(Closed) Why get engaged if no wedding planned and live apart?

posted 4 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
5166 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

Personally I would never get engaged if I didn’t have plans for a wedding but maybe you should stop being so judgemental of your friends. You don’t sound like such a peach.

Post # 3
83 posts
Worker bee

This sounds like it’s none of my business. 

Post # 4
1117 posts
Bumble bee

I personally wouldn’t do this but it doesn’t seem like they’re asking anyone for an opinion.

Post # 5
3056 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

If their okay with the arrangement who cares.

Post # 6
9416 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
princesspeach89 :  my cousin does this – she thinks people will take her relationships more seriously if she’s “engaged” but after we lost count of her former “fiances” it sort of backfired on her lol

Post # 7
1033 posts
Bumble bee

If they’re happy and not hurting anyone with their decision then what does it matter? 

Post # 8
1143 posts
Bumble bee

I’m going to have to change my username after this -__-

Post # 9
9436 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Well in your post it sounds like they want different things and he proposed just to get her to stop bringing it up.

But in general I think couples get engaged without planning a wedding to show a bigger level of commitment than just dating. I know some longterm couples hate the boyfriend/girlfriend status but also don’t really care about getting married but getting engaged seems like a good way to get people to take your relationship more seriously.

I don’t see why it matters. Life is short. Do what makes you happy.

Post # 10
8007 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

If it works for them why should anyone else care? Better they should move at the pace they are comfortable with than conform to others’ expectations. Judge much?

Post # 11
292 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

Sounds like you had a big slice of judgmental cake for breakfast.  There are many reasons for having a long engagement.  The only thing I did in the first two year I was engaged was book a venue.  That’s it.  And there’s a few reasons for that:

1.  I’m a bad planner.  Just naturally unorganized.

2.  My mom was diagnosed with three completely different cancers during my engagement.  Not one that spread. Three unrelated tumors.  

3.  My dog became diabetic and went blind.  It cost almost 10k to restore his sight.

4. My FH was in an industrial accident that resulted in second/third degree burns to almost 10% of his body.

5.  We’re getting married 6500kms from where we live.  Even if I wasn’t unorganized, it’s still really expensive and frustrating to plan.


Life happens.  You never know why people do the things they do, and as long as it isn’t negatively affecting anyone, why should you care? Friends having a long engagement isn’t the end of the world.

Post # 12
162 posts
Blushing bee

That is just wrong, all wrong.  You should tell her that she has to return the ring and make amends to every single person who she has hurt by telling them falsely that she was engaged.  Then you should sit back and eat nachos and be proud of yourself for setting her straight.

Post # 13
1424 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

View original reply
LilliV :  aww lol 

Post # 14
9754 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Why do people come on the internet to write judgemental posts about people they know and shit that’s none of their concern?

I should start a spin-off thread!

Post # 15
3273 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

View original reply
princesspeach89 :  Short answer: yes, people do.


Agree with PP, not my business.

The topic ‘Why get engaged if no wedding planned and live apart?’ is closed to new replies.

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