(Closed) Why do I need to defend myself?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2496 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

Ask them, “why does it matter to you?”  🙂

Don’t defend your choices to anyone.  If you’re happy and it’s right for you, then ignore jealous or rude comments like that.

Post # 4
Member
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Mrs.Jansen: Your decision to get married, as well as your timing, is NO ONE’S business but your own!

Post # 5
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I think it’s silly that they would even question the length of your engagement. Your reasons to have a 6 month engagements make perfect sense to me, I’d do the same in your shoes. But you shouldn’t have to justify your choice to anyone, anyway.

Maybe you could come up with a few snappy comebacks like “We want to be married before the world ends in 2012!”

Post # 6
Member
14415 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

At the stage you’re in, 30’s have the house, living together for 2 years.. nope, I think if you want to get married asap and ttc, that’s not too fast at all! 

Post # 7
Member
631 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I had people ask what was taking us so long to get married.Don’t worry about trying to make anyone other than you guys happy. I would much rather have preferred a shorter engagement, but we just couldn’t afford a wedding in 6 months. I think it’s great that you are getting it done quickly so you can move on with other, more important goals.

ETA: I’d let my natural smart-a$$ come out and ask them, “Why do you ask, what date works for you?”

Post # 8
Member
9824 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

“We’ve been together for 4 years, is that not long enough?”

Post # 9
Member
14496 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Don’t justify anything to anyone.  It has nothing to do with them and I would tell them that. 

Or you could go, because it is the only day that the Doctor could make it.  He is all booked up for the next few millenia saving the planet.

Post # 10
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

You should tell people something stupid, so they understand how stupid their question is. 

I would tell them something like “We would have gotten married sooner, but I wanted to make sure the incisions and brusing from my boob job wouldn’t show up in any of the wedding pictures”

or…”We wanted to be able to convince people that our newborn was actually born in wedlock, so we couldn’t wait any longer”

My husband and I were engaged FOUR MONTHS after we started dating and we were married THREE MONTHS after getting engaged.  My parents (who have been married 30 years) knew each other only SIX MONTHS before getting married and they’re still going strong!

It’s a decision personal to you and your financee and none of anyone’s darn buisness as far as I am concerned!

Post # 11
Member
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

P.S.:  Not a single person (despite our short courtship) ever asked why we were getting married so soon.  In fact, my mother and husband wanted the wedding in October!

Post # 12
Member
1340 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Don’t justify it or come back with a snappy line. My abrasive (and hopefully humorous) personality might say something like, “Oh I’ll just wait until my ovaries shrivle up and die” or something with the word spinster–I love that word.

Post # 13
Member
631 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Mrs.Darling:

I love everything about that response.

Post # 14
Member
568 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Mrs.Jansen:

Its not like you have only met him 6 months ago,  its been a long time,  and why wait if you know what you want……..and what you say about your age and children……biological  clock  and all that.  

go for it…….cos when you know,  you know.  

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