(Closed) Why is my dad such a jerk?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Wow I’m sorry you had to experience this. I can identify in a way…long story.  If your father can not admit that he wasn’t a good father to you then i understand why you can’t patch it up like it never happened.  Hugs

Post # 5
435 posts
Helper bee

So sorry.  I think you are right about not seeing him.  It doesnt sound like he has changed so what would be the point?  Sometimes we need to protect ourselves. 

Post # 6
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

wooowww, we are definitely jerk-dad twins….!!!!  So sorry.

Post # 7
1 posts

I made the decision to cut my father out of my life about two weeks ago.  He and I got into an enormous fued about a year ago.  This is all started when word finally got to me that my father had been telling family members for the past ten years or so that my mother had an affair on him at about the time I was conceived so he doubted he was my biological father.  Trust me, he is my biological father. 

My parents divorced 30 years ago when I was about 2 and a half.  My mother married a great man who pretty much raised me.  My bio-father made a few appearences a year but started his own family and moved several states away.  After college I made a strong effort to create a closer relationship with him.  My father is a difficult man and he has alienated many other family members, but I felt that it was important to have a bond and relationship with him.  Well, my reward was this man rejecting me behind my back to my brother, my uncles, my brother-in-law, etc.  

Now, when I explain to him how hurtful his statements were and that he needs to apologize for telling anyone who would listen that I am not his daughter, he refuses to acknowledge how I feel.  Instead, he goes on and on about how my mother betrayed him and how it ruined his life.  It is now evident to me that my father systematically blames everyone else for his problems, no matter how remote the wrong.  The things he has said about my mother are horrible but she is the one who has always had my back and been there for me.  

So Bambo, if your dad doesn’t have your back, and if he isn’t going to be a positive presence in your life, then do what you need to do.  I know I will get grief from various family members for my decision, but its my life and I don’t want it filled with someone else’s bitterness and anger.  Oh and he is not going to be invited to my wedding, if and whenever that may be.  My stepdad will be walking me down the isle.  good luck with everything.              


Post # 8
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@Bamboo: The people who are telling you this do not understand what you’ve been through. I think you are doing the right things, don’t let other peopl encourage you to do something that’s not RIGHT or HEALTHY for you. Good luck

The topic ‘Why is my dad such a jerk?’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors