Post # 1
SO my mother and I have not been getting along at all since I moved my daughter and I out of her house and into my FI’s and I’s new home. Granted she knew about this for a year but she has been horrible.
So today she sends my birthday card home with my daughter who she picks up from school everyday. The card is signed with her first name because I am “no longer allowed to call her mom” She even told my daughter “remind mommy why it says Sarah and not mom.”
Who uses a birthday card to be bitchy at their own daughter?
Post # 3
Wow! I saw that you posted that on FB. What a piece of work. Write her a thank you card. 🙂
Post # 4
Bad enough that she had to do that, but to use your daughter as the middle man? Ugh. I’d be majorly P-O’ed.
Post # 6
to answer your question- a woman with serious issues of her own.
Post # 7
omg – i read ure last post, but reading this one i am so upset for you. thats horrible, I am so sorry.
Post # 8
Why use my birthday as a day to get back at me?
Post # 9
What a sad, sad, messed-up person. My friend’s ex-husband uses their kids to get to her all the time and I feel so bad for her; I can’t imagine what this is like for you. You’ve got to be a pretty low human being to try and turn a child into ammunition.
Post # 10
@SoontobeMrsA: Oh not you too? My mother sent me a birthday gift last year with a card and wrote something similar on it about how I “used to be” her daughter. And she makes comments like that all the time. I’ve posted the whole wedding drama here but one of the things she did at the reception was to sign the guestbook “Unknown”. seriously. thanks for the memories, mom!
I have made the choice to have no contact with her at all, at least for now. That’s a very personal and difficult choice though, and it was made after YEARS of all kinds of awful behavior. Not something I did lightly.
It sounds like you were a single mom? My firstborn came along when I was 20, and single, and I relied a lot on my mom for the first year or two to help with my son. She always went overboard and tried to take over and parent him FOR me though, and we butted heads a lot. I think back and see that period of time as the start of the downfall of our relationship, and it’s only gotten worse since. 🙁
When I moved out she was okay with it but when I married when my son was 4, she got even worse. She went on about how I didn’t “need her” anymore and when my second child was born she really kept her distance and isn’t nearly as close to him as a result. She couldn’t understand how to be a Grandma without being “another mom” if that makes sense.
Of course I’m just sharing, I don’t know the dynamic with your mom, but I sympathize. She tells everyone that she “had” a daugther but not anymore. I see it as attention getting melodrama and I refuse to “play” anymore.
Post # 11
@SoontobeMrsA: you are far better than I would be… ’cause I would’ve called her up and b’ed her out for that. using your daughter?!?!? and on your birthday to boot?!?!? did she expect you to live with her/in her house forever?!?!?!?
geez… sounds like MY mother, who demanded to know how’d she get to the store after I moved out! hello! you have a husband and you can drive!
((((HUGS)))) sorry you gotta deal with her!
Post # 12
Why use my birthday as a day to get back at me?
Because some people are horrible like that. My mother suffers from depression and has for as long as I can remember. During some of her lowest points, she has said some terrible, almost unforgivable things to me before because she couldn’t cope with her own feelings and needed to make someone else miserable as well. And if the mood strikes someone like this, they will use whatever will hurt you most. In this case, a birthday.
Post # 13
I am so sorry that you are going through this. She is acting horribly. Feel free to PM me. 🙁
Post # 14
@MsInterpret: and @linguo42: yup thats pretty much my mom in a nutshell. She constantly tells me, my daughter and anyone else who will listen that Mr. A is going to dump me.
Post # 15
Whoa, I can’t believe she would do that!! How can moms act that way??? i couldn’t even imagine..
Does she watch little A? Or does she just go there to spend time with her? Cuz seriously, if she isn’t babysitting, maybe you should limit A’s time with her. Who knows what kinds of things she is filling her head with about you and Mr A!!! Maybe she needs to be punished a little…
Post # 16
She was babysitting Annabelle but now that I’m laid off she is watching her after school because my mom begged for the extra time. Little A has high functioning autism so transitions can be tough for her. I knew it would be way too tough for her to just quit my mom cold turkey but now I just don’t know anymore. A is a very literal person (even at six lol) so she takes everything so seriously.