(Closed) Why do people think they’re entitled to a position in my wedding?

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I can’t believe your 40-50 something aunts would expect to be BMs…that seems so “off” to me.

Post # 4
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

me! me! me! pick me!!  im going to need a bridal party gig after my Maid/Matron of Honor gig in november so make me a BM pleeaasssseeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!  i mean i know we never met and heck im not even in the same country but i deserve to be your Bridesmaid or Best Man i promise

🙂

Post # 5
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Yeah, wait, aren’t you inviting every bee you’ve ever spoke to on here to be a BM? hehehe. ;D

Post # 6
Member
375 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

So…am I your maid of honor on not?

Post # 7
Member
762 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Can I be a Bridesmaid or Best Man in your wedding too? Just kidding. Wow! I can’t believe how rude they were being, especially the Aunts. Well, actually I can believe it because when it comes to weddings, people’s true colors start to really show, and they start making it out to be all about them and start losing sight of what that day is supposed to be about. When Fiance and I got engaged I already knew who I wanted to be in the wedding which was my best friend of almost 20 years and my sister. . . that’s it! No flower girl, no JBM’s, no ring bearers. I only wanted the people who mean a lot to me, who know me best, who have been there for me through the good times and bad. I think it’s rude for people to assume they are going to be in someone’s wedding and to actually ask the bride.

Post # 8
Member
7408 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

What are our dresses going to look like? 🙂

Post # 9
Member
170 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Ugh. Welcome to my wedding!

My aunt(40-50, is a whole carousel of problems, especially since she’s never been married/engaged herself), keeps making really snide hints because I haven’t asked her to be in my wedding. She asked who was in my party, I told her, and she asked,

“Well, what do I get to be?”

to which I replied,

“um….my aunt?”

Then she said “oh nevermind, I guess you just want me to pick up the trash, then”.

What the hell. I’m sorry…I don’t have any helpful advice for you, only my sympathies.

Post # 10
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Ah, sounds like what happened to me!  My FBIL’s Girlfriend reeeally wanted to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my wedding because she is so insecure about her status in the family.  I barely know the girl and don’t like what I do know about her.  She was a total ass when we got engaged and didn’t even pretend to be happy for us, and then felt ENTITLED to a spot in my wedding party!?! WTF.

So I totally sympathize with you, especially because these people are asking you to your face which I didn’t have to deal with.  I really feel that the bridal party should be the people who you want to be with you on your wedding day, not the random people who beg you, you don’t want to look at your wedding photos and be reminded how you were annoyed that you ‘had’ to put someone in your wedding party.  Hopefully you can still drop those extra people before you have to get dresses, etc.

Good luck!

Post # 11
Member
1691 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

First of all, wasn`t it even more rude that during someone ELSES wedding they were bringing up yours…nevermind asking to be in your bridal party!!!

Post # 12
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@Frustratedbird: Wth?  What self-respecting 40+ year old tries to push herself into the bridal party of a 20something year old neice?? 

Post # 13
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Pinksapphire: Wowza. Have who you want to have.

Everyone wants the pretty dress and shoes, but soon forget about your bridal shower and bach party.

Pick someone who will be dependable and you can count on. If asked just firmly say “I’ve made my decision, but I appreciate your wanting to help”

My godmother was upset I did not ask her daughter to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. I just told her I made my decision and I was not making any changes

Post # 14
Member
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Holy cow! When people get engaged, people start acting like dogs. Panting over wedding stuff! Its gross!

I would NEVER put any of my Aunts in my wedding. Who does that normally anyway?

I think you should SHUT down anyone that hints. Its rude to hint period!

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