WTF is wrong with your parents? I’ve seen your pictures and you look beautiful. From the way they’e carried on, I expected to see someone significantly heavier stuffed into a wedding gown. I do not see ROLLS OF FAT – I see an attractive body shape into a well-fitted, attractive dress. It’s a shame that your parents don’t see that.
Fat-shaming has grown so large in our culture…it’s absurd. And I know where you’re coming from: I was once morbidly obese and it was the only thing anyone wanted to talk about. I got a little garbage from my parents, but mostly from my grandma, who would chastise me every time she saw me eating something unhealthy. Or, well, if I even walked in the room.
And I’ll especially never forget the way she congratulated me after I lost 60 pounds. “Well,” she said, “Maybe the boys will like you now.”
Then you lose a bunch of weight and people act like you’re God. They treat you so differently, so much better. It should be embarrassing to those people. They should be humiliated to act the way that they do. But unfortunately, it’s often culturally reinforced. We have such an attitude of, “Your weight is in your control!” as though it’s easy.
Losing weight and exercising has been, at least to me, a constant game of vigilance. Wedding planning is stressful enough. On top of that, it’s your body and you get to decide how you’re going to live in it and handle it without heckling from somebody else – especially your own parents.
OP, it sounds like these people have been toxic to you for a long time. Your dad’s response is telling and very controlling. If he weren’t paying for so much of the wedding, my advice to you may honestly be, “Maybe it’s time to exclude your parents from your wedding,” as painful as it may be.
My best course of action for you is just to avoid them as much as you can. The bigger the wedding, the easier this will be. One would hope a mother would not have the audacity to insult her daughter on the wedding day, but then again, stranger things have happened…and that’s very sad.
I’m sorry to hear abotu the damage your parents have inflicted on you. If nothing else, the way to inspire change is NEVER to criticize or bully someone into doing so. And it’s time to lay off when they make it clear they’re happy as they are.