(Closed) Will my BM be able to cope with a 4 month old baby on my wedding day?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Can my bridesmaid cope with a 4 month old baby and BM duties on my wedding day?
    YES - she will be able to do both...it will be fine! : (12 votes)
    92 %
    NO - she would enjoy the wedding more as a guest. : (1 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    668 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    If you’ve already asked her to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man then you are kind of stuck unless she indicates she won’t be able to handle it. Is it her first baby? She may be a bit more overwhelmed if it is. But by 4 months she should have a pretty good grasp on feeding and changing schedules. I’m sure it will be fine, but maybe have a conversation with her and bring up your concerns. You only want what is best for her and her new baby so just be honest and tell her that.

    Post # 4
    7556 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2013

    I think she will be ok but why don’t you take her out to lunch and ask her around February? 

    Post # 5
    327 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I think you should let your friend handle it.  I’m sure she will be able to handle it.  She told you she would be your bridesmaid. She knows what she’s going to have to do (pictures and all that). The husband it there and will care for the baby.  If it’s too much they might be able to get a family member to care for the baby for the day.  I know I would be really hurt if my friend had a conversation with me about having a baby and being a bridesmaid. 

    Post # 6
    3112 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    a 4 month old does need lots of mommy attention if she chooses to breast feed. Give it a little time & then check in with her. 

    Post # 7
    2016 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    my baby will be 4 months old at my wedding. Im sure she will manage just fine.

    Post # 8
    2467 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    honestly, I’d let your friend worry about this rather than deciding for her what she can or can’t handle. I’m sure she would be offended if you asked her to step down.

    Post # 9
    1796 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @finnaroo:  +1. There are a lot of possible solutions that she can use in order to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man at your wedding. Her husband or another family member can care for the baby. If she’s breast feeding, she can pump in advance so she won’t need to breast feed. She can take a short break every few hours to feed the baby. The bottom line is to let her decide.

    Post # 10
    642 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    If you want a friend after the wedding, dont ask her to step down or even bring it up.

    Yes, babies need lots of attention.  But moms also need time to themselves and have fun.  In the real world, unless the mom is the type who needs to be with her baby every second, 4 months old the baby will be just fine with daddy.


    Post # 11
    11232 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @kjo:  + a million

    It really depends on the type of person she is. My Future Sister-In-Law is a clinger, and has to be around her son every second. Another friend of ours was back at work (for meetings only) when her daugher was 6 weeks (though she was encouraged to bring the baby with her). She and her husband go out without the baby pretty frequently (for being new parents, anyway), and the baby is just fine.

    Post # 12
    561 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    yeah I would just casually bring it up closer to the wedding and let her know youwouldnt be offended if she stepped down and that you will still treat her as a royal guest or something. But some moms are super moms and some are just get by moms, so just go with the flow and let her decide and give her the out at any time.

    The topic ‘Will my BM be able to cope with a 4 month old baby on my wedding day?’ is closed to new replies.

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