- 4 years ago
- Wedding: September 2015
FI and I have heavily discussed moving our wedding up from Fall of 2015 to Spring 2015. The final decision would be made in 2 weeks, a year from the spring date we have in mind. I’ll note here that I really want the spring date. We’d gone with fall all along, but a three year engagement, when we can afford a wedding sooner is just too long. It’ll already be at least 2 years anyways.
Now, we haven’t discussed this with too many people, just our parents and wedding party (whatever date we go with they’d need to be available). Today I get an IM from a friend of mine, A, who’s also engaged asking if our mutual friend, M, would be helping out or standing in my wedding. I said no, but that FI wanted M’s husband to be a groomsman (possibly even best man?). She tells me that their date is the weekend after our spring date and M is going to be a bridesmaid and she doesn’t want to overtax her if we’ll be moving up the wedding.
We all share friends so the overlap between our guests and theirs is a fair number of people; some local to them and would be travelling for ours, others who’d have to travel to both. My main concern is M and her husband, K, though. They are fresh out of college, not working real people jobs yet, and this would be two weekends in a row they’d need to take time from work for. Also, M and K work at the same place.
A isn’t saying I should keep the fall date or find another date that we like. She thinks it’s quite do-able for K to be in my wedding one weekend and M to be in hers the next. She says that as long as we (she and I) keep it easy and stress-free for them, it shouldn’t be a problem. Neither M nor K have spoken to FI and I about being worried about the dates, but they’re also very non-confrontational. They’d rather overload themselves than say something.
I know you only get one day, and I know she had her date first (they’re also having a long engagement), but my main concern is inconveniencing the guests who’d be invited to both. It’s not a large number considering the amount of guests we’ll have overall, but still. Do you think having our weddings essentially back to back will be a problem? If so, how can we make it as easy as possible?