Post # 1
Since talking to my family and friends I’ve had to stand my ground on not wanting stuff. Firstly, I’ve moved an average of twice a year (I can pack and unpack a one bedroom apt in 2 days flat) for the past 9 years. I know once I’m married I’d most likely have to move again. But our families insist on us having bouquets that they will then put into a shadow box, a cake topper for me to display, champagne flutes to display, the cake set, etc.
I”ve tried explaining that I don’t want stuff! I don’t want coffee table books of our wedding which I’m sure will one day fall into the grubby hands of my children (and they will be grubby because I was and he was—it’s genetic now).
I drink champagne at other people’s weddings, I have no idea what to do with a shadow box, etc. I have no idea where we’ll find room to put things from our wedding when trying to combine our lives (and stuff) into one place.
I do want my memories documented in photos and film but other than that I’m happy having just my ring as a reminder. Our families are insistent that these are things that we will regret if we don’t get. What do you think?? Will I regret not having STUFF?
Post # 3
From what it sounds like, you probably won’t regret ahving stuff. I think it’s probably a good idea to save things like your save the dates or invitations and wedding program, but other than that, I didn’t want to save much. We didn’t have a cake topper or champagne flutes and I don’t miss them!
Ultimately only you can make the decision, but it sounds like you know what you want to keep and what you don’t! So I wouldn’t feel bad about not feeling like you need to keep every memento.
Post # 4
I’m making an album of all the ‘stuff’. Our programs and invites and all that to consolidate it but still keep the memory around. But other than that a lot of’stuff’ just starts feeling like stressful clutter to me.
Post # 5
I am totally with you on this one! I’d only want things like toasting flutes and a cake serving set if it was going to become a new tradition that they get passed on down in the family for future weddings so it would have sentimental value, but I wouldn’t have to keep it! You could keep a card in the box with all the couples’ names on it who have used it.
You can tell them that if they want the shadow box then they can keep it 🙂
Post # 6
I doubt you’ll have any regrets if you don’t want the stuff! I love looking at my wedding ring and wedding photos. I love remembering the dress, the bouquet – not trying desperately to find a place for them!
Post # 7
I know what you mean! I really like owning almost nothing… I recently got a Kindle, so I can rid of the main source of clutter: books!
I don’t think you can force that on relatives though… it will take them some time to figure out that you’re serious about not wanting stuff.
Post # 8
I am the same way! You know what I did? I asked my parents if I could borrow theirs! I am borrowing their champagne flutes and cake cutting knife. I thought it would be a cute way to share a part of their marriage in our new marriage while cutting back on “stuff”! It was a great compromise, becuase believe me, all I keep hearing was how much I’ll regret it if I don’t have all this “stuff” to remember my wedding by. I do believe in keeping some things, just not EVERYTHING 🙂
Post # 9
I love the borrow idea! I tend to make small boxes of stuff. Like I would not save flowers, but a cake knife or cake topper? Sure. I am sentimental to the point where I would pack the mementos in a box for my kids. But I wouldn’t display it. Do your folks still display their mementos out in the house? Like on the mantle?
I think if you are into photos as memories, maybe a coffee table book would be nice. But it doesn’t have to stay out on the table. I would get a book only because formats change (film negative, proofs, digital cameras, DVDs, etc). A book will last longer than a flash drive will.