(Closed) Why would she say that?!

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
708 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Is it possible she was just being sarcastic?

Post # 5
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I agree That it’twas probably a misguided attempt at being funny and when you were actually hurt she got defensive. 

Post # 5
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

My first thought was that she was joking, too, but then I read your second post.  Did you tell her that her words were hurtful?  Could she possibly be projecting her own old insecurities onto you (did she feel rushed to marry at some point because the relationship wasn’t so great)?

Try not to let it bother you too much, but I can understand why it would be hurtful coming from your mom!

Post # 7
4887 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My grandma told me she thought my dress was ugly and that she didn’t care that she wasn’t the one wearing it, she just wanted me to know.


People say stupid, hurtful things.  You’ve gotta just keep on keepin’ on.

Post # 9
3968 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I can imagine my mom saying this… but in a totally sarcastic way. If it really hurt you though, you should say something to her. Just like, hey mom, I think you were trying to be funny, but it really wasn’t to me… and see where that goes.

Post # 10
1488 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I can totally see my mom saying this, but her and I have a very dry, sarcastic sense of humor. I wouldn’t let it get to me if I were you. He obviously wants to marry you since he asked you. No worries!!

Post # 11
2321 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Just let it go. I think your mum projected her hurt feelings onto you. She didn’t actually mean to cause any harm. Now that does not mean that your hurtfulness isn’t ‘right’. Anyone in your position would be hurt. However, it is important to consider that you need not take it any further. You already called her out on it. Don’t drag it on. Focus on other/better things.

And I think your mum is hurt is because her own marriage didn’t work out and she fears that your guy might leave you too. So she thinks she’s doing a great job of suggesting that you marry before he has a chance to leave. I think that is what she meant to say. Still an annoying thing to say/hear but it’s not something so bad that you need to talk abt it any further than you already have.

Post # 13
3626 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I don’t know what kind of relationship you have with your mom, but maybe you should hold back on how much you share about the wedding so she won’t have the opportunity to offend you again.

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