(Closed) wierd question about fingering…

posted 7 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I wouldn’t be concerning myself over whether or not he’s gay, because that really doesn’t matter. What matters is the fact that he’s grossed out by your lady parts, and quite obviously cares only aout his own pleasure. I’d say this either calls for some sex therapy as a couple, or you need to figure out if you can live with this kind of stimulation, and if not…then you need to (sorry this is harsh) cut him loose.

Post # 4
Member
1296 posts
Bumble bee

I agree with the PP.  If you feel like your ok with him not touching you there then I guess good luck.  Obviously  you want to get touced there and I would communicate your desire to him.  If he still refuses then you have to consider if you can contiune to put up with this or move on to someone who wants to please you.  My SO on the other hand isn’t grossed out by touching me down below in fact he loves to.  I have no objections to that at all.

Post # 5
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

You don’t really say but do the two of you have sex?  It seems sort of strange that a guy wouldn’t want to touch you down there but would still have sex with you.

What really worries me is that you think he doesn’t like touching you.  It sounds like maybe he isn’t attracted to you.  I don’t know if it’s because he is gay or not but the two of you need to have a serious discussion and decide if you want to be in a relationship where you don’t have a physical spark.

Post # 6
Member
2237 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Wait, are you still with this guy (is he your fi)??? “So I was with this guy for a loong time, and he never made me feel like my body turned him on” sounds past tense….

Post # 8
Member
46326 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Odd that he thought touching you with a finger  was gross but it was ok to put his penis there.

Post # 9
Member
2154 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

He sounds like a terrible lover.

But for the record:

Bad at sex does not equal gay.

Vagina issues does not equal gay.

Not attracted to women does not equal gay.

Gay = likes penises.

Post # 11
Member
46326 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

and you had sex with this person who was so disrespectful, because….?

Post # 13
Member
1332 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2016

You should’ve taken one look at his peepee, called it gross, and slammed the door in his face!  I read your post to my fiance, and he was like “WTF?”  Your ex-dude sounds very abnormal, not necessarily gay, but maybe OCD/germaphobic.

Post # 15
Member
583 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What did this guy learn about women and women’s bodies as he was growing up? That’s the question I’d want to ask! 

Post # 16
Member
429 posts
Helper bee

most men do things of that sort 9fingering and oral perhaps) if he thinx its gross then yes there is a problem? talk to him.

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