(Closed) Why? Why? Why?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
791 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

Stay away from this guy. He obviously has a deranged mind, since he assaulted you in every possible way, physically and verbally during your relationship. Just ignore him. Try not to respond to his comments. Maybe it sounds difficult, because the guy keeps insulting you, but I think that this is the only way to move forward to a new phase in your life. Most importantly, in case you answer to sth he says, stay calm and do not provoke him in any way, from what I understand his behavior could be unpredictable. What worries me the most, though, is that you even had a relationship with this man. It seems to me that you need to start loving yourself, appreciating your qualities, your dreams, your choices, in a word believe in yourself. That way you won’t ever put up with guys who enjoy degrading their partner so that they can feel good about themselves. I wish you all the best in your personal life and your career.

Post # 4
Member
1871 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

Um honey, why haven’t you ceased all contact with this person? In other words, WHY are there ways that he can still contact you–why the heck does he have your email and moreover, why are you even OPENING his messages?

If this man is seriously acting in the way that you are saying and you are serious about wanting it to stop, then you’re going to have to probably close the FB and MySpace accounts and get yourself a new email. Maybe a new phone number if he has that too. You can re-open FB and MySpace pages under nicknames or other names that he wouldn’t be able to search (fellow teachers do this so their students can’t find them), but I wouldn’t even recommend that because if he knows your friends, then he can look through their pages to find tagged photos of you and figure it out. At the very least, you can make yourself unsearchable on FB. You can make it so people who don’t know you or you aren’t friends with you can’t message you.

But I seriously question why YOU are allowing him to have access to you. That doesn’t make sense.

 

Post # 5
Member
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I agree with what @JennyW1: said and also you can block him from FB and set your settings so no one can search for you so even if he makes a fake account he will not find you.

Post # 6
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Two words: restraining order. Do you have the messages he sent you? Bring them to a police station, explain your history, and get a restraining order.

Post # 7
Member
411 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree with previous posters. Block him from MySpace, FB, and email. Change your name to your first and middle (or some other combo) so he can’t search for you – or better yet, make yourself unsearchable. Go get a restraining order.

If you don’t, you’re just going to let him ruin what you have now.

Post # 8
Member
2588 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Cut the contact. It’s really that simple. If you want this a-hole out of your life, you’re going to have to take some steps to make it happen.

Post # 9
Member
5147 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Block him from everything. Block his emails, block him on Myspace and Facebook, block his number from your phone, etc.

Do not respond to him in any way.

Post # 10
Hostess
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Block him on facebook, change your phone number and email and don’t even talk to this jerk again!  Who cares what his problem is, it isn’t yours to solve.

Post # 11
Member
2004 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2008

It sounds like you are still giving this guy the time of day. Even if your post you are trying to understand him and figure out what his problem is. Quit trying to figure it out! He sounds like a major loser and you need to stop interacting or thinking about him. No more contact, block him, ignore and delete all messages from him. With people like this, any contact (even telling them to go away) is perceived as encouragement, because it means you’re still listening enough to say “no.” Say no through your actions too and enjoy the guy you’re with now 🙂

Post # 12
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I was in that same situation about six months ago. My ex and I have been apart for well over a year now, but for the eight months or so he’d constantly message me, call me, etc, but he was constantly trying to get me back- I moved 2000 miles away specifically so that I wouldn’t be tempted to get back with him, since we were in such a terrible relationship, and he tried his darndest to show me that he’d changed, when he obviously hasn’t when he calls me names and makes me feel like crap when I refuse to come back. 

Anyway my solution was to block him from everything. He’s blocked on Facebook, AIM, and would be on email but honestly he has my adorable bunny that I couldn’t bring with me, and who is obviously his now because he won’t give him back, and so I’d like to know if he gets sick or hurt or something. After I blocked him on everything, though, and just didn’t respond, he stopped talking to me. 

Post # 13
Member
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@MrsMckaytoBE: You did the right thing by leaving him and I completely agree with everyone else that you should cut any communication with the guy. He is bad news, you don’t need that kind of treatment from him.

Post # 14
Member
32 posts
Newbee

id have him done for harrassment babes you dont need this he sounds like a bad man who wants to hurt you because you broke up.

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