Post # 1
Obviously, first-time mom here!
Background info: I’m a graduate student, and we get twelve consecutive weeks of maternity leave that we can take any time in the first 9 months of baby’s life. My baby is due at the beginning of the summer, so I’ll be taking my twelve weeks in the fall semester and will have a total of about 6 months off paid, yay!
However, I just today found out about the “consecutive” part of this policy. I had assumed that if my baby were to come a few weeks early, I could take off the last week or two of spring semester and then use my remaining 10-11 weeks in the fall. Buuut… nope. Once I start my leave, I have to use all twelve weeks consecutively, even if that means that I’m using them over the summer when I’d be off anyway! (This is a big WTF for me.)
So, if baby were to come, say, two or three weeks before the end of spring semester, would it be reasonable to leave my baby at home with my husband for 90 minutes to go teach my class? It’s a five-minute walk + a 75 minute class, twice a week. (You can get a sub for a week or maybe two, but after that you really need to physically be there.) Obviously, if she comes WAY early, I’ll just take my maternity leave in the spring, but that’d be a huge waste for just a week or two!!
I’m also a little bit concerned about myself physically a week after delivery. I don’t have to stand during class, but I do have to be able to walk the five minutes to get there and then be semi-functional for 75 minutes.
TL;DR: Can you leave a very tiny baby for 90 minutes with its daddy? Or will it be a total disaster?
Post # 2
I think you can’t predict until you have the baby. Normal vaginal delivery? Probably. In my particular cases with my kids it would have been doable. C-section with complications? Maybe not.
Post # 3
Not sure about being physically ok to go cause we have no idea what kind of delivery you will have. As for leaving the baby with the daddy, absolutely! Make sure he has formula or pumped milk on hand and go it’s 90 mins not 90 days lol. And if you wanna be extra prepared have the diaper bag ready and packed by the door in case there’s an emergency and they need to leave the house while ypu’re gone. The title freaked me out cause I though you are planning to leave your baby by himself and stepping out for 90 minutes for errands or something… I was like omg no! What if there’s a fire. I lost an aunt and an adult cousin in a house fire in Ukraine so I’m extra paranoid about that.
I think the 90 minutes alone with baby is actually geeat for both daddy and baby, gives them a chance to bond without you hovering. New dads sometimes feel left out when the mom is with baby all the time and is too scared to let him hold the baby.
Post # 4
- Wedding: September 2015 - Historic Chapel
howsweetitis: I think that would be fine, I had my baby a week before my birthday, so my mother in law offered to watch the baby on my bday so Darling Husband and I oculd go to dinner. It was the first time we had left the baby with anyone since being born, we were gone for a total of two hours. Baby slept most of it, woke up once and grandma fed him, then back to sleep. I think as long as you leave enough breastmilk/formula for the time you will be gone is fine. However as a first time mom I can assure you you will feel horrible leaving your babies side.
Post # 5
ana2017: OMG, hahaha, not by herself!!!
jnm_sha: Oh perfect, this is exactly what I was hoping to hear! (Other than the feeling horrible part, hahaha.)
Sounds like the issue might be more with my physical state than the baby. Good to know! I can definitely sit the whole time teaching, plus they’re extremely brilliant college students, so it’s certainly not difficult or demanding to teach them. 🙂
Post # 6
I would think you would need at least a week off, do they let you use a week of sick leave or something? Or have a sub 2 days?
After that I don’t see an issue with being gone for 90 min assuming you can have pumped milk on hand or formula. At 2 weeks I could safely leave the house for 2 hours (after just having fed baby).
Either way I think I would definitely make it work since I wouldn’t want to waste that maternity leave in the fall!
Post # 7
howsweetitis: I don’t see that there would be any problem with this. Baby and Daddy SHOULD have some alone time, and 90 minutes isn’t much. Depending on what you’re teaching, do you NEED to be standing? Can you teach from a sitting position? Can you have your students in discussion / small groups, so that you’re not lecturing the entire time? If you have a sub the first week (maybe even two) you’re looking at one or two more weeks that you would need to be teaching. This seems totally do-able to me.
