(Closed) Will guests be offended if a mini-lock is put on our birdcage card holder?

posted 11 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
900 posts
Busy bee

I don’t know if it is offensive.  But it seems sort of pointless.  Most people probably won’t even notice.  I would suggest you get a cute lock or decorate it.  But I still think it is wasted energy.  If someone is gonna take the whole thing or even think to reach in and grab an envelope, I hardly think a lock will stop them.

Post # 4
239 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Honestly, if you get a lock that’s pretty and “goes with” the birdcage, I don’t think anyone will even notice. If it was me, I’d be happier knowing that my card (and its contents) were definitely going to make it to the couple.

I think there’s no reason for them to be offended by a lock if they’re not planning on taking anything out of there anyways, you know?

Post # 5
4566 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Is there a family member you can trust enough to stand guard over the box? I feel like if I saw a lock at a wedding, I would be a little… not annoyed, but I would definintely think it was weird. However, if you have an aunt or uncle or cousin standing at the table, it would be eyes and ears over that box.

Post # 6
1580 posts
Bumble bee

Maybe you position the gift table farther from the entrance. I can’t imagine someone who would be stealing cards would actually go through the trouble of opening the birdcage door to get the cards out (without being noticed), rather than taking the whole cage… so I don’t know how practical your lock is.

I wouldn’t be offended, but I would think it was a bit ridiculous.

Post # 7
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Talk to your day of coordinator or venue coordinator about it.  Many venues will stop by the gift table through the night and remove it and bring it to your suite, for safety reasons.

I think people would take the whole cage if they’re going to steal it, not just reach in, so it’s not a very good solution…

Post # 8
1523 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

My thought is that if someone wants to steal cards, the lock will not deter them. I can see someone picking the birdcage up and walking off with it. The can break open the lock at another time.

Post # 9
7172 posts
Busy Beekeeper

I don’t think I would be offended if I saw a lock – but I really don’t think it’s a deterrent, either.  Can you put the birdcage in a more secure spot, instead?

Post # 10
2765 posts
Sugar bee

We had a close friend watch the gift box…  it has to be someone you trust, since there is a decent amount of cash involved!

Post # 11
142 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

Hmm… I thought of this, but like everyone says, if someone’s intent on taking the contents, they’ll find a way….

Post # 12
1765 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

If I were to go with a birdcage, you better believe it’d be a freaking huge one so if someone picked it up, someone else would immediately notice. Large card boxes or ones that look pretty obvious when people are picking them up (Miss Star’s building shaped box, for example) work better as deterrents, not locks.

Post # 13
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I dont think anyone would be offended.  In fact at our wedding people kept coming up to us and GIVING us the cards even after we told them ‘there is a box on the gift table for them’ because they thought someone would steal the money.  Whatever made them think we had some place better to put the damn envelopes in the middle of the wedding is anyone’s guess. 

If it makes you feel better, go for it. 

Post # 14
2022 posts
Buzzing bee

We just had a card basket…I didn’t worry about it and as far as I know nothing was stolen!

Post # 15
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I wouldn’t be offended if it obviously matched the birdcage – honestly, I would assume it was part of the cage (unless you got a giant steel padlock or something – go with something dainty and white.)

At first I was thinking this wouldn’t matter because most people will give checks made out to you, not cash, but I forgot everyone gives gift cards these days. Those could easily be stolen.

A couple of other ideas if it’s something you are really worried about:

– You can find card holders that do not have a door that can be opened (for example, hat boxes with the lids hot glued on, with a slit cut in the top for the cards.) I suppose you have to dismantle them after the wedding. Also, getting something in a really big, awkward shape would deter anyone from carrying it off.

– You can assign a trusted family member to stand by the table when people are most likely to be dropping off gifts (cocktail hour or first hour of reception.) Have them empty the cage after this time and take all cards to your room, and maybe periodically throughout the evening.


Post # 16
2 posts

I don’t think they would take offense. I had a mailbox that was decorated for my cards and I just had one person that would every so often check it and take out the cards and keep them in a safe place in the brides room. So, that way there was never a lot of cards in there at one time.

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