Post # 1
Last night was my step-cousin’s wedding. However, everyone spent the whole SEVEN hours talking about MY wedding. I kinda wanted to avoid convos about my wedding because there were some people there that I don’t want to invite. Then, it was like everybody thought I’d be giving them a position in my wedding. Umm, whoa?! I repeatedly had to tell everyone that I’m only having a my sister and either FCIL or Future Sister-In-Law as BMs. I’m not asking 40-something, 50 year old women to be BMs! My aunts were mad and had attitudes! My cousin kept hinting around that she wanted to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. NO, NO, NO! I don’t even want her at the wedding, but I have no choice to invite her. She’s constantly in and out of psych hospitals. I couldn’t depend on her to be there, or not to show her ass.
My cousin’s daugther came up and asked if she could be a junior bridesmaid, I felt bad saying no. So, I said she could. Who knows if that will actually come to be, though, because she’ll probably be in New York at her dad’s house next summer. When I told her yes, my older cousin looked pissed. Oh well! I don’t mind having two BMs and two junior BMs. But, I’m not asking everyone and having seven or eight BMs. Fiance doesn’t have many friends. He’s struggling to pick just a best man! I already know the party isn’t going to be even, but I don’t want it to be THAT obvious.
Today, Future Sister-In-Law asked me who is in my wedding party. She’s kinda been hinting around, too, that she wants to be in the wedding. She’s crazy, independable, and has NOTHING to do with me. I was considering my other Future Sister-In-Law for the position because she introduced me to Fiance. But, I’m not having my younger Future Sister-In-Law. I quickly told her that my wedding party would be small because Fiance doesn’t have many friends, but I can tell she’s mad about FCIL possibly being in it and not her.
I refuse to have people in my wedding who are of no help to me. My sister is in it because she is my sister. Other than that, anyone else will have to be worthy of the title. If a person is never supportive and there for me, she will not be in my wedding!
Post # 3
I can’t believe your 40-50 something aunts would expect to be BMs…that seems so “off” to me.
Post # 4
me! me! me! pick me!! im going to need a bridal party gig after my Maid/Matron of Honor gig in november so make me a BM pleeaasssseeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!! i mean i know we never met and heck im not even in the same country but i deserve to be your Bridesmaid or Best Man i promise
Post # 5
Yeah, wait, aren’t you inviting every bee you’ve ever spoke to on here to be a BM? hehehe. ;D
Post # 6
So…am I your maid of honor on not?
Post # 7
Can I be a Bridesmaid or Best Man in your wedding too? Just kidding. Wow! I can’t believe how rude they were being, especially the Aunts. Well, actually I can believe it because when it comes to weddings, people’s true colors start to really show, and they start making it out to be all about them and start losing sight of what that day is supposed to be about. When Fiance and I got engaged I already knew who I wanted to be in the wedding which was my best friend of almost 20 years and my sister. . . that’s it! No flower girl, no JBM’s, no ring bearers. I only wanted the people who mean a lot to me, who know me best, who have been there for me through the good times and bad. I think it’s rude for people to assume they are going to be in someone’s wedding and to actually ask the bride.
Post # 8
What are our dresses going to look like? 🙂
Post # 9
Ugh. Welcome to my wedding!
My aunt(40-50, is a whole carousel of problems, especially since she’s never been married/engaged herself), keeps making really snide hints because I haven’t asked her to be in my wedding. She asked who was in my party, I told her, and she asked,
“Well, what do I get to be?”
to which I replied,
Then she said “oh nevermind, I guess you just want me to pick up the trash, then”.
What the hell. I’m sorry…I don’t have any helpful advice for you, only my sympathies.
Post # 10
Ah, sounds like what happened to me! My FBIL’s Girlfriend reeeally wanted to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my wedding because she is so insecure about her status in the family. I barely know the girl and don’t like what I do know about her. She was a total ass when we got engaged and didn’t even pretend to be happy for us, and then felt ENTITLED to a spot in my wedding party!?! WTF.
So I totally sympathize with you, especially because these people are asking you to your face which I didn’t have to deal with. I really feel that the bridal party should be the people who you want to be with you on your wedding day, not the random people who beg you, you don’t want to look at your wedding photos and be reminded how you were annoyed that you ‘had’ to put someone in your wedding party. Hopefully you can still drop those extra people before you have to get dresses, etc.
Post # 11
First of all, wasn`t it even more rude that during someone ELSES wedding they were bringing up yours…nevermind asking to be in your bridal party!!!
Post # 12
@Frustratedbird: Wth? What self-respecting 40+ year old tries to push herself into the bridal party of a 20something year old neice??
Post # 13
@Pinksapphire: Wowza. Have who you want to have.
Everyone wants the pretty dress and shoes, but soon forget about your bridal shower and bach party.
Pick someone who will be dependable and you can count on. If asked just firmly say “I’ve made my decision, but I appreciate your wanting to help”
My godmother was upset I did not ask her daughter to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man. I just told her I made my decision and I was not making any changes
Post # 14
Holy cow! When people get engaged, people start acting like dogs. Panting over wedding stuff! Its gross!
I would NEVER put any of my Aunts in my wedding. Who does that normally anyway?
I think you should SHUT down anyone that hints. Its rude to hint period!