(Closed) Why do you want to have kids?

posted 7 years ago in TTC
Post # 3
Member
4038 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Honestly I don’t have a real reason other than simply feeling that it’s the right thing for me and my husband, at this time in our life….sort of like when you know your partner is the right one for you and you marry them, or any other huge decision. It just feels right, but more intense than that. We wouldn’t have kept trying, month after month, negative after negative if it was just something that felt right…it’s a stronger desire than anything I’ve ever felt for anything other than to be with Darling Husband. It’s not that it feels right, it’s that for us, it is right, and I feel it with complete certainty. And terror. 

ETA: Sorry, I realize this isn’t a very good answer to your question. I hope you get some more concrete answers from other bees. 
 

Post # 5
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I love kids. My nieces and nephews bring so much joy into my life, I can’t even imagine how amazing it would feel to have my own. I know there are going to be challenges, and struggles, and frustrations, but I think and hope that the good will outweigh the bad. I also can’t wait to see my husband become a father. I love our little family now, and am excited for it to grow. I’m also scared sh*tless. πŸ™‚

Post # 7
Member
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I look at my Fiance and think about how much I love him. Then I imagine carrying this little bean inside me that is *OURS… we made it, we will nurture it and watch it grow. Out of our love and our commitment, we get to create another human being. Another person on this earth will be alive because of us and I can’t think of anything more wonderful than living that experience.

It’s like falling in love all over again, that pull you feel towards your significant other, the joy they bring into your life. For me children are just pure joy, and I honestly can’t wait to become a Mom. Along with the joy come the hardships, and the heartache and the responsability but I belive the good outweighs the bad a million times over. If you really want to be a mother everthing else in the universe will sort itself out.

Post # 9
Member
2142 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I have always had a desire to be a mother. A yearning if you will. I love kids, not in the naive teenager way, kids are sooo cute I can’t wait to have kids and not realize how much work and money they cost. I think about how much I love my niece and nephews and what I won’t do for them. And I can’t even imagine how it would be possible to love my own kids even more than that.

For my husband and I the decision to have kids is not because it’s time. We’ve dated, we’re married, we have a house, a stable job, OK it’s time to have kids. That’s not why for us.

We have a desire to start a family. Something that is completely and utterly ours. When the uncertainty and shortness of life hit us straight in the gut with my BIL’s sudden death we decided to move up our TTC timeline. We realized at that point just how much we wanted to bring a baby in this world that was OURS. At that point nothing else mattered. Every other dream, want, checklist played second fiddle to starting a family.

It’s kinda crazy to think about this little life growing inside of me is purely out of our love. We worry just as every other couple, if not more. About all the things that can go wrong that we can do wrong. I tell my husband as long as our child feels our love everything else will be OK. There’s so much of her life we won’t be able to control but we can control the fact that she will always feel loved by us no matter what.

@MsFrancez:

I LOVE your response.

Post # 10
Member
217 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@regberadaisy:

That’s so sweet! 

I’m planning on waiting a couple more years TTC (I’m just 22), but I’ve always felt the calling to be a MOM, even more so when I fell in love and started envisioning my life alongside my partners’. 

I’m sorry for the loss of your Brother-In-Law, I also recently had the loss of a close family member and totally understand how it can put your whole life in perspective.

I wish lots of health and happiness for you and your baby.

Post # 11
Member
9483 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

No particular reason.  I always wanted to be a mommy as a child.  Baby fever is setting in more than ever now that I’m with Fiance.

Post # 12
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@MsFrancez:  Your response gave me chills! Amazing.

Post # 14
Member
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I am not the best with words at times, so hopefully I can explain well. Our main reason for wanting children is family. Darling Husband grew up surrounded by much love and supportive family members. He has an amazing bond with his cousins, sister and parents. I however, grew up with a father that left my mother after 17 years of marriage for his high school sweetheart while my mother was pregnant with me and never looked back. My mother on the other hand had 5 children that no longer have relationships with her bc she chose men, crime and other things over us. When I was 12 I was almost placed in foster care bc she was arrested and I along with with my 9 year old sister was left with a Boyfriend or Best Friend who sexually abused us at the time. My sister who worked with CPS in another state heard of the problems and has raised me since. I’m now 31 1/2. Totally different family dynamic huh?

I’ve craved normalcy since the transition if such a thing exists. With my sister and I breaking apart from our dysfunctional family; I’ve wanted nothing more than to provide a safe, loving, nurturing home for others. Something I never had till later in life. I’ll be honest and say for the longest time though I did not want kids bc of my experience, but I was shown by many that families are brought together in many different ways. I am not doomed to be my mother.

When I met my Darling Husband I knew he’d make a wonderful father with how he handles his niece and nephew and their deadbeat father. He’s a protector, but he’s also the most loving and soft hearted person. Unfortunately we have been suffering with infertility for the last 2 years and will pursue adoption. We see it as a blessing in a way and almost our fate that we were meant to adopt. We can provide a family to a child that doesn’t have one, like my sister did for me. It’s scary and yes we were sad with our infertility but we have always believed you build your own family however you need to. I know our little one or ones are out there just waiting to come home and complete our family. It’s all in Gods time.

Post # 16
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

I want someone to take care of me when i’m old and senile just like I am doing now. πŸ˜‰ lol

I want a family. It always felt like it was a step I was supposed to take in my life.

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