Post # 8
howsweetitis: I had my daughter when I was a junior at a large state university. I lived 7 hours from family and lived with the father of the baby. I expected to have her in February but I had her the 17th of January, about 2 weeks after classes had started for the semester. I did not have a maternity leave. I had her vaginally, and was right back taking classes the day after I was discharged from the hospital.
It was rough, but I was told I would lose financial aid if I didnt stay in school and I also was very afraid of getting behind. My ex was no saint, but I think he did fine having her while I was at school. I just did my best to feed her and have her in a routine as best as I could. And it worked out fine. I, on the other hand, wish I waited a bit before going back to classes because my body was still sore and uncomfortable and I made the horrible mistake of wearing jeans to class the day I returned and it was the most terrible and uncomfortable feeling… after that it was leggings, skirts, and soft clothes to class haha.
Post # 9
What kind of class is it? People in my department who deliver close to the end of the semester have recorded lectures as a contingency in case they can’t physically get to class, and then arrange a proctor for a final exam. Obviously that wouldn’t work if the class was a lab or something, but in lectures and seminars I’ve seen it done successfully.
P.S. As a fellow grad student, I’m so glad to hear you have maternity leave, even if the terms are tricky to navigate.
Post # 10
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
It’s going to depend on your birth experience, your body’s ability to bounce back, and your baby. My DS nursed almost constantly, was very high needs frokm the moment he was born, I had no stash built up just a week after his birth, I leaked like crazy, was bleeding like crazy, hadn’t slept or showered much, and was generally not fit to leave the house at that point in time. 1 week off was simply not enough for me. But by 3 weeks post partum I would have been okay to be gone for that lohng. And by 4 weeks post partum I was back to work3-4 days a week for 5.5-10 hours at a time.
Post # 11
It might be doable with a normal vaginal birth, but I don’t know about a c-section. Is there someone who could drop you off right at the door so you don’t have to walk so far?
Post # 12
Baby and Daddy will be fine, but for me, the first week after the baby was born was grueling. There is no way I would’ve done even a 5 minute walk in that first week, let alone have enough wits about me to teach a class. I was exhausted, running on fumes and in a lot of pain and I didn’t even have a c-sect. However, I completely see where you’re coming from not wanting to waste that leave during the summer when it’s just a few hours you’ll have to commit to. If I were you, even given how I felt, I’d probably try to pull it off and use my leave in the fall. I hope baby comes after school ends!! Good luck!!
Post # 13
At one week post baby, I could barely walk (got stitches like a lot of other women) and was still bleeding…ughh
I couldnt imagine doing anything else in that time but vegetate.
Post # 14
kes18: Yes, I could definitely do a week or maybe even two with a sub, no problem. I feel just like you said–I want to make it work because it would be NUTS to waste my whole fall!! Hopefully she’ll come right on time and none of this will even be a concern!
Soon2bmrs1: Yep, I can be sitting the whole time and it’s a first-year writing class, so we do lots of in-class writing and small group work, so it’s not really demanding. And great point that it’d really only be for a week or two. If she’s more than a month early, I have no problem taking my leave!
BoriNena89: You are a total badass, mama!! If I have to make this happen, you will be my inspiration!!
lovekiss: Argh, okay, this is what I was afraid everyone would say. But I could definitely get one week off and probably a second if totally necessary.
Westwood: Hmm, I’m in Manhattan, so a five-minute walk is about as close as you can physically get, lol.
Post # 15
Yes you can. My bff had her first a month early. She’s a medical specialist and hadn’t finished the work she had to do on her cases before she had her so she had to go in for about 90 minutes everyday for 2 weeks until it was done. It sucked but she was physically able to do it. She did it between feedings and baby stayed with her husband.