(Closed) ?? WHY DO PEOPLE ASSUME ??

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
3367 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I had to learn to walk that line with my mom… bless her heart, she really wanted to help out but she kept taking over and making purchases and decisions for me that were completely off from what I wanted… we made it through, but I did have to finally ask her not to finalize anything without me seeing it.

Maybe this is something your fiance could handle for you?  It’s his sister right?  He could mention that you guys are skipping that.

Post # 4
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

It’s really not that big of a deal. She probably assumed because she herself had one or would have one. No one is perfect and everyone tends to assume things sometimes, so calm down. All you have to do is say you don’t want one and aren’t going to have one. No one is going to toss you down some stairs because of it.

Post # 5
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

And to add on, I’m the first of 5 girls gettings married in my family. So everyone is trying to take over everything. I just tell them to knock it off, it’s my day and they can deal with it or they can’t. They usualy just stop it and we’re fine. No one has any hard feelings and I’m a happy bride planning my own wedding.

Post # 6
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

And to add on, I’m the first of 5 girls gettings married in my family. So everyone is trying to take over everything. I just tell them to knock it off, it’s my day and they can deal with it or they can’t. They usualy just stop it and we’re fine. No one has any hard feelings and I’m a happy bride planning my own wedding.

Post # 7
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I think it would be pretty easy to bring it up.  Just say you were thinking about it and would rather open gifts up in privacy.  Or are going to be tired and would rather lay low the next day.

Post # 8
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Whoa, triple post! Sorry about that, don’t know how to delete them!

Post # 12
Member
46604 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s easy enough to say ” After having taken some time to think about it, we have decided we will not be doing a gift opening.”

Post # 13
Member
1473 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Awww, man. I know I am very loud and open and what I feel I say. One of my sisters is just like you though and for the life of her, she just cannot tell people what she thinks or feels if it means going against them. At least you guys are leaving for your honeymoon the next day so you have a nice excuse! i wouldn’t worry too much though, it’ll all work out for ya!

Post # 14
Member
128 posts
Blushing bee

Well it’s tradition in my family to have gift opening parties after engagement parties and weddings, and I’m sure we aren’t the only ones. Usually very close friends and family come around the next afternoon for tea, coffee, cake and something to eat and have a chat about the night before. It is also a good time to catch up properly with the bride and groom if they were understandably busy the day before trying to catch up with everyone. Usually held at the brides mothers house or there own.. 

That being said it should be fairly simple to say  ‘I’m not going to be having a gift opening party because were leaving for our honeymoon the next day’. No biggie, its not like your lying or anything.

Post # 15
Member
762 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Don’t think you missed your chance by telling your FSIL you will not be having a gift opening party. My Future Mother-In-Law thought we were going to be hosting a brunch the day after our wedding, and seemed disappointed when I told her no.  She totally caught me off guard, and when I went home later that evening, I called her to tell her no. I said, “I know you had mentioned the idea of a brunch, but Fiance and I are at budget, but you and Future Father-In-Law are more than welcomed to host one.” I felt sooooo much better that I nipped it in the bud. Everytime she does something like that, i call her out on it and she stops doing it.

Post # 16
Member
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

omg I wouldn’t want to open gifts in front of people!

Tell her that Fiance and you are having your own party! I would want it to be special with my new husband as we opened cards and checks. I’m not sure people get that many gifts brought to the wedding anyways?

The topic ‘?? WHY DO PEOPLE ASSUME ??’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors