(Closed) Why would FI say that?? =( (sorry if its long)

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
696 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

omg honey stop this thinking! You are beautiful as you are and do not need to change a THING as long as you are healthy. He should learn to appreciate what he has and love you for who you are. He should walk into a room proud to show you off because he loves you and because you ARE something to brag about…a kind, sweet, wonderful woman…obviously his ex didnt posses all the qualities that you do or she would not be his ex

Post # 4
Member
696 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Yup..just took a closer look at your avatar…you are stunning and he is an idiot if he doesn’t see it

Post # 5
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

okay… i don’t know if i’m reading this correctly… but did he say he was embarassed by your looks and that he didn’t feel like he could show you off?

if so… why the eff are you with him?

 

i mean… it’s one thing to say it’s your own fault if you aren’t happy with how you look… but it’s different to say that it’s your fault HE isn’t happy with how you look.

Post # 6
Member
911 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@graygodess20:  Be proud of who you are, don’t make it a competition with her…waste of your time/energy. There will always be someone out there who looks better, is funnier, dresses better, etc… Who knows if she even does, who cares?

Be confident!!!! Walk in proud of what you look like and who you are. If you get the chance, introduce yourself with a big smile and shake her hand. This would also get the awkwardness out of the way. Besides, confidence and kindness are much more impressive than anything else anyway.

As far as what you Fiance said, that would upset me as well. BUT, I know how men can be. If you have expressed previously that you are sometimes unhappy with your body, he may have meant that you have had time and why wait until now? As far as his comment about being able to show you off…I think that was hurtful, and may show that his previous comments were not in your best interest, if you know what I mean.

Grass is always greener on the other side, I have no body LOL….would kill for hourglass curves…rock them!

Post # 7
Member
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Wow, please don’t do anything like that and crash diet or use chemicals to lose weight.  If he can’t love you for who you are now and what you look like, he’s an ass.  Sorry, I don’t want to be mean, but that comment is reprehensible.

Edited: I misread! I thought this was to YOUR wedding… sorry!

Post # 8
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@abbie017:  it’s not their wedding the ex will be at. if i read correctly, it’s a friend’s wedding.

Post # 9
Member
197 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I’m no expert but there issue here isn’t the ex girlfriend. He can’t control where she gets invited and you guys have been together for 5 years so she should really be a non factor at this point! The problem is, your appearance shouldn’t have even been apart of his response so that’s what confuses me. Now this will be something that you’ll probably have insecurities about even past this wedding. I say if losing weight is something that you want to do for yourself then start with doing a little cardio a couple times a week and see where that takes you. Don’t let him belittle you into hiding though! He should be worrying about impressing you and what you think rather than other people.

Post # 10
Member
2565 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

What in the hell?  Any time I have made a disparaging comment about myself (usually during that lovely week out of every month) my SO immediately counters with “honey, you’re gorgeous, now get your head out of your a**!” 

I think you are lovely.  He should not have said such a hurtful thing to you. *hugs*

Post # 12
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

he should already be bragging about you just the way you are now.

Post # 13
Member
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Whoa whoa whoa…. NOT ACCEPTABLE!!!!  Who the hell says that to the love of their life?!?!  Um, no, he proposed to you knowing how you look and who you are.  If he can’t accept that, then he needs to find someone that fits his “vision.”  You deserve far better.  What a superficial asshole.

Post # 15
Member
66 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m sorry he made you feel ashamed about yourself and thinking you need to take an unhealthy route to lose weight. You are beautiful the way you are. 

I would have seriously punched him in the balls. Sorry, that is totally inappopriate of him to even remotely say something like that. Is this the first time he’s ever said something like that to you? I wouldn’t put up with someone that talks to me like that =(

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