Post # 1
Ok so my friend (hopefully brides maid i havn’t asked her yet but we have been riend since we were 7 so it’s expected lol we used to play wedding lol as kids lol so for the real thing ya she will be in it lol
Anyways on to the question she loves to play with her hair (she always till right now has used natural colours every single one in a million shades but natural)
Right now she has pink hair, I not getting married till next summer so its not even an issue right now i know when she gets board she go back to just having fun changing it up, but should i ask that she does not do wild colours that month now? Just incase the crazy colours are a new norm for her? or should i wait it out and say something later … or just say hey i love the pink but around the time of my wedding can you be red or blonde or black or brown or any combo of these in shades you like? lol is it to much to ask that
i just dont want her to clash with the dress or the decor or look a lil off in the photos, personally i love wild hair… hell i prob go baby pink or teal all over and be wild if it wouldnt give my grandmother a heart attack and who knows maybe if i can warm ppl up to it we can all be wild colours lol … but right now its kinda looking hippy outdoor rustic chic or more romantic urban chic so the hot pink head really wouldnt fit speially with the red and mint lol or orange and mint colours
what would you say how would you ask or would you just wait to see what she does … i kinda wanna tell her now so she can play it up all year if she wants to just ton it down for the wedding
Post # 3
I think it would be really rude to ask. You knew who she was and what she looked like before inviting her to be in your wedding. It wouldn’t be very nice to ask her to change.
Post # 4
I think asking her to do something more natural is a bit rude. she might decide to change it back from pink by then anyway so mentioning it now is super rude. Plus, if that’s who she is then why wouldn’t you want her to look like herself? She may even dye her hair to match your colours! 🙂
Post # 5
@Kissed_by_lightning: As is often said on the bee, bridesmaids are not dress up dolls. They’re your loved ones, and hopefully you chose them because you love them for them, and want their personality to shine as they stand beside you.
As someone who used to dye crazy colors all the time, and who will have pink hair on my wedding day, I’d be pretty bummed if my friend told me to change my color just for that one day, especially since I usually plan these things out pretty carefully for minimal hair damage. I’d feel like she was prioritizing that look over the human element.
(The only people I allow to tell me to mute my style are those who are paying me to do a job.)
Post # 6
- Wedding: September 2013 - Creek club at ion, SC
OK im going to go against the grain here and say just talk to her.
Bridesmaids are supposed to be your friends. I never understood why as soon as they assume that role it becomes impossible to talk to them. Its not like this friend has always been pink she is constantly changing so I dont see why “hey what are you thiking about doing with your hair for the wedding?” a normal girlfriend question becomes forbidden.
Just talk to her – im pretty sure she wont want to clash with your red and mint colours but If she insists on keeping the pink for it then it is what it is.
Post # 7
I think you shouldn’t mention it until she agrees to be your BM. And to be honest you probably won’t have to worry about it, she will possibly ask you about colour schemes/matching/clashing etc.
If you do eventually ask her, and she gets offended, you will have to suck it up if you want her to stand up with you!
Post # 8
Thank you much for all the imput …
I really had to ask this one b.c. i was slightly shocked she never ever does crazy colours so i was like wow thats different
Another element is that my groom already told me please just dont die your hair pink lol (i do go wild hair I have had pink and purple and green and teal) I do that alot and i love it, but he said it would upset his mom and her friends we are kinda doing the wedding more for our familys his mom is also funding alot of it so I dont really wanna do the one thing he told me not to… even if it’s not me i just about died laughing when i awe her new fb photo lol
I also have been asked to change my hair, i personally didnt mind, though the bride bugging me for 11 months about getting rid of it did bug me i kept telling her its purple now it wont be then chill lol
some of my friends said well she just wants to see you looking how she expects so she knows u can get it out lol … others said she was being crazy lol
thats why i really wanted peoples thoughts on it … I am really glad I asked cause i am pretty mellow I will go with the flow do just about anything someone needs me too when they ask me but i really wondered cuz some of my friends got angry when my friend had me change it that maybe they were right and i was being to chill lol
thanks again 😀
Post # 9
Please don’t as PP said you love your friend for who she is, not her hair color.
Post # 10
I didn’t vote because I did TELL my sister she was NOT having blue bangs at my wedding…
IF she had always played with her hair and had wild colours I would NEVER have had an issue with it…she started dying it weird colours only a couple months ago , and I totally believe it’s to try to take some attention at the wedding (she is like this whenever she is not in the spotlight)…
She is changing it, but having blue streaks in her hair (but not the bangs)..but the “natural colour” she was supposed to dye it to is NOT natural at all…she looks like ronald mcdonald….but, I’m not fighting on that….my photographer can change it in pics so when I look at it in the future that’s not all I’m staring at….
If I were you, since your friend always has wild colours, I would not try to change her….
Post # 11
My hair is often different shades of blue and or purple. If i were a bridesmaid I would dye it to suit the dress colour so I didnt look silly any photos. I wouldnt mind if the bride talked to ref hair colour and clashing but I wont like to be told or asked to chanage it by anyone. Just chat to her closer to day after she is your friend first not just a bridesmaid.
Post # 12
@Kissed_by_lightning: you had me right up until you said you don’t want her to clash with the dress or decor. C’mon now. She’s a person, not a tablecloth! Let her do what she wants with her hair.
Post # 13
I think it’s okay to ask her if she wouldn’t mind having it a more natural color for the wedding, IF you are prepared for her to possibly say no. It’s her hair, and she’s not an accessory.
Post # 14
@darkflame: I think the OP said that the friend did NOT have any wild colors until now…
Post # 15
I think you should mention her hair/fears of clashing etc. But only when you’re looking at dresses, and just sort of say something like “any idea what colour your hair will be at the wedding? We need to make sure it will go with the dress. Have you had any thoughts? I’m planning on red dresses”
If she changes it lots, this shouldn’t be a huge issue to say. But do not demand or anything, and prepare for her to say something off the wall. You have ot accept her hair may be crazy and not match, this is part of her and something you have to accept if you’re going to ask her.
Post # 16
I have a friend with wild hair, which I wouldn’t usually care about except in this case, it looks awful on her 🙁 I don’t have advice on how to handle this, but I totally emphasize.