matching dresses/suits — but I will pay for their hair (and make up if I get mine professionally done). So I’m not really saving a huge amount of money.

So far – zero regrets!

Post # 26
178 posts
Blushing bee

No plans for a bridal party here either! While I do have two wonderful women I’d definitely choose if I wanted one, it just seems like too much, both financially and commitment-wise. Here are my reasons for going solo:

  • Without a bridal party, or plans to do a processional other than my own, I don’t have to have a formal rehearsal, or rehearsal dinner, which saves money.
  • I don’t have to have anyone getting ready with me in the small bridal room on the morning of if I don’t want to.
  • I don’t have to ask my friends to spend a lot of extra money for a dress, hair, makeup, jewelry or shoes (they have young children at home and diapers cost a fortune, I’d rather they keep their extra money for that!)
  • I don’t have to stress over potential hurt feelings of who is/is not included.
  • I don’t have to make a million appointments to go bridesmaid dress shopping and/or worry about pleasing them with dress selections.
  • No risk of building up tension from the stress of planning and subsequently damaging very important relationships. 
  • My friends and family can enjoy the day and be part of it without feeling like they have a job to do.

